Do you bother other people when they don't seem not to bother you in return?

don't bother, keeping it to yourself, being selfis - Don't bother when you have no purpose otherwise it could be annoying to other people.

By neelianoscet

@neelianoscet (9615)

Philippines

September 26, 2010 10:31pm CST

I observe other people would really appreciate you when you show them that you truly care for them and they would reciprocate your kindness. In other instances their are things which comes as annoying when they never appreciate or worst they don't seem to bother to appreciate they just let it pass like the feeling like I just here but they treat you as invisible. How would you feel when you are treated like that despite your effort to befriend or form a peaceful relationship yet they seem never totally show they dislike you but they seem not to bother? Anyway, you could either act this way just ignore them or talk to them forward letting them know what you really feel. or else you could stop bothering them as you feel not important to them like they seem more focus on other things while you feel being left behind. Bothering in a positive way not in annoying way could be a good behavior such as showing kindness that you care without expecting any favor in return. Or you could be like anyone else don't bother then their would be no problem at all especially when their is no purpose. [b]How about you, would you still continue to bother other people who never bother you in return? You could bother in a nice way not in annoying way.Peace. /b]thanks

5 people like this

15 responses

purplealabaster

@purplealabaster (22094)

• United States

27 Sep 10

There are people that I have tried very hard to like, and I have done things for them to show that I am trying to establish a positive relationship with them for the sake of my family. Unfortunately, they never seem to acknowledge when I go out of my way to do things for them, but they always complain when I don't do things the way that they think they should be done. I am not going to compromise myself for people like that, so now I do not acknowledge them, either.

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

4 Oct 10

hi purpleblaster, Good to see you here. Some people are really born like that as in they have no feeling or does not really like to recognize a person for being thoughtful or affectionate, they are just so selfishly focus on their own world. So it is the right things to do to ignore them when they didn't seem seem to care and they just live to suck other people energy without appreciating them in return. So just like you mention it is nice to keep a strong relationship develop only to those who are close to you. thanks for your lovely response.

3 people like this

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

6 Oct 10

They would only realize your real presence when they already down or have immediate needs so they are mostly around other people whom they thought as real friends when in fact true friend are just around the corner so simple with the way they approach but have a genuine heart who truly care. Though sometimes you could choose your friends but at the same time when it comes to other people you have choice to make to help them even though they could not reciprocate you in an instant as they are also in deep trouble but a simple thanks would suffice. thanks..

2 people like this

purplealabaster

@purplealabaster (22094)

• United States

5 Oct 10

I think that you are right, Neelianoscet - they are selfishly focused on their own world, so when things go the way that they want they really don't notice as they think it is just the way it should be. When things are not exactly as they want, on the other hand, then they are insistent on making things "right". Once they have made up their minds about someone, there is nothing that can be done to change that opinion, because they could not possibly be wrong.

It is definitely better to focus on the people that we are close to and bond with rather than wasting our energy trying to please people that will never really care about us.

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@kun2349 (23381)

• Singapore

28 Sep 10

If they treat me as a real friend, i dun think they will treat me in this way. But if they do, it can only mean i mean nothing to them.. haha =D In a way, i get to see the real face behind them, and know they are just being superficial to me

Since they are treating me that way, i dun see any reason to treat them any better either.. lol =D After all, once bitten twice shy right? Why humiliate myself again by turning to them. I will be sure to do the same thing to them if they turn to me again.. haha

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

4 Oct 10

Well, it hard to determine the real person especially if they are hiding and far away. So I could say that you could only know the real person when you both see each other before making any move or judgment. So to be safe it is better to know the other person interest if they both intertwined with each other since it is very disappointing when the other person are the only one who reciprocate while one could not hear any feedback. thanks

2 people like this

@janeajozelle (197)

• Philippines

27 Sep 10

showing concern especially comes from a caring person makes me feel happy. while if other ignore my good intention it is their lost not mine. i am going to help only those who know to help and thanks me in return.

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

4 Oct 10

hi janejozelle, I feel the same things though if I really like to help i do so even if the other person does not bother to return and maybe she is shy or does not have enough resources to return the favor or even she have not a simple thanks would suffice. thanks.

2 people like this

@fantasticbabe (981)

• Philippines

27 Sep 10

I would not care i would only befriend those who show interest to me so long we both feel the same. so in the end i feel not deprive. i could only learn to care to the person who need my attention. otherwise their is no need to waste time.

