A Wolf is always a Wolf!!!

Philippines
February 23, 2011 12:50am CST
Sigh, I just received an email that says "He will never ever change. A wolf is always a wolf even if he hides himself under a sheep's skin." I believe that the sender was referring to my husband. Even if the sender was right, there is nothing I can do about it. I have given my husband countless chances. If he will ever break it again, even if I love our kids so much, it'll be the end of us. If he is still doing something that will hurt me and I'll eventually discover it (I believe that nothing in this world can be hidden), I will not ask for an explanation, I'll just pack my things and go quietly. I know that I can because I realized that I can no longer bear to go through all the painful stuff I had been through because of him... If he doesn't love me, so be it. If he doesn't respect me, so be it. I pray that God will make my kids all right and healthy so that by the time I can break free from the pain and misery, I won't have to worry that much about them. In the meantime, I have nothing else to do but to endure everything in silence. Do you really believe that a person is capable of changing from being bad to being good? I am afraid to hope and expect...
1 person likes this
24 responses
@saphrina (31552)
• South Africa
23 Feb 11
Hi sweetie. I have to say you have much more patience with that one than i will ever have. I won't tolerate such things at all. The first time mine do that to me, it's GOODBYE. They don't change sweetie. Sorry, but that will never happen. Once a cheater always one. Best of luck to you. TATA.
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
I have this kind of notion before that once he do such thing to me for the first time it will be goodbye but when you love the person very much you will always give chances. I am also in pain right now and while typing this I am crying because I have no one else to talk to. It's really hard to fake smiles in front of your family when you are breaking.
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Hi, Saphy. It is so nice to see you here again. It has been a while... This is my way of moving on with my life, dear. The only way is to forgive him. But, of course, with limitations. I do not tolerate him but for the sake of my peace of mind and peace in our household, i'd rather not think about it anymore. Besides, I find comfort in the fact that one day, God will give us what is due to us. If he is fooling around again, God will take care of him. He is the only person liable for all his actions. I've done my part. I can only pray that none of his misbehavior will back fire on our kids.I'll be very hurt and will never forgive him...Never....
@saphrina (31552)
• South Africa
23 Feb 11
Hi sweetie. I understand what you are saying and it breaks my heart to know that most men actually treat their loved one's like this. You cannot let that love make you turn a blind eye to what really goes on. That will break you for sure.
@jdyrj777 (6530)
• United States
24 Feb 11
I believe once a cheater always a cheater. Thats just the way that males are made. A woman that finds a male that is a 1 woman man is very rare and hard to find. Before you up and leave make possitively sure that it is true. Did you reply back to the sender of that email with questions? I see you are from the Phillipines do they have programs that help single parent with $$$ and food. You dont want to put your kids in poverty that many single parent live in. Unless theres a way to have him continue to support you and the kids i wouldnt advise you to leave untill the kids are grow. But get better education so when the kids leave home you are able to support yourself and leave him then.
@jdyrj777 (6530)
• United States
26 Feb 11
Yes, that is true maybe shey sent that email to try to get you out of the pic because your husband is not doing so quick enough for her. They say most men that fool around do not leave their families. However its a good thing you are aware of whats up and making plans for yourself. Have your ever heard of a movie called "Diary of a Mad House Wife". Or it could be "Diary of a Mad Black Housewife". You should try to watch it. But if you do watch it alone, or with a lady friend. Not your husband.
• Philippines
25 Feb 11
It is indeed a rare opportunity to find a one woman man nowadays. I'd consider that person as truly blessed if he/she got one in his/her life. I did not bother to reply. What is the use. It will only give that sender the pleasure of the thought that he/she had somehow gotten into my nerves. I will not give such person that satisfaction. Besides, what is the point? If he is referring to my husband, well, she/he is not in the position to tell if hubby has or hasn't changed yet. I am the only one to have the right to finally conclude such. I do have plans for myself, though, whether he will change or not, I will continuously search for a way to make my life and myself better. Not just for the kids but for myself especially. Thank you, dear for dropping your thoughts here. It is much appreciated.
