FACT: Facebook ruins relationships
By melanierg
@melanierg (129)
Philippines
October 7, 2010 8:48am CST
i have recently deleted my facebook account. the reason is that i know for a fact that this site can ruin relationships.. my boyfriend and i are always fighting and this is the only reason for the fights we had had.. when we see pictures tagged by some friends from our past.. friend's who are not aware that the picture they tagged should not be tagged at all because it might be the cause of an argument or some sort.. and also everything including photos and all those sorts are posted for the entertainment of all your friends in facebook.. everybody knows what's happening to your life.. you don't have enough privacy than before when social networking sites are not yet invented.. i wanna live in the past where cellular phones are not yet around when everything's seems to be old fashioned but everybody else is contented and not at all bothered by what i'm experiencing right now.. maybe some of you have also been to this position.. what can you say?? i'm just lucky that my partner and i are doing everything we can possibly think of in order for our relationship to work.. if this is the cause of our fight then we should delete this. fine with me, i've got him and my friends and relatives could contact on my mobile phone anytime they want. :)
4 people like this
28 responses
@pitsieriray (130)
• Philippines
7 Oct 10
that just adds to the disadvantages of computers and social networking sites. i agree that if its the cause of your fights, then delete. we can all live even without facebook :D and also other gadgets. but because it is what we need nowadays, most people tend to have facebook accounts, cellular phones and others. my classmate's mobile was broken and she can now appreciate the importance of it.. she doesn't know what is happening and what is about to happen because she have no mobile to be contacted. in terms of facebook, we can contact our past friiends their and remember those times with the old pictures but sometimes it ruin relationship like you have said. :D
1 person likes this
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
thanks for sharing the same thoughts as mine. :) the reason why i had an account on FB is mainly because of the games, i was enjoying it for the first few months but then it came to a point that there's no fun in there anymore.. then i realized that i was just wasting my time ..and i stopped playing.. i concentrated more on connecting with my friends and it was fun reminiscing your past and all that.. and sometimes reuniting with them .. i think it has advantages and disadvantages.. :)
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
thanks for sharing the same thoughts as mine. :) the reason why i had an account on FB is mainly because of the games, i was enjoying it for the first few months but then it came to a point that there's no fun in there anymore.. then i realized that i was just wasting my time ..and i stopped playing.. i concentrated more on connecting with my friends and it was fun reminiscing your past and all that.. and sometimes reuniting with them .. i think it has advantages and disadvantages.. :)
@lealuvy2j (1986)
• Philippines
7 Oct 10
WI am amazed about how committed you are in making your relationship work that you deleted your facebook with no regrets. For me though it was the other way around because facebook actually helped my relationship with my boyfriend because for 6 months we had a long distance relationship and Facebook is one of the tools we used to keep in touch and be updated with each other's life so it not necessarily a fact that Facebook ruins relationships. 
1 person likes this
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
7 Oct 10
yes, we're happy with our decision, it's like in the bible that if your hand is making you steal stuff then you should cut off your hand for that matter :D we analyzed everything and came up with this, FB also helped us communicate in the first few months of our relationship but now it helped a little.. we're also far away from each other but not too far though, only one and a half hour away but still if we're not together, we communicate through our mobile phones, land line phones, we use our ym account.. and we see eachother through our webcam. :)
1 person likes this
@ElaineSpencer (152)
• United States
7 Oct 10
lealuvy, I second that. I didn't really use Facebook or Twitter that much when I was with my fiance, but now that I'm in another state i've been updating it nonstop. He works a lot, so when he gets home he can see what has happened in mt life during the day. I check his page when I wake up. Granted we text each other a lot, it's not the same as being with him in person, and a 420 character limit is better than 150. We have mobile web, so I can check on him while I'm at school, and he can check mine while he's at work. Some people would call it stalking, but sometimes its our only way of communication.
1 person likes this
@allamgirl (2140)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
well, i don't totally support that theory. yes, facebook is very public, but you can choose your privacy settings. and in terms of couple's fights, i think that that can be a bit immature. i mean, you guys can discuss about it but a picture (especially, one from the past)cannot totally ruin a relationship, particularly a strong one.
