Which affair do you tolerate?

@creyos (275)
Indonesia
October 24, 2010 12:15pm CST
I was once giving out an "if" question to my friends, boys and girls. And the question was : "If you find out your spouse is having an affair with someone, which one will you more easy to forgive or even accept back, an affair with the opposite gender or an affair with the same gender?" And the results, most of my boy friends can tolerate if his spouse having an affair with the same gender person, which responded by most of my girl friends, including me, with a disgusting face as we tend to tolerate the affair of her spouse with the opposite gender person, well at least he's normal. Hmmm, does this relate to the man's nature of his ego? I never really sure because this just a small group opinion so let's find out on the bigger scope.
2 people like this
7 responses
@ToMatriX (94)
• Indonesia
24 Oct 10
An affair always be an affair. Same gender or opposite. The effects are the same, i mean there's probably something wrong with your relationship. But as a man (it's my personal opinion), probably if my spouse having an affair, i "probably" will more tolerate if she's have an affair with a women too. That's mean she's the one who's really have the problem, not mine. Lol
1 person likes this
• Indonesia
25 Oct 10
I guess that's mostly what everyone's thinking. your very welcome, Glad i can participate
@creyos (275)
• Indonesia
24 Oct 10
Hi ToMatrix, LoL yeah for sure, I can't accept my partner cheat on me, too. Just assume that we never know where our faith bring us, and our partner somehow said sorry and he/she means it (I believe every person can fall into mistake) then ask us to get back with him/her. Well, for me (I'm a girl), I would make sure there's no possibility for him to get back with me if he had an affair with a guy (the same gender). And about your opinion, that's what most of my boy friends similarly commented on the question. :) Thanks, ToM.
1 person likes this
@beeh13u (1038)
• Philippines
24 Oct 10
With the same gender because I can still think that my spouse is a bit confused. But with the same gender he made up his mind. I can still reason out that maybe he wants to try few things with the other guy. Still I can accept him if he returns.
1 person likes this
@creyos (275)
• Indonesia
24 Oct 10
Hi Beeh13u, sorry for asking but I can't get which one do you prefer. The same or opposite gender with him? You are female, aren't you?
1 person likes this
@sender621 (14894)
• United States
25 Oct 10
No affair should ever be tolerated. Cheating in a relationship is hurtful to both sides. forgiveness and understanding have to be part of the healing process. we should not just sweep indiscretions under the carpet. We have to face them and try to avoid affairs happening again.
@kingparker (9673)
• United States
24 Oct 10
To be honest, I can't accept both of such affairs happening in my life. If my spouse really love me, and think about me, why she must have an affair. That just not right. Love is love isn't it? When you love a person, you should not think about others. That is my personal thought about it.
@creyos (275)
• Indonesia
24 Oct 10
Hi, Kingparker. Of course, I never wish my partner to cheat on me. That's why I said it's an "if" question. :) Anyway, few of my friends answered the same that they can't accept any kind of affairs. So it's count to the neutral side. ;) Thanks!
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Oct 10
i dont care whether my husband cheat on me with a man or a woman, he's gone. i dont tolerate cheating. i would expect him to do the same if i were the one cheating. yeah, its pretty gross if i found out that my husband cheated on me with a an, and its pretty heart breaking if he cheating on me with a woman. But cheating is cheating. no matter who you do it with. i wouldnt forgive and forget that.
• Philippines
24 Oct 10
I don't tolerate any of those. I believe that once a partner gets involve into an affair with another person then the relationship is over. No second chances, no forgiveness. I'm not being rude, i'm just being opening my eyes to reality. Once cheating comes to the relationship, it will never stop, it may pause for a while but eventually it will be committed again and again.
1 person likes this
• India
24 Oct 10
i dont know about it as per me i cannot tolerate any type but come to think of it i havent think about something like this this think never have come to my mind when it comes to spouse u cant take what u can tlarate i cant tolarate anything as m doing no unfairness to her i want full trust in return