Cannot get my belongings back. Need advice.

@Ramaditya (1227)
Indonesia
September 20, 2010 9:29am CST
Alright, I will make it short. A month ago, one of my friends borrowed my external hard drive (HDD). All my movie files were there, many of them were rare and hard to find. A week ago, we fought because of our personal problem, and I could not get my HDD back. I have tried contacting her, by good intention and even by force, just to regain my HDD. I told her I'd take it myself but she did not want to meet me and she did not want to ship it to my place. I haven't got any contact of her friends either, so I am stuck here. It is impossible to let the police know and say, "Sir my hard drive is taken and I cannot take it back because we fought," right? It will sound silly! So, any idea, guys?
2 people like this
8 responses
• United States
21 Sep 10
Keep contacting her as much as you can until you get it back, or contact people who know and tell them to tell her to give it back to you. See, this is why I never let people borrow my stuff, unless it's my boyfriend, but I only let him borrow small things, nothing that important and that I can't easily replace. I once let a friend of mine borrow my "Mandy Moore" CD and that CD came back with scratches all over it. That was when I flat out said, "I am never letting anyone borrow stuff like that again." One of my friends asked me one time if she could borrow something off of me, and I told her, "No." When she asked me why, I told her that I couldn't let her borrow it because there was guarantee that I would get it back or that I would get it back in one piece. When she heard me say this, she was mad, but I didn't care because that's my stuff and it's things that I need. If she wants it so badly she can go buy it and get herself.
@Ramaditya (1227)
• Indonesia
21 Sep 10
Agree. I better lend someone the copy, but it is unfortunate that I haven't backed up my data from my HDD yet. Thanks for sharing anyway.
1 person likes this
@Ramaditya (1227)
• Indonesia
21 Sep 10
UPDATE: One of her friends contacted me this evening and said that she has already sent my HDD, and I said I would wait for two weeks (that's long enough), and I am going to check it out tomorrow to the post office.
1 person likes this
• United States
21 Sep 10
Well, good luck, and I really do hope that you get it back, but you learned your lesson. From now on, only lend a person copies, don't lend them something that is of major value to you.
@eden_shii (506)
• Australia
20 Sep 10
I also had a friend who experience similar problem but what was borrowed from her was just a certain amount of money which we can earn. But what was taken from you is really precious since, as you said, the external drive contains hard to find movie files. Does the two of you have a common friend? Why not try to ask this person to get the external HD in your behalf? Just in case a proof will be asked from your common friend, you may let him/her bring along your authorization letter or some sort. :D Alternatively, you can go with the common friend and go to the person's place to get your external HD. I don't know if this will work but I will be in your situation, this is what I'm going to do. Just remember to stay calm, cool and humble. I know, this is easy to say but hard to do. But I think this is the best thing to do. :D
@Ramaditya (1227)
• Indonesia
20 Sep 10
That's the problem. I don't have a friend which is her friend, too. The only way I can try is to come to her place, but she does not want to meet me either. I will try my best to keep calm then. Thanks for your advice.
• Australia
21 Sep 10
That's correct. Try to be as calm as possible. It is really a problem because you two don't have common friends.
• Singapore
21 Sep 10
Seems that your friend has no intention of giving it back. There's no use considering her as a friend. Just because you fought, she doesn't want to give it back? Well that's simply too ridiculous!!! Since the HDD has a lot of important files, you should let the police know as this is considered stealing. I have a similar problem here except that it's related to money matters. I lent somebody whom I consider a friend $231 as he needed it to foot his electricity bills immediately or it'll be cut off. He told me he'll return it to me on the 12th. Alright the problem is, I think the money hasn't been returned and what date it is today? He has gone to an overseas trip for a month and I can't contact him. I feel like suing him and sealing his fate by telling everyone about this misdeeds, especially the police post where he's doing some operations.
@Ramaditya (1227)
• Indonesia
21 Sep 10
It was ridiculous. And, I never imagined that she would do such a nasty thing (just realized it today), that she told her friend I terrorized her by calling and texting her all the time! Of course I'd do that because I want my HDD back! Well, just wait for two weeks then, after that I will leave it up to the police and let everyone knows (I'll tell everyone including in here who she is, so you may remind her and find her profile on the net).
@RossBoyy (161)
• United States
21 Sep 10
Yeahh its still theft if shes not willing to give it back so contact your local police and explain it to them. All should be okay soon! :)
@Ramaditya (1227)
• Indonesia
21 Sep 10
Thank you. I don't want to call her that way, but if she keeps my HDD without returning it...wel...
@angelface23 (2496)
• United States
20 Sep 10
It's just the prinicple of the siutuation. If you borrow something then you need to give it back regardless of what happens. I would call the police if it's been say a month and you haven't gotten it back. Set aside a certain amount of time. I would even tell her look, you have my hard drive, i've been trying to get it back and you won't return it. I'm giving you until this date to give it back or Im gonna have to call the cops. It's your hard drive, don't feel bad if you have to resort to the police.
@Ramaditya (1227)
• Indonesia
21 Sep 10
Yes, thanks for your support. I think I will give her a month then I will report to the police.
@jujunme (2514)
• United States
20 Sep 10
In the first place i don't know why you would lend a friend something that is so precious and important to you.it sounds to me as if your friend has no intention of giving this back to you as it has already been a month simce she borrowed it.The question i have for you is,even though i believe you lent this to her do you have any proof that she borrowed this from you? in other words did she sign a paper with her signature stating that this was a loan?if she did, you have every right to take this to the police ,who will make sure you get your property back or she can be arrested, since holding someone elses property and refusing to give it back is a crime. if not, there is very little you can do to get it back as you have no proof she borrowed it from you except your word and she can deny she even has it.the only possible solution i can come up with is, if you possibly have an older relative or friend who can actually go to hger home and insist she give you back your property.Either way , either way i'm sorry this has happened to you and i wish you luck.
@Ramaditya (1227)
• Indonesia
21 Sep 10
No, I was not that strict. But I do have many friends that recognize my HDD, and even friend of mine that bought it for me in the first place.
@ishbish (13)
21 Sep 10
how about a lawyer? maybe they can suggest something.
@chona0912 (104)
21 Sep 10
hi , why don't you call her parents , or her teacher or somebody close to her . Why don't you go to her place and talk to her parents. But if you can afford to buy another , just think that you have donated your HDD or charity in that way it will not stress you out.