1 person likes this
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
you might understand this if you're in this situation, and eventually i got to a point when i get tired of discussing and explaining things which aren't really important. :)
@faisai (1138)
• Hong Kong
8 Oct 10
I seldom update anything about myself in Facebook and I found it quite interesting that people are so casual about putting whatever they can think of about themselves into Facebook.
I mean, if we really want to share something with our friends, isn't it way better to ask them out for a gathering so you can share whatever you want and see them laugh/cry/angry/whatever with you?
1 person likes this
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
yes, i agree with you.. it's just that this is really the trend right now and it's up to us if we try to adopt or we think harder if this can help us or not.
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
7 Oct 10
yeah, i agree. facebook is useful for business :) goodluck!!
1 person likes this
@rhodzptc (1317)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
I agreed with your point if view my friend, but we must face that this world we new is gradually innovating and even our private lives too. Being involved and part of this innovating society we can't prevent it that people can even stalked to our own privacy. It's like entering in a a room that full of scanner and X-ray. Some people find Facebook very interesting while for others it's not just like you and me.
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
10 Oct 10
I really don't know what has got into everyone with this FB phenomenon. I think it's a terrible thing. Anyone can find you and see who your friends are and they can basically stalk you.
I saw photos of my niece and she was obviously intoxicated, falling out of her skimpy dress and so on. I spoke to my brother about it and his response was that she was almost 18, sensible and responsible and that I should not be interfering and trying to make trouble in his family. I asked him if he had seen what she gets up to and he said he was not in the habit of spying on his daughter.
The whole FB thing leaves me cold I'm afraid. But let me say that I'm really pleased to see someone being sensible about it.
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
11 Oct 10
yeah, it's a different situation for everybody, as for me . i'm now choosing to have a normal and private life without people or even my friends watching my pictures and my activities. thanks a lot MsTickle :)
1 person likes this
@gaiza12 (4884)
• Philippines
11 Oct 10
You are right, Facebook can really ruin a relationship in a way. Me and my bf have fights before and the main cause is facebook. I don't want him to communicate with his past friends through it because i really don't know if the person he is chatting is his ex or just plain friends. I caught him one time almost cheating on me, i confronted him and asked him not to do it again. what he actually did was he never opens his facebook nor check the messages or tags or posts. I still open my facebook but i make sure i still get even a little privacy.
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
11 Oct 10
yeah much better to stop the things which can make you cheat or be the cause of arguments or some sort. thanks for sharing!
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
yes , it is really a killer..i strongly agree with this , i've been in this situation and being spied by your loved one is just unfair. your every move is being followed and you can't do whatever it is that you want anymore.
@keshia2007r (2880)
• United States
8 Oct 10
i think this is more of an opinion.
facebook has not ruined my relationship.
being that i'm in an almost 3 year relationsip
but all situations are different. it seems like it almost ruined your relationship
and you did what you did and deleted your account.
but did your boyfriend do the same?
anyway. i don't use facebook to flirt, nor do i have anything hidden in my pass that would break up my current relationship..
but good luck with all!
1 person likes this
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
yes, my boyfriend did the same thing, it was him that deleted my account and i totally agreed with him for our relationship to be harmonious .. and yes, each of us has different situations.. i'm not hiding anything from the past, but there are just those things that we're not able to tell them or we just left it shut and suddenly it just opened prematurely because of what was posted or tagged on my wall .:)thanks keshia for sharing what you have in mind.:)
@Mackenzie_jad228 (556)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
Well, I don't think so that it's the site that ruined relationships. Maybe you should be more cautious with the activity you been doing there. The reason why there is privacy setting is, it's your obligation to set your privacy so your friends wont be able to access everything you've been doing and posting. You should set the boundaries.
1 person likes this
@wollivierre (688)
• United States
27 Oct 10
Yeah it does because everyone keeps trying to tell you what to do and they are wrong most of the time and the people that don't want you together have a very easy way to break you up.
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
29 Oct 10
thanks for agreeing with me. :) my life is much easier now without fb :)
@elperdido (33)
• Philippines
7 Oct 10
I agree in some sort but you can have this social networking sites it is about how much time and information you give on these sites..
I have facebook but I am cautious on what I say and give out cause we all know the millions consequences.
