Women stop doing this to your children!
By dreamy1
@dreamy1 (3811)
United States
February 20, 2011 7:29pm CST
I have a relative that is getting divorced and now his ex is trying to stop him from seeing his children. This makes me really mad. My relative is an excellent father in fact he was the one to do most things around the house. He was the one who cooked and cleaned and took care of the kids. His spouse was spoiled and a bit self centered and just because she is angry with him she wants to try to punish him by not letting him have access to the kids. 
Just because you are angry at your spouse stop taking it out on the kids! It's selfish and immature and it's doing more harm than good! Do you realize what you are doing? It might different if the dad is a deadbeat dad and doesn't care about his kids but if your spouse is a good loving father let them be with the kids.
I know it works both ways and men do this too but you hear more women doing this than men because women still get custody most of the time plus men don't tend to be as vindictive as women.
Unless you have really good reason to keep your children away from their fathers (abuse etc) think hard before you think you are punishing your ex by trying to stop them from seeing their fathers. You might be angry at them but it gives you no right to mess up the relationship with their children.
Just because you are angry at your spouse stop taking it out on the kids! It's selfish and immature and it's doing more harm than good! Do you realize what you are doing? It might different if the dad is a deadbeat dad and doesn't care about his kids but if your spouse is a good loving father let them be with the kids.
I know it works both ways and men do this too but you hear more women doing this than men because women still get custody most of the time plus men don't tend to be as vindictive as women.
Unless you have really good reason to keep your children away from their fathers (abuse etc) think hard before you think you are punishing your ex by trying to stop them from seeing their fathers. You might be angry at them but it gives you no right to mess up the relationship with their children.4 people like this
9 responses
@sender621 (14894)
• United States
21 Feb 11
When adults are having relationship problems, they should not pass this on to their children. Unless a father shows that he is unworthy, he deserves the right to be a father to his child. Taking this relationship from your children could change the course of their lives.
@changjiangzhibin89 (16533)
• China
21 Feb 11
They are divorced and take out their hostility on the children.It is inhuman.What example do they set to the children? ""example is better than precept.The spouse will reap the bitter harvest.
@tammytwo (4298)
• United States
21 Feb 11
I totally agree with you on this matter. At one point the couple loved each other enough to create children together. Even if that relationship happens to go sour and the couple feels they must part they should ALWAYS put the childrens' best interest FIRST.
What these women don't realize is that they aren't only hurting the men. The ones being hurt the most are the children. My husband and I have had our fair share of problems throughout the marriage and have even separated a time or two. But during that time I invited him to take the children as often as he wanted. Our relationship problems never made him a bad father. Therefore it was not my place to say he could not see HIS children.
@rsa101 (37966)
• Philippines
21 Feb 11
I think that the only solution to that one is asking the courts to allo him for visitation rights for his children. I think legally it is always the mother that gets the custody for the children. But in this case which I think is a rare one should be exceptional. I think if the father can prove that their mother is incompetent then court can give the father the sole custody of their children.
@jazel_juan (15747)
• Philippines
21 Feb 11
That is one selfish lady. If there is something wrong with her marriage, she should not deprive her kids of their father, me and my huby often get into a fight and we make it a point we do not drag our kids into the arguments and fights.
@JohnMach (550)
• Philippines
21 Feb 11
I know someone with the same problem. She's using the child as a revenge to her ex husband. That is wrong because instead of the child seeing both the parents, he is limited to just seeing his mother which is unfair. I'm just glad I'm happily married.
@dreamy1 (3811)
• United States
21 Feb 11
It definitely is punishing the children. I don't know why people can't see that. They are so blinded by their anger they don't realize what it really means when you do that. To say to a child you're never going to see your father again especially if that father loves you more than anything and is a good father that is devastating.
@macdingolinger (10386)
• United States
21 Feb 11
I never tried to keep my kid's dad from seeing them. Actually I encouraged him to take them. There was abuse but I didn't feel he would be that stupid to abuse them and he was usually with someone else when he had them. He moved in with his girlfriend pretty soon after our divorce and she was a great step mother to them.
