Men usually support most of the expenses, isn't that cruel?

I think that is true, but is slowly changing. Men were responsible by default to take care of thier familys by default. Women were responsible to keeping the house clean, and raising the children. You can still see this is todays society, however I think things are really starting to change. Women are graduating high school, going on to Collage and having great careers. More women are working alongside thier husbands in todays society then ever before, and I think that is going to increase in the future. I personally am a stay at home mom. My husband works and provides for our family. So we have taken the stereotypical gender roles. However, we both agree that we dont want our kids in day care all day being raised by other people, so for us this is the best choice. Once our kids are more grown there is a very good possibility I will find a job, I do have a collage diploma. I may even try to open my own store online from home to make some extra money on top of my husbands salary. Right now my son is 9 months and very demanding though, but within the next year he will become alot more independant and I will have more time to myslef, which I may use to work from home, and online. I do think men feel stress and pressure to provide for thier families, but women feel pressure to do a great job with the house and children. I think a certain amount of pressure is ok and even healthy for a person, it keeps them moving in the right direction. Also my husband does not worry about giving me gifts or things like that. Maybe if we didnt have kids? But as long as the kids have what they need and our bills are paid I feel blessed and I would rather his time, then things that he can give me!

I think this attitude is slowly changing. In some cultures. Here in "Canadian" culture, women are expected to work and help support the family. And yet, when it comes time to have children, both women and the men often take paid leave (maternity and paternity) from work in order to be home for the child during the first two years. It is also becoming more acceptable for the man to stay home and play home-maker if the woman makes more money than he does. I think the idea of male responsibility and the subsequent stress involved is a personal choice nowadays, not a societal one... in some cultures, at least. For many families I know, the man makes more money than the woman does. So to be fair, the man pays out more than the woman does. In one household I know, the woman makes more money so she pays the bulk of the expenses, and that is fine with her husband. In another household I know, the woman makes half of what he does, so he pays ALL the expenses and she puts her money into a retirement account for them. All these situations work for the people involved, and I think that is what is important. Not how society, or other people, feel about their arrangement. I, like your boyfriend, have health issues that make it difficult for me to work in a normal setting. Because of this, I am trying to find a way to work from home. However, until this happens, I will continue to do what I have to do to to bring in an income. I don't think there is any need for you to feel guilty about working from home... unless there is a way that he can take your job and you go work long-hours outside the home. Or, if you can handle a part-time job outside the home while handling your home-based job, in order to take some of the stress off of him. In the end, it's what works for you guys. If he is having issues working so hard while you stay at home, that is something that you guys need to discuss and work around. If you guys can't come to an agreement, then maybe you just aren't a good enough match? I do have to ask: what if you weren't with him? Would he have to work just as hard as he does now? If the answer to that is: yes, he would have to work just as hard, then I don't see where the issue is. It's not like you are a burden on him. If the answer is no, he would NOT have to work as hard if he wasn't with you, then you ARE a burden on him. And you should get another job. One partner should never be a burden on the other when there is no medical cause for it. That is why he's called a partner. Not a care-giver. To reiterate: if the man or woman would have to work just as hard regardless, then it shouldn't matter what the other partner is doing. Of course, if BOTH partners are working just as hard, you have better potential for moving up in this world.

How about my sister friends. My sister is a public school teacher and she has a close friend who is married and has three male children. The husband is not working and is the one who is always in the house doing all the household chores. My sister pity her friend because she can feel her struggle and her sadness. To be honest it's not easy to be the head of the family when all the expenses will be put upon your shoulder all the time. I think both husband and wife should share the burden when it comes to financial aspect of the family.

i agree with you. i dont think that should be guys always supporting the expenses. is good that you and your bf both of you work to take the expenses. im sorry that he feels bad that his work only isnt enough for you to live happy. but is good that you are able to help him^^ if you ever feel a bit bad with the bills message me and i will tell you a site that pays 10 dollars a day if you do the work well^^ but need to be some hours online

My husband still goes to school to get his second degree which would help us build a better future. So now I'm earning for all of our expenses and this has been going on for the past 6 years of our married life. Money has never been an issue in our part and we're very supportive of each other. Some people might find it strange and some people might think badly of my husband, but we don't see anything wrong with it and our family is just doing fine.