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
@ Jdyrj I read a lot of malicious emails coming from a certain woman to my husband, but those were sent to his email address. However, this time , someone sent it to my own email address. I'm not sure if it was from the same woman. It could be or it could not be. Who knows? Well, I do not exactly know what the real score between my husband and the other woman because my husband would not admit that he had an intimate relationship with her. It's all up to him how to deal with it. Thanks for informing me of such movie. I am curious what is it all about. I'll definitely check it out.
@andy77e (5156)
• United States
24 Feb 11
Why do people get married if this is how things go?
@andy77e (5156)
• United States
25 Feb 11
There are? Where are these good men? Or since I'm a man myself, where are these good women? lol Sorry hon, I haven't met a good man or woman yet. I suppose they exist, but Lord only knows where they are hiding. :)
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
Oh, you see, I am a woman and I can honestly say , modesty aside that I am a good one. But perhaps, I am too good that my husband thinks that I can endure anything and anything with full willingness out of the goodness of my heart. Yes, dear. There are good women out there and they are not hiding. They will come to you when it is your time to meet them. You'll be shocked.
• Philippines
25 Feb 11
Because they THOUGHT they are ready to face everything that goes along with being married including faithfulness, loyalty and honesty to their spouses. Then, they realized, they aren't ready yet and wanted to do more than just being responsible husbands and fathers. don't worry, Andy. There are still some few good men out there.
@toniganzon (72413)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
There's nothing wrong in praying and hoping that somebody could change. However if it's done repeatedly even if that hope will come i believe that you don't have to be in misery and endure things. You are not the only one affected in this situation but your kids are too. I strongly support your decision that if he does the same thing again, it's time for you to pack your bags without saying a word. For me, there's only one thing that my husband can do to make me leave him and that is finding him in bed with another woman. That one mistake can end our married life forever and there's no turning back for me. I hope that your life would be much better and the kids too. Take care and good luck!
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Hello, Toni.:) Oh, Jesus... For me, that is too much! I am so bad in tolerating lies, dear. You can cheat on me but as long as you tell me about it, I will have no problem in forgiving you. But, to lie to me and compounded such lies with alibis and another lie.... I can't bear it. It will take forever for me to rebuild my trust. It will be like a ghost that keeps on haunting me from time to time. In fairness to my husband, I am giving him the benefit of the doubt. I'd like to believe and trust him that he indeed has changed for the better. Though sometimes, there is this woman's instinct in me that feels there is still something that he is hiding from me but, darn it! I'm too tired to know what it is. I am looking forward of the day when I will no longer worry about his lies and hiding things from me. What my husband doesn't understand is, I am strong enough to accept the fact no matter how painful or hard it is. I prefer the truth than mislead me with lies.... Sure thing, dear, ny life will be better and my kids', too. Wishing you the same, Toni.
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
@Staria: Hello. My husband also is clumsy when it comes to hiding things and lying that's the reason I found out about his little mis-adventures.
@staria (2780)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
I do not and cannot tolerate lies too!! Good thing my husband sucks in lying, he easily gets caught! :
26 Feb 11
Friend, I wish I could really answer you. But I can answer you this way. I have a married woman friend with children who didn't mind missing the finer things in life. If she did, she never told her husband. All she wanted so important in her life was to be a mother and wife, and make their children happy.She never wanted any than what she had.The husband always left her; she never complained. he never gave her flowers or gifts; if she minded, she never said so to her husband.Being took for granted was a thing she accepted. She didn't even seem to notice that he never kissed or held her. Then one day, the husband and the children awoke to read a letter left by their mother which said simply,"our kids are old enough, they don't need me very much, I'm gone in search for love I need so much.I have needed you so long, but I cannot go on all alone. Goodbye." Believe me, the husband cried, but then it was too late.
@mommyboo (13176)
• United States
28 Feb 11
So sad.... because I have a friend like that too. I believe that we as women and human beings need to treasure ourselves and treat ourselves kindly. We are deserving of love and affection and caring, and if we are not with someone who can willingly give it as well as accept it in return, are we not with the WRONG person? The thing is - nobody should ever suffer in silence. When things begin to break down, communication is key, you must TALK to the important people in your life. If you can fix anything, it has to be before you have accepted lack of love, lack of caring, lack of encouragement, lack of support. Once you have accepted that from your partner, either by letting it go or by actively ALLOWING it and never telling them what you NEED from them, then it's too late, if you try to fix it later they may come back at you and say 'well you never minded the other 110 times, how is THIS time any different?'. You matter, don't forget that. And remember that you and your partner are your childrens' role models. They will see how you behave and interact and that is their main source of what adult relationships are to them. Don't let them get the wrong idea...
