Sometimes, when we love, we forget ourself!
By raynejasper
@raynejasper (2322)
Philippines
November 12, 2010 11:37pm CST
hi fellas.. One painful reality about love is, we sometimes forget our personal happiness and we tend to focus on doing things that will make our beloved happy even to the point of sacrificing our own happiness.. and when the relationship fails, we still question ourself, What did I do wrong? and we put the blame on us. Didn't we give everything already? Sad but true but we only realize this when the relationship is over. 
2 people like this
18 responses
@hanni711 (243)
• Philippines
13 Nov 10
For me love is unconditional and we really sacrifice alot for the ones we love. When the relationship went wrong we should not regret about the things we sacrificed for him/her.Because we did it out of love. Let's just take everything as a lesson if the relationship won't work and give ourselves a chance to love again.
@veejay19 (3589)
• India
13 Nov 10
raynejasper, You have said that when you do something for your friend, you sacrifice your personal happiness.It is not true.Whatever you do, you do only for yourself and not for anyone else. Think of this.When you do something for the person you love isn`t it you who and only you who feels happy? And if your love fails then isn`t you and only you who feel sad? Actually we do not do anything for others.We do everything,whether it is good or bad only for ourselves because it is only we, through our heart, who feels the happiness or misery.We really are selfish creatures and whatever we do in our lifetime is only for ourselves and not for others.It is only when we develop love for God with complete devotion that we really become selfless.Think over this deeply and you will realize the truth.
@raynejasper (2322)
• Philippines
13 Nov 10
..I don't quiet agree with you veejay.. I do understand that when loving, it should be without conditions that you should not expect something in return from the one you love.. what I'm just trying to say here is that, if only people would achieve unconditional love, then nobody would be left hurting. Reality would always speak that there are people who takes advantage of someone who love them dearly to the point that they hurt that person. When I do something for the one I love, I do it for him because I like him to be happy and when I see him happy, I'm happy also. I don't agree with your statement that when we do something for our love, it is only we who are happy because we can always see if our love one is happy or not of what we did. In your personal life, have you not done any sacrifice for someone you love? I still believe that we do something for others and we do other things for our self.. Although whatever we do for others, would it mean sacrificing our own personal happiness is our own choice and if we fail, we accept it because we risk our happiness in the first place.
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
• India
13 Dec 10
Hello my friend raynejasper Ji,
Well, I am of the strong opinion that LOVE requires only sacrifice then why to repent after loving, on eneed not love for property/luxry life and lot many amenities which one would not have got if untouched by loving. Love means sacrifice. There is no question of suffering. Else means selfishness. Keep Smiling.
May God bless You and have a great time.
@blue65packer (11826)
• United States
13 Nov 10
When I was in a relatiionship I always forgot about myself! Always! When the relationship ened I thought I was the cause of it going wrong! I was the reason the relationship went wrong and sometimes other people told me this! It takes two to tango! Anyway I wish I could be in another relationship but I am better off with out one! In more ways then one!
@raynejasper (2322)
• Philippines
13 Nov 10
..well, I hope your experiences will teach you to be more cautious next time.. indeed, in love, its not suppose to be one sided.. both should be working together for the relationship to work.. try loving yourself more and give importance to your own personal happiness..
@surekharathi (14146)
• India
13 Nov 10
Yes love is very painful the persons who fall in love and they spend the whole life with each other then they are the lucky person. But in most of the cases love is fake. When we fall in love we are forget everything not only our life but our families also broken the relationship with our family but when this true love left us then we realize what we lost in our life.
I want to suggest every person if you love anybody then pls dont left her/him in the middle fully live each other whole life otherwise dont make a relations like love.
@raynejasper (2322)
• Philippines
13 Nov 10
..you are definitely correct surekharathi.. I just hope people would be more sensitive about their partner's happiness too.. after all, love is sharing all the happiness and pains.. its not a game..