Well life is cruel . Yes men think the support of the expenses in the family for their job ? what else can a man do for the family , we are not good with cleaning and taking care of babies , so whats left for us , if we cant do even that what are we for the family - a burden maybe ? [ Ofcors there are men that enjoy cleaning and taking care of the babies , but they are 1/50 so we talk general ] Its even more bad if you have health problems that stay in your path, you feel more useless and even more of a burden . Its not a bad thing for woman to work but that money to come as bonus not the family not to take all care of the bills and living .

Hi Suggar, It is really difficult to demolish te age old tradition. Men have been the food and shelter providers all through the ages. And that women are earning now is not a very old happening. Prior to that it was all men who would do all possible things to bear expenses for the family. If he failed the family perished. The same is there even today. And that if the woman earns more there is nothing that the male counterpart should feel bad about. If this be the case there is something wrong with the male.

Hello Suggar, About kidney stones, there is a way to pass them and it makes it less painful. My hubby had 5 of them and the first time, I thought he was going to die he was in SUCH pain and he's not one to complain. He had many apparently and as the doctor explained, most stones have sharp edges and thats what hurts. I found something that made him pass his stones and not damage the inside as they go thru the tiny tubes. I use marshmallow roots and parsley. The marshmallow roots helps to coat the inside so that when the stone moves around, it slips out easier. The parsley helps in the process of elimination. It works so well that the third stone was HUGE and the doctor said it might not pass through or would do a lot of damage. He told hubby to go sitting down as he might faint when it comes out. Well I made my special juice for him and everytime he had some pain (meaning it was moving around) he would jump on a small trampoline we bought just for that. In a few days, the stone came out. It didnt hurt and he didnt bleed. The doctor couldnt believe it. If you want to try my recipe add me as a friend and PM me and I'll send it to you. Now as for women staying home and having the husband work and pay for it all. I had that dream when I was a kid but it soon went away with the price of everything. Now nearly all couples both work as its too expensive. Have a nice day!

I think it is probably because women are the ones who give birth to babies and during those period of pregnancy women are more fragile and should be taken cared. I don't think its cruel for us guys to carry some of the burden since we also can't carry some of the burden women endure in life. I think we all have our roles to play and what really matters is that each of us do our part and support each other when one is in difficult situation.

While this is true, things are changing nowadays. With prices escalating, it is almost impossible to support a whole family with just one source of income. So the females are also now coming out to work to support the family. But this kind of arrangement, there is an underlying problems which I will leave it till another day.

I had a family communication class that mentioned something about men feeling good or better when they could support their households. I stay at home and my husband works but let me tell you that I don't expect these fancy things in life. He feels so much better about himself when he knows he can support all of the things we need in life. I try my best to budget that money to make it last. I really thank God that he puts it in both of us to make do with what we have. We also have 5 kids to raise. I have thought many times about working but there is always something that would make either one of us have to give up time to be there for the kids. For now we depend on God to get us through and help us make wise decisions.

It is a fact my dear friend that men should keep up with the family's daily expenses. That is why they were called head of the family. Their roles specifically is to provide, protect and pro-create. There's nothing cruel about it because we could also understand the pain of having a baby in your womb for nine months, the risk of giving birth and having to take care of the entire household everday. It's actually a balanced life. Working 8 hours a day plus quite a few times of overtime to add up in a day is just the same of cleaning the house, preparing meals, watching over your children, washing the dishes, clothes and so on the list. However, being a girl myself who works and earns more than bf my does, it has been discretion to keep up with his needs he can't really meet for I know he has tried but luck has not found its way on him. But I know later on in life if we get to be one family, the heavens will work for the both of us so he could take the lead while following him.

The world has indeed changed a lot. Men and women have equal responsibilities now although in a biblical sense GOD gave that role to men because of a curse way back Adam and Eve's time. Yet, Men aren't the only one who was cursed to responsibility, Women are ordained to be child bearers and caregivers. Doesn't women feel worse when they have miscarriage or when they lost a child due to sickness or by just not being there when there's a PTA meeting for their child. They DO. It is because it is their responsibility to take care of their children. Sure it's the husband's to, but as the norm and as the bible says, It is on the women's hands, so it's not that bad of a thing that your boyfriend feels helpless. It's his responsibility and its normal, at least he feels concern not being able to fullfill his job, he seems like a great guy unlike other guys who doesn't care at all.