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
Hello, Bengwayan. Thank you for sharing such story to me. Sigh... it made me cry. I can almost see myself in that woman. Yes, like her, all I ever wanted was to be a good mum and wife to my kids and husband, respectively. I gave everything for the relationship, gave up everything, too. Maybe, when the kids are old enough. like that woman you just told me about, I'll be searching for someone who could love me. My dear, I just love this story so much that I want this to post in my FB account. I hope you wouldn't mind.... I can not thank you enough, dear for sharing this to me....
28 Feb 11
Post it, please, and I hope that husband who who gave no meaning to the love and affection given by my woman-friend will see it and lament again. And I hope your husband will see your FB and realize the pain you are undergoing from his utter ruthlessness will open his eyes to reality -- if he ever will. Friend, it is good to cry. Crying is never a sign of weakness. It is a cleansing process and hope for a beginning. I wonder why we the men, disregard the little things in life that make a house a home -- until it is too late. Give my regards to your kids.
@QeeGood (1213)
• Sweden
23 Feb 11
Yes, a wolf is always a wolf. We can only make change with oneself. We can be receptive for what other people have to say about our own behaviour, what we do, what we say that cause other people pain and suffering. When we have come to the insight and the turning point with oneself, that we need to make a change we can do it. Sometime to make one realize it there mostly needs to happen something bad and hurtful. Many people take people for granted to stay in their lives no matter how bad their behaviours are until they get a wake up call losing it all definitely. It often happens when the people who is leaving has during many years in silence been suffering hard times,had had much patience, have been hoping the person to change, but it did not happened. I believe a person can change from bad to be good, but to make it to happen.... something has to happen to give that person a wake up call in ones being. It wont happen as long as people continue to stay with the bad person hoping and enduring the suffering. Take action... shake the world for the bad person ....to wake up!
@QeeGood (1213)
• Sweden
24 Feb 11
I have myslef been in a what it was called dysfunctional relationship/ marriage. where my at that time spouse had HIS behaviour, which was not appropriate as "normal" I gave him love and was like a martyr turning the other cheek enduring anything hoping for him to make a change. It did not happen until I got a divorce. He lost me and his biological child. After that it started a process in his own being. He needs to make changes. Sometimes I have noticed when you speak the same language do the same action as a man( a male do ) The man wake up a bit. I think it has to do that men are competitors with each other subconscious so they either feel beatened or they feel unsecure. When a man feels unsecure he get the serious feeling, " He " has to do something about it to get his comfortable situation back. I do hope you will get a healthier relationship / marriage.
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
Hi there again, QeeGood.:) I am sorry to hear your story. It must have been hell for you to went through those things.... I prayed that this thing will never ever going to happen to me and my husband. I'm not so sure if I am that strong to endure what you have been through. I don't want to put that much risk in my life just to save the marriage and make him see things the way I see them.:( But, I guess, you are right about men being competitive. Oh, I think I need to give him a bluff for sometime, even just a bit to see if he will feel threatened... Thank you for the well wishing, dear. I do hope ,too, that all things are well with your life now.:)
@dpk262006 (58650)
• Delhi, India
23 Feb 11
Hi Eureka! I am perplexed to read that what prompted the sender of the mail to send you such a mail. Was s/he your well wisher or otherwise? I think had s/he been your well wisher, s/he would have introduced herself/himself to you. You are right that you can do nothing concrete to change your hubby, you can endure and bear. I feel and I am afraid to say that a person's basic characterstics do not change, even if s/he changes outwardly. Some traits are inherent and imbibed very deeply in a person, which do not change even due to extreme external pressure or say circumstances. Still, one can hope for the best because it is said that our hopes keep us alive and we keep thinking that 'tomorrow will be a better day'. All said and done, if you reach at such a stage where you need to take a decision to pack up your bag, please think twice before moving and see and weigh all pros and cons beforing leaping.
