how do you react to harsh comments?

Philippines
October 24, 2010 11:52pm CST
sometimes people are just mean when they see a person they give harsh comments concerning physical appearance like 'oh you've gained weight'..or 'my! ur so thin ur like skin an bones' and such comments that makes us feel dreadful. do you think they're in the position to say or is it appropriate for them to make rude remarks to others or just keep it to themselves? did u have that kind of experience? do u find them offensive? how do u react?
2 people like this
25 responses
@jennbart (1330)
• Philippines
26 Oct 10
If they do not have anything good to say.. they better shut the hell up:) I once answered back to a person who told me that I was skin and bones and if I eat cause I look malnourished back then. I told her " you look like a cement mixer truck to me.. when will you ever look like me?" that shut her up!
@jennbart (1330)
• Philippines
26 Oct 10
I am just thin then but who is she to say I look malnourished? she laughed and mockingly told me I also needed to left in our kitchen so that I can eat. She rolled her eyes when I told her she is as huge as a cement mixer truck... and walked away. if she cant bear to be insulted with the way she looked, she better not say nasty things as well.
@digidon (165)
• Philippines
25 Oct 10
well.. the passive approach: ignore the comments if they are purely negative... if they are constructive criticism just give thanks and you'll know what to improve on...
@mhypie03 (683)
• Philippines
26 Oct 10
Well said. Some remarks are what we need so we can be aware of what needs to be done. But if it hits like below the belt, pulling down your self-esteem then let it pass your ear. Some things are not worth giving our attention afterall.
• Philippines
26 Oct 10
we can't deny the fact that there are people who are really insulting and harsh in nature, however, in my opinion nobody has the right or in position to loath and annihilate other person. altough i think i haven't encountered such loathing, im still against it and if ever i do, ill just tell them to look in the mirror first, no body is perfect and even if they are close to being perfect, that doesn't entitle them to annihilate people.
• Canada
25 Oct 10
When I was younger I would never stand for such attitude and would have been right up in someone's face screaming or yelling. Now that I'm older I now understand there are better things in life and I should be enjoying them instead of letting all the small things like people's comments and opinions bother me. Life is to short to worry and listen to other people's opinions and if they are saying mean or hurtful things then just steer clear of them and avoid the headaches.
• Romania
25 Oct 10
nu ai dreptate deloc
• Philippines
26 Oct 10
harsh comments are just things that you can take as a compliment so that you can improve and moved forward
@angyland (46)
• Australia
7 Nov 10
I don't let them affect me. They're not really in the position to make rude remarks like that, it's just nasty and unneccesary. Those comments are inevitable though. You could be the most beautiful person in the world and people will still make negative comments about your appearance. I believe that these spiteful comments often come from jealousy, or they're just unhappy people with low self-esteem and being rude makes them feel more 'powerful'. No one has really made comments to my face, but I have certainly had people make hurtful comments behind my back. You just ignore it, they're not worth your time.
@suspenseful (40194)
• Canada
25 Oct 10
I try to be as nice as I can, but that does not work so after a while I go and answer other discussions so they get to the 10 page . It makes me wonder if someday another mylotter might write about a mylot friend of hers or his who could not take it and killed himself or herself. I do wonder whomever made those mean comments would feel. Now if it was a comic book or the movies. that tormenter would be celebrating and bragging. I hope it would not be like that.
@angemac23 (2003)
• Canada
25 Oct 10
When someone makes a comment like this to me, I just avoid future contact wit that person ...I dont need someone making negative comments about me in my life so I just get rid of people like that!
• United States
25 Oct 10
When I was younger, people would make rude comments about my height. I am only 4 feet 10 inches tall. All through High School I would hear comments, like "Oh, look her comes the midget." And other rude things. It was much more hurtful for me when I was in high school. I think because comments were always made in front of a bunch of other people. Now if someone is like, "Wow! You are short!" I am just like, " Uh! Yeah, I know..." I don't let it bother me anymore. I don't feel that anyone is in the position to make rude comments about anyone. No one is perfect. Our imperfections are what make up who we are.
@sender621 (14897)
• United States
25 Oct 10
i try to take harsh comments as they were intended. i try not to take them to heart. i do my best to overcome them.
@megamatt (14293)
• United States
25 Oct 10
I try and take the comments in stride when I can. Of course, there are times where I am thinking some things similar to what people might say. Yet, I do not say them, because there are certain things that really might not be a good idea to say. I guess a lot of people do not have the necessary delay from their brains to their mouths. I think that most of the time, I just nod. Then I take the conversation in a completely different direction. Of course, there are times where I have been caught in a bad mood and fire back with something sarcastically. That is something that I really try not to do, but it just slips out. I guess a lot of the time though, I really take it in stride and just let it go. That is often the best thing to do, just let things go.
• Philippines
25 Oct 10
hi sweetmary86! I have known people who made harsh comments. She was assigned in our group, she makes a code to every person she saw in the office. Most of the time it was rude enough to hear. She was fond of doing and making it a laughing stuff. One time she told me "your blouse looks like..... you look funny!" What I did was ignore her in my mind why don't you look in the mirror check the way you dress up. She was too mean, and hear comments was ridiculous. Good thing I didn't even bother to mingle with her anymore.
• India
25 Oct 10
In this kind of situation sometimes makes me angry, suppose a person whom you are meeting after few days and first thing they start with this kind of words. It feel like that person is teasing you. In turn I also tease them with those kind of words. What to do? when there is no other option in front of you.
• Philippines
25 Oct 10
I simply accept the comment but i don't take it seriously. I don't feel bad about it because I know the truth about my physical appearance. Last year I gained much weight and they often call me pig though i'm not really that big. I didn't feel bad about it 'cause I know that I'm no longer at my lean and slim figure. I make harsh comments as an inspiration for me to improve myself if I need to..either physical or not. Anyway, those people who always give us harsh comments are either telling the truth or they just envy us. NOTE: No matter how harsh the comments you receive never feel upset. Never respond to that comment like you are letting them drag you down to their level.
@obitwo (349)
• Denmark
25 Oct 10
Yeah, I get most of us experiences to once in a while get a harsh comment. Whenever I get one, I just leaves it there. Don't comment on it, just let it be. If it's really harsh I'll put the post as "negative". It really depends a lot on the situation though. It's basically what I do in real life too. If someone comes up to me and says something harsh, I'll just ignore the guy, it usually works!
@hushi22 (4928)
25 Oct 10
i try to respond subtly asking why they reacted like that, but i make sure i respond straight to the point. =)
• Philippines
25 Oct 10
Hi Sweetmary86! If somebody gave me a harsh comment, I would answer back in a harsher comment, lol, . Ex. If somebody told me I'm fat, (and she's fat too) I'd say, Oh your pregnant!!! Let me see how they react now, lol. I don't think they will make any more harsh comment when they see me.
@dollar3235 (2062)
• India
25 Oct 10
It all depends on the situation, subject of the comment and my mood. If I am not in a good mood and someone comments like this, it will certainly be not a good day for him/her. However, if I am in normal mood, I used to avoid these comments to a certain extent. I personally do not like to speak something that will hurt someone.
• Philippines
25 Oct 10
I experienced a comment like you're being mock by them and it really affects me and they notice it by the way my facial expression is,but to my friends who knows me well they understand what is my physical condition is, so they don't treat me like that, when they are joking around with me about my physical condition I just take it as a joke and laugh about it.
• Philippines
25 Oct 10
yes...a lot of times..well if their comments are harsh ill ignore it but if its true..ill fix whatever the problem is like if im fat..ill have some exercise but if its way to overboard ill confront that person....