Responsibility is the right term. I usually open my facebook to check messages and and check friends status. in some way it helped me to find old friends and unknown relatives.
Hope you enjoy your new found lifestyle.
1 person likes this
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
thanks!! :)i'm concentrating more on how to earn money than wasting my time doing nothing on facebook :)
@thirdylopez (175)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
I don't think facebook ruined your relationship. Your immaturity did. Or maybe his immaturity.
You both have to face that you had a past you were with other people before you met each other. If he or you are insecure about it. Then what you are obsessing about it is stupid. Whatever those experiences may be they made you to become who you are, possible the person he or you fell in love with.
Get over the jealousy over past exes live in the now and beyond.
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
and yes that's what we're doing, thanks for sharing your thoughts about us being stupid and immature. :) i guess u're perfect! congrats :) anyhow, i guess everyone's different from the others right? this decision of deleting my account is the best decision i had so far, i'm thinking of this as being mature.. so you think posting stuff and updating your friends on a day to day basis of what you are doing is mature? maybe you should think again. deciding on things which are making you happy or not is the mature thing to do :)
@louierrific24 (1114)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
Facebook does not ruin anything, it all depends on how it is used, either productive or counter-productive. It's like saying that money is the root of all evil while in fact money is a neutral thing -- same gos with FB! 
@kodukodu84 (1569)
• Malaysia
8 Oct 10
This is why my fiance hates Facebook, he has an account but never used it. I still have mine and he's not going against it, but we never try and let facebook or any social networking sites to let us down. I know what you mean about those picture tagging. My own friend is doing that. He broke up with his ex girlfriend and then found a new one. But still his friends are tagging a romantic pictures of him with his ex including kissing, hugging, and all, oh just because they have that picture, and they are well aware of his new relationship
. They also are arguing a lot about the same thing. My fiance and I are trying our best all the time to not let this kind of thing happens but we are quite lucky because all our friends are respecting our relationship and won't try to do anything like that without thinking of the consequences. Good luck to you and your boyfriend and have a nice day
. I know what you mean about those picture tagging. My own friend is doing that. He broke up with his ex girlfriend and then found a new one. But still his friends are tagging a romantic pictures of him with his ex including kissing, hugging, and all, oh just because they have that picture, and they are well aware of his new relationship. They also are arguing a lot about the same thing. My fiance and I are trying our best all the time to not let this kind of thing happens but we are quite lucky because all our friends are respecting our relationship and won't try to do anything like that without thinking of the consequences. Good luck to you and your boyfriend and have a nice day @melanierg (129)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
yes, most guys hate facebook. :D i've experienced it also , my friend also tagged me in a picture when i'm with my ex.. it's just awkward , even if my boyfriend knows my previous relationship.. it's still rude for a friend especially if they knew that i'm already in a new relationship. and i'm doing all these in order for us to have our peace of minds and so as we're not to be reminded of our past by those pics.
@kristeena (358)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
If both of you have agreed on deleting your facebook account to strengthen your relationship, then it would be fine. You have to do everything for your own good and think of ways to stop fighting.
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
yeah, thanks for respecting our decision :) we both agreed to delete it, :)
@jovie899 (112)
•
8 Oct 10
Yeah!No privacy at all.That's why i don't post anything that can result to problems.But through FB i found my long lost friends.:)
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
yeah, me too, i reunited with some of my college friends because of fb and i'm thankful for that .:) it just got complicated when my bf was always spying into every movement of my fb account. so much better to delete it to avoid any arguments. thanks!
@ardiebagz (83)
•
8 Oct 10
i respect what you believe in but you could see things in different perspective,,maybe your eyes is just fixed on a darker side..to every issue that you and your boyfriend that is having i guess its not the site that is to blame,,I'm not saying that you are,,but think of it..if you don't have nothing to hide then there's no need for an argument..its not with the site its with the people using not taking responsibility,,its my opinion ,,and i could be wrong...
@melanierg (129)
• Philippines
8 Oct 10
no, i think you have a point :) somehow i know that my boyfriend and i are kind of alike. we're the jealous type and just seeing some pictures from the past with our previous relationships makes us go nuts.. so we decided to delete our accounts so we can move on to another level and not always stumble on the memories of our past. :) thanks ardiebagz :)