@dpk262006 (58650)
• Delhi, India
24 Feb 11
Hi Eureka! I am happy to hear that you appreciated my comments on FB. For me too, it is always great pleasure to interact with you (through any channel). I vaguely remember that you might have told me that his girl friend knows your emails ID and your FB account. In that case - is she the sender of the mail? I said earlier also and I may reiterate that lying and cheating are negative traits and are not acceptablein a relationship. When one partner gets a felling that the other one is a habitual liar, it is not good for a strong bonding and it gets difficult to cement the releationship. Even if the fellow with a tag of a 'liar' tells a fact with honesty and truth, that 'fact' is seen with a suspicion. He loses his good image. On the other hand telling the truth helps, in my view. Truth may look bitter at the first instance, however, it helps in the long run. It is good to hear that he is 'changing' and for the past few months he is apparently 'behaving' as a responsible partner. As regards 'complete change', you should not expect that. Even if he changes himself to say 50%, you should try to accommodate him. Remember, I always say that even the 'best partner' in this world will have some negative traits. I do hope that your threat of 'last chance' prompts him to 'change' for betterment of your family. All the best! Deepak
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Hi, dear.:) Oh, thank you for the comments in my FB. I love interacting with you there. I enjoyed it. Remember when I told you that his girlfriend knew about my email addresses and my fb accounts as well as the fb account of our daughter? Did I tell you about those, dear or I did not? Sigh... i guess she was right. My hubby will never ever fully changed his ways. One way or another he will be lying to me again. It is in his character and a very bad habit that is so hard to break. But, I am already prepared to facing that. If he can not change then, I will. Change in the way I feel for him. I must admit that he is still very much the father of my kids and in fairness to him, he is a good provider when it comes to their needs. After the talk we had on the new year's eve of 2011, I haven't seen him do the same things that really hurt me .Though there are still certain things I hope he'd somehow realize how important those thing to me are and be sensitive enough, I can not expect him to change overnight nor change the way things are right now, maybe, he will, maybe he won't. No one is planning to do a leap, dear. I have given him one last chance. One last chance is all he got because unlike before, I have no plans about 'me' because the kids were still small, but now that they have grown , I do.:) Thank you as always. Your words are such a comfort, dear.
1 person likes this
@lhenpaule (495)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
As i read this, an old story crossed my mind. I am once in the same situation. In those time, my relationship with my husband is like a prison cell where the only solution is to get out and be freed. For more than a decade now, i was able to survive the difficult and hard times of rearing children all by myself. Thanks be to God and support of my family.
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Hi Lhenpaule. Then, I'm not going to say sorry for your situation but rather congratulations for passing through the painful stage and coming out victorious at the end. As for me, I do not want that to happened to me and my kids especially. I have been in a relationship and my two kids suffered from it, I can no longer put the other two under the same situation. For now, I haven't seen him cheating on me and I'd like to believe that he has changed indeed. If he is still doing those things again, I know God will not allow me to be a fool again. HE will be the One to shed light. This is what I believe:What you are doing in the dark will be revealed in the light.. God is with me. :)))
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
I hope and pray that things will always be well for you and your children. I salute you for being strong and standing to what you believe in .
@minnie15 (143)
• United States
24 Feb 11
You poor thing. I know this is very difficult for you. I had been through a similar situation as you about three years ago. There are a couple of things you need to ask yourself. Is what he did forgivable and is he showing signs that he changed? Are you and the kids better off if you were to leave...you have to think about financially as well. Sometimes we are faced with hard decisions like this. You must love yourself. You should not have to spend your life in silence because of his indiscretions. If he isn't showing signs that he is better, I would move on. You take care of yourself and your kids. Sometimes we have to be strong even if we really don't want to. Good luck.
• Philippines
25 Feb 11
Oh, I want to be strong, not just for my kids but for myself as well. We had issues in the past but we already talked about it. He was sorry and promised not to do it again. So far, i haven't seen anything unwanted about his behaviors ever since but of course,there are still things I hope he'd truly change soon. This letter was untimely. Too late as a warning because I have given my husband another chance. Anyways, he (hubby) is doing his best to be the best father to my kids. That is something I feel grateful and can be happy of. Never mind if he is into womanizing. There are just too many women and they are getting younger everday. Let my husband satiate his cravings for mis-adventure. LOL . Honestly, I'm done with all the crying. I'm happy thinking that i am finally free from such pain and stress.:) Thanks, Minnie. all the best to you, too.
