How I Wished I Have the Gift of Words

September 7, 2010 8:15am CST
This afternoon, my friend consulted me on the results of her mom's biopsy results. And it reads, "invasive ductal carcinoma." Then she asked, "is this it?" I was so stunned, all i did was nod and gave her my ready shoulder to cry on. How i wished i have the gift of words to tell her that everything would be fine. I myself got tearful when she said, "Oh God! My mom is already old!" Speechless as i was, all i could do was hug her. I really didnt know what else to say, i dont know how to make her feel any better. Has this happened to you? Have you felt frustrated and wished that the right words would just fly your way ready for your grasp and read it loud enough to soothe your friend's fears? I wished there was something else i could do.
5 responses
• Philippines
4 Oct 10
I have a friend who confided in me that her mom had an illness. She was so distraught that she was crying while telling me the story. I am a person who does not deal well with tears, especially when the people around me are crying. I did not say a thing for I was afraid I might say something wrong. I just let her cry and listened to what she had to say and comforted her without saying anything at all. After, I tried to make her laugh because that was what I was good at. She thanked me, though. Fortunately, her mom's doing great.
• United States
7 Sep 10
Grace, what you did was perfect. Often times sorrow calls for tears and not words. You comforted your friend. Well done. When I have suffered, I just wanted someone to be there, understand and comfort. That is what you did.
@cher913 (25782)
• Canada
7 Sep 10
sometimes even the gift of words cannot help you when you are suddenly shocked like this. all you can really do is be very supportive of your friend right now. they will no doubt need it.
• India
7 Sep 10
This has never happened to me but I think that in these times it is your presence which matters to your friend and not your soothing words. The words will take her sadness away for a while and then afterwards when you are not there, she/he will again start crying. Then there is no shoulder for her to cry on.
@Szeksz (7)
• Hungary
7 Sep 10
The way you described it means you already have a gift, a gift of compassion. The gift of words is not even necessary here. You did what you had/could do, and it was more than enough in the situation. Sometimes it's best to stay silent.