@beeh13u (1038)
• Philippines
13 Nov 10
That's true. I forgot to treat myself because I focused to make him love me more. Then as time passed by, he let me go and I was very lost. After the break-up, I realize that I sacrificed a lot to him and I didn't have time for myself. All my time and money were to him. It's very abusing. But now, I will not commit that same mistakes again.
@raynejasper (2322)
• Philippines
13 Nov 10
..reality speaks.. experience is still the best teacher.. sometimes, we have to make a mistake in order to become better persons.. I hope you will find someone who will love you for who you are so that you won't have to strive to make him love you more.. let's make our self happy and remember that our happiness doesn't lie on anybody else. we make our own happiness..
@mods196621 (3652)
• Philippines
13 Nov 10
Yes this is the worst thing with people who are in love and too much in love with their partners. Like me, that is my no.1 problem every time i feel in love. I almost forget myself and other around me because all i know is I'm happy and my world getting better. i see the world positive in every aspects. I see all people around me all beautiful. Nothing's ugly!
@snowhybiscuis (1882)
• Philippines
14 Nov 10
My opinion is that we make our love ones happy because that will make us feel happy as well. Haven't you felt happy when you see the smile on the face of your love one? In return, making them feel happy, thinking about them and caring for them should feel right and good. We don't fail when we do this. The relationship fails for a reason. But it is not us who fails. If the relationship fails, then think that it is not meant to be. At least we tried. Then let us learn to move on. Remember the happy moments. Do not regret where you went wrong but learn from it. Learn from mistakes and never to let those mistakes stop you from loving again. Jesus never regretted loving us despite the pains. Those sacrifices He and we made is the true measure of how we love them. Keep on loving... Keep on believing.
@taz_dolly (93)
•
13 Nov 10
That is really truth some time we forget about it our self that why piece of advice love your self before loving other ok is 99% for our self 1% in other
@okkypratama (39)
• Indonesia
13 Nov 10
yes i agree with you .. if we love somebody, we always think about him/her. and probably we forget about ourself..
keep posting ^^
@chowee (517)
• Philippines
14 Nov 10
Precisely raynejasper!!!
love and pain are twins based from my observation!!!
you do not care yourself but instead you care for you partner
and that whats can love do to you..
you can only realized when things are already happen!!
so true!!!:(
Love can kill person??
@lxp188 (1)
•
13 Nov 10
In my opinion,happiness of person,most will love the people,especially know a love oneself,they know how to let oneself live better,much more happeniness and love to of course they also is very important,but it is certainly not the only,at any time they won't forget to love oneself is the first.
@timzbizz (5)
• United States
13 Nov 10
Rayne,
I wonder if the problem arises when we confuse ourselves with loving someone because you really do love them, unconditionally vs loving them to get love in return
@m310684 (35)
•
13 Nov 10
Yeah.. Sometimes, we forget who we really are, the standards, the convictions and the normal ways we do things, all because we fell in love with someone. We become selfless and silly. I should know, because I had been like that. I fell in love with one guy but for him I am just a friend. I had this crazy conviction that I might just become and old maid because I thought I would never love someone else. He broke my heart when he told me I am a "very good friend". Not that we tried to become more than that, but sometimes, when a girl falls in love, she doesn't mind if she knows her heart would eventually get broken.
@Sanitary (3968)
• Singapore
13 Nov 10
Yes, i fully agree! WHen we are really in love, we tend to give our best and all we have to the relationship. We will place their interest above ours, making sure they are happy. Real love needs no repaying because it involves feelings. Real loving of a person means protecting them, no matter what they have done, finding excuses on their behalf while placing all the wrong on ourselves when we are not even wrong in the first place.
That's true love for me, and it's rare.
@joysantos (131)
• Philippines
13 Nov 10
Yeah...I agree. Sometimes we give all we can. Even sacrifice our social life and happiness. But lets admit that we feel happy while giving them what they want. But we eventually get tired and find our happiness.