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

6 Oct 10

hi fantasticbabe, Ok, that why you have a freewill to choose whom you like to befriend are the one who show lot of interest and not lack of interest. Somehow those who tend to neglect you in the process of bothering would realize later their biggest mistakes since you could offer a genuine friendship which is very lacking from their acquaintances. thanks.

2 people like this

@mcharney89 (45)

• United States

27 Sep 10

I've been on both sides of that situation. When I was the person being bothered, I felt a combination of annoyance with the person, feeling sorry for them, and being aggravated with myself for not telling that I don't want to be friends. If I'm the one doing the bothering, well in the past I was just an idiot. I am aware of the person's lack of interest/appreciation, but a stubborn part of me resents that the person is not being honest with me (despite the fact I do the same thing in their shoes) and continue to talk to them until the person fesses up or I finally wise up to my stupidity, haha. Honestly, I think it is a waste of time to be friends with someone who seems to have no interest in you. Just pull back and find someone else who deserves your time and attention.

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

6 Oct 10

hi mcharney, In the first place they are the one who make the first contact though you do not like to embarrass them by telling the truth just remaining nice could be still acceptable though in extreme cases telling them frankly that you do not like them to bother you would eventually stop them from bugging you. Well, in your case you also the one who bother it only mean you are very interested or develop fondness with the person though it very disappointing they are very timid to reciprocate you. I think their is a reasons behind all those pestering and some would not stop until they are successful with full determination. otherwise it is reasonable to stoop just to stop humiliating one self in the process of bothering other who seem to develop no reaction. thanks for your lovely response.

2 people like this

@pinoycity (575)

• Philippines

27 Sep 10

Better not. Why bother to bother those people who does not want to be bothered? You will just be wasting your time bothering them.

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

4 Oct 10

hi pinoycity, Ok that also what i do most of the time but if the person is very interesting i would still waste my time on him/her until she/he get notice me. But not the reasons i like a favor but just like to know them better..thanks.

2 people like this

@SHAMRACK (8576)

• India

27 Sep 10

Dear friend, I hope this type of attitude hurts those who really wanted to be cared and go well with others. Moreover as a social being we all like to go well with others. In this situation I may just go with my own way, may be being nice with them, moreover I do hope if they are not creating other problems that hurts me. I may go own with my own way. If they too think I am avoiding and if I feel so, I may go myself and mingle with them.

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

27 Sep 10

hi shamrack, As long as you know you have a clear conscience then don;t let other people who seem snob about your concern and care then they still treat you as nothing. Then I think it is up to you when you continue your good attitude and you would be blessed. Though if that similar situation happen to other people they would develop hatred to the person who treated them like nothing. I think being nice create good karma you could continue being a good person even those around you never seem to appreciate. So long you feel happy and expect no favor in return it would still be alright. thanks for replying.

2 people like this

@Hatley (163781)

• Garden Grove, California

27 Sep 10

hi neelianoscet sometimes when we try to make friends with others,'it does not happen in spite of what you tried.,so then I really give up and feel if they wanted to be friends they would have returned my overtures of friendships.since they did not I just am pleasant but make no more attempts. Then it is up to the other person. sometimes people have surprised me and extended their own overtures to me. I then will reciprocate and become friends, this happened to me not long ago and I have now got a really interesting friend whom I like very much. we found we had a lot in common so it was fun to be with her.I am not much for bothering others even in a nice way.I first need assurance that'this person really wants to be a friend. that is just me I guess.

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

27 Sep 10

Hi hatley, That a nice attitude as you really know the kind of people you so go around with. Especially sharing the same interest or activities you would come to like them and in respond they do same sharing the same common interest. having surrounded with friendly and nice people is a go way to live life at it best. it is totally stress free and you could enjoy seeing, talking with them with little contradiction. Thanks a lot for replying.

3 people like this

@indahfth (11161)

• Indonesia

27 Sep 10

I do not care people will respect me or not. I'm just going to be myself, I do not want to be someone else, just because I want to be appreciated. I'm not bothered by other people do. I'm not going to disturb them too. Although I often feel uncomfortable with someone, I always try to create a comfortable atmosphere, without having to be someone else.

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

27 Sep 10

hi indafth, You have a positive attitude though other people seem too focus with their own busy activities and I think anyone have the freedom to choose whom they bother as long as it is being nice not annoying. Though it is a good feeling when you know deep inside the other person show good behavior when they see you and even no to the point of helping because you are asking a favor. But just a purpose of being recognized such as when you bump with each other but they seem to act like the two of you are strangers it could be hurtful. But you don;t mind them at all as you continue your daily normal activities it would benefit your self in the process. thanks for replying.

