Dear Ex

Philippines
August 11, 2010 11:17pm CST
Three years ago, I was in a relationship that changed my life forever. It was the first serious relationship I had. It was a relationship that I would've cherished for the rest of my life. Sadly, it didn't turn out that way, and maybe because it was something that wasn't meant to be. It took me a year to get over it, and I'm glad to say that now the scars are healing. But we didn't get the chance for closure. For want of words to describe it, I'm sure those of you who have experienced this somehow know how it feels. Sometimes don't you just wish there had been a chance for closure? For all of you who knew how it felt and for everyone who wished for that chance, if you can say one final message to your ex, what would it be?
2 people like this
9 responses
@juicekodai (1121)
• Philippines
12 Aug 10
i know i how it feels if there is no proper closure.. we didnt have a proper closure with my ex.. he was the sweetest guy i have known... i considered him as a best friend too.. i thought his love was for real but it was not.. i actually wrote a letter for him, which he wasnt really able to read.. it was just in a notebook that he gave me.. i had a lot of questions.. i had a lot of WHYs.. it took me long to move on.. i just wanted us to talk and end everything but it didnt happen.. i still just want to thank him for letting me feel being loved even just for a short time...
• Philippines
12 Aug 10
aw that's sad. but at least he became a huge part of your life, and i'm sure the good memories will remain. had done the same thing. :) i wrote him a letter the day we that started our relationship. been writing ever since, throughout the 2yrs. but he was never able to read it too. so much for a past love *sigh*
• Mauritius
12 Aug 10
Final message would be that " i was happy and believe in you , and trusted you but it happen that your family was more important than me. I dont have regrets for all the time we had together but will never forget the pain and it has change my way of thinking and till now there are things that i cant do because of this relationship, but i do hope that you find someone sincerely and be happy as i am now today."
• Philippines
12 Aug 10
that's how it is when we loved and lost someone. it takes time.
@arko009 (256)
• Kolkata, India
12 Aug 10
I know how you feel,I lost my love last year,and it was a long 4 year relationship,and it was really horrifying for me to accept the fact that I have to live without seeing her.Its been one year now,and still I feel her every single breathe,I don't know how to get rid of her from my feelings,I cant work properly,I cant eat,sleep properly.And I desperately want that last chance,but I know that it is not possible,and having back her in my life is a dream for me right now.So,if I am given a chance to give her a message for the last time,then I would like to say to her "Baby please don't leave me,I am nothing without you,you complete me,without you I am incomplete,and I still love you,please come back,please come back to me my love."
• Philippines
12 Aug 10
wow, 4years? that's long, and it must be really hard for you to move on. but hey, who knows what surprises life has for you. *wishes of love and health* :)
• United States
13 Aug 10
First love is the sweetest and unfortuntely the first cut is the deepest. I've never been in relationship that was hard to let go of to be honest, so what i've said to my exes was enough i don't wish to see them or run into them ever again. Right now, i'm focused on school and graduating and becoming successful, so dating has been put on a backburner for me.
@mauricel (113)
• Philippines
13 Aug 10
Getting closure form a relationship that you cherish is one of the things that a failed relationship usually don't have. I myself is experiencing a recent heart break. But for a final message. I can say to my ex-partner is "You know that I do care for you a lot. Sometimes not all good things are meant to last. Letting go is not that easy so as moving on, especially if I know in my heart that I love you and i want you back. But I can do anything about that because I know I shouldn't. For now all I can say to you is you take care of yourself coz I could not be there to take care of you. Be happy in your choices and someday maybe someday when our path will cross again we could settle everything in much more mature way. Thank you for the memories and I will cherish them forever. Good bye and God Bless You!"
@2855994 (126)
• United States
12 Aug 10
I really have nothing to say to my ex-husband except good-bye and good riddance! It took me almost 20 years to finally leave that down-trodden and abusive relationship. My closure came when I turned the key in the door knob of my new house. My kids and I danced all around the living room thanking God for setting us free!
@dawnald (84199)
• Shingle Springs, California
12 Aug 10
You know, I had an opportunity to talk to my ex quite a lot. I had quite a few final messages. It was never enough, and it was never satisfying, because ultimately I didn't want the breakup. And eventually, he didn't want to have anything to do with me. I don't know what the answer is, but talking to your ex isn't it.
@Angelgirl16 (2174)
• United States
12 Aug 10
Hi alexxismonique, Ending a relationship can be devastating,especially if it is the first love. We can't say why it sometimes takes such a long time for the scars to heal,but we are happy when the started to heal. If a relationship must end, it should end without a whole lot of drama, and have closure. If there is no closure the memories, good and bad, will haunt you until there is closure. Everything that you seek closure on may not happen, so choose the most important thing from the relationship that you need closure on (cheating,lack of attention,abuse, etc.) so that you will be able to move on with your life. If getting closure is not possible between you and the ex-partner, then you have to let it go. Do not let a failed relationship without closure keep you from starting a new healthy relationship, even if it is with yourself for awhile. Good Luck
@kedralynn (992)
• United States
12 Aug 10
I've been there many times. I have many failed relationships. The worst was a 3 year one that honestly was toxic for us both but we held on until things fell apart. Sadly it ended on horrible terms and we both hated each other for a long time. It took us many years (about 9) for us to even be able to speak to each other and that was by chance when he showed up where I worked. He apologized for treating me badly and I apologized for running away and explained that I had to for the sake of both of us. It was perfect closure and there's still much for us to say but we probably never will... I guess the biggest thing I want to say is to any of my ex's is that I'm sorry for anything and everything I may have failed at. I was young and messed up plenty. I'm only learning how to be a good girlfriend now. And I think I'd also thank my ex's for helping me learn to be a better person.