2 people like this

@meapas (2436)

• India

27 Sep 10

If you feel someone need your attention and care, then do what you can for them. Forget anything in return. Never expect anything in return for your kind action.

action and reaction

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

27 Sep 10

hi meapas, Ok, that is I call unconditional love and i think only few people are selfless mostly are so self absorb. More focus on their own self improvement without bothering to show concern or care as they seem so busy with their own life. But you have a good point just focus to bother people whom the one need help as some could not pay back but a simple thanks would not hurt. thanks a lot.

2 people like this

@flower21 (765)

• Philippines

27 Sep 10

i hate to bother other people and i also like them not to bother me. especially when they have no connection with me. i am easily get tired bothering some who show no interest if he is a snob. i just like to love myself first before bothering other they may think i annoy them.

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

4 Oct 10

hi flower21, I do the same way unless I have interest on them otherwise i would not waste my time especially if I see that they also timid to know me. So i would rather concentrate myself doing important things than focus on them. thanks,

2 people like this

@carmelbg (519)

•

27 Sep 10

I have to say I would try for while with people but if my friendship was never reciprocated I would walk away. Friendship is a two way street and if the other person is not interested then they are not really good friends. We have tried to make friends with some new neighbours, we have visited them had them to ours for a barbecue etc etc but they never seem to reciprocate our sentiments. I am at a point now where I shall just leave it to them to make the effort as I have tried enough.

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

27 Sep 10

I thin the same way their is no use to sticking around or doing too much effort when the other person never seem bother to recognize you as friend or even as a simple acquaintance. it deeply hurt especially when you try to be nice but it seem no effect. So it is best to choose only friends who share the same interest so their would likely develop into real and long lasting friendship without any condition. I know what you feel it really very disappointing with the attitude of other people no matter you make an effort to please them they seem could not get enough and it get so tiring in the long run. With your attitude i think it is not going to hard to befriend you but somehow other could be so hard to deal so it is a wise decision not to force them to befriend you when they seem not interested and it is better to keep few friends who are real and not fake. thanks for replying.

3 people like this

raviteja_ravi84

@raviteja_ravi84 (2620)

• India

27 Sep 10

Yup i would definitely do that considering the fact that i care for them and there would be some faith in my heart knowing that they might care for me also. I would unnecessarily bother them so much that one of them might actually notice me and would then speak to me. My brother and i play together like this too much and suddenly if there is a small silence somewhere we would be there to show that at least someone is there to care.

If however i find that other people don't care at all then why would anyone bother even bothering them? Personally i think that such people might not consider anything even if a storm approaches. Cheers!

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

27 Sep 10

h raviteja_ravi84, well, that would be good at some point as long as the person who is the focus of your attention would not consider it as some form of stalking but a friendly approaches. You need a lot of patience and dedication through the times to get notice may take so a lot of time while for other they could get notice in a short time without putting too much effort. As long as you have a good intention then bothering other people could be equivalent to showing likeness to the person even they could fail to appreciate but you have determination. In the long run your fruit of labor could have a good result. While it is a good decision to stop bothering other people when many times you try they never seem to thanks or recognize you it could just be a waste of time. thanks for your nice reply.

3 people like this

• India

27 Sep 10

I think the initial response would be heartening and dissatisfaction when we see others not bothered for us. However, with time it is best to start ignoring these kind of people and carry on the life in its path. The feeling of being discarded even when we have tried to be too responsive, host with love and compassion, it is then the positive of the life that can save us from the patches of sorrow and sadness. This is why, I have always been like, if you do good, I will do good for you kind of personalty, Hence, I don't get much of the setbacks in life.

@neelianoscet (9615)

• Philippines

27 Sep 10

h chhetpt, Yeah, especially when you put a lot of effort and then it come to the point it become useless even if you do not expect a favor to be return even a simple thanks would do so. It could be hurt the feeling when you know the person who is the focus of your affection never have the desire to appreciate you in return it could be absolutely annoying especially when you observe many times they tend to befriend other people who they only know for a long time while you already tried hard to befriend them but they seem to appear very busy with no time. But you got a good point never let them affect your life as letting them would only ruin your good moments. thanks.

2 people like this

@CTHanum (8234)

• Malaysia

2 Nov 10

it does not matter if they do not bother me, if i feel like that i need to bother them i will do so.there are times when we are bother to be friends with others but they do not seem to have the same feel like us.then it is fine.but since we always meet them there must be chances where bond are connected and from there i think they will change to bother us in return.