@ybong007 (6645)
• Philippines
25 Feb 11
Always remember that the only permanent thing in this world is change. So don't lose hope.
• Philippines
25 Feb 11
You are right, Ybong. I believe that everything is constantly changing. Oh, I'm not losing hope, my dear. That person had absolutely under estimated my capacity to adapt to any situation. Besides, the only thing that I want to see changing is not from my husband's end but from my end. It is the way to deal with his unchanging behaviours.
@bounce58 (17390)
• Canada
26 Feb 11
I believe in giving people second chances. People naturally make mistakes. But if they choose to leave their past and make ammends, then they deserve a new lease in life. Then the wolf could become a sheep. Your resolve is admirable. People may see it differently, if you don't want confrontation and just choose to avoid stress. But I think I would do the same if I were in the same situation. I wish you better days.
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
Hi, Bounce. Thank you for dropping your candid thoughts about this matter. I'm glad that you understood my situation. I can not do much but to always give him a chance. It is not easy to give up on someone who used to be the man you loved so much and the father of your kids whom you love more than life itself... I'm sick and tired of confrontations ,dear. It is not doing me nay good because I can not seem to make my husband see my point. I am just hoping that one day a wake up call will come and he will see the way I see things or I will see things the way he sees them (just in case I am the one who is wrong).:(
@bokal2703 (802)
• Philippines
25 Feb 11
Everyone deserves a chance...and sometimes, it isn't just second chances but a lot more. Just like you, I want to believe that a person is capable of improving himself and changing for the better. In your case even if it turned out that your husband is still a "wolf" despite the countless chances that you have given him, then at least, you know, within your heart, and himself too, that you tried and didn't give up on him easily..I wish you well..I hope he will prove to be the sheep that was actually just hidden in a wolf clothing for a long time....
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
Hi there, Bokal.How are you? It has been awhile since the last time I 'saw' you. You are right ,dear. I guess, I can give him another chance again and again, until the day I have nothing to give anymore. How can I just give up on the father of my kids? Even if he tainted the love and such love had waned , I love my kids so much that I can sacrifice my own happiness in exchange of giving them a family they can call whole and seemingly 'happy'. Yes, I am doing everything I could so that if ever one day, my efforts will all turned into nothing, my husband can say that I did really try. And that I will not regret and think of what could have been if I did try harder. I hope that the sheep in him will over power the wolf that has been domineering him for such a long time. Have a great day, dear.
• United Arab Emirates
24 Feb 11
life always gives chances but not as much as u have given already, and this is the time to move on to your life and get relief from the pain he has been giving you, i dont know whats all about behind the story but definetly i would say that life without love is possible but never without respect, thats my personal experience may be some of you dont agree with me but having said different peopel have different perpective of life because of goign thorugh several phases of life; pain happines sorrows regrests and all that makes them to see people in a realistice way. so time to see your self in this life...
• Philippines
25 Feb 11
Hi there, Mezsalman. I am not saying that I am a martyr but I am in a position where in a value family much more than I value my own happiness. I guess, I will never stop giving chances to any of the member but of course, I have to get a life of my own ,too. Right now, i am in the process of looking things in a different point of views. If my hubby doesn't want to change then, I believe it is me who should adapt to a better situation. I do have plans for myself and I vow to carry them on whether he changes or not.
• United States
24 Feb 11
I do believe a person is capable of changing from bad to good but the chances are slim. The person may at first be a better person but sometimes the person may be tempted to change back to its ways little by little. Then they change again but revert to its old ways. If your husband is not in the process of doing anything bad to you right now then don't worry. Just believe that everything is alright and that you and your husband are fine.
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
I never lose hope to the capabilities of the human race to change and do good for themselves and to others as well. My husband deserves a chance, even if it means again and again. How can I just turn my back from someone who is the father of the kids whom I love so much? I know that my husband is doing all the best he can do to make the marriage work. So, I am in. May be, we can just make things work, just once...
• United States
27 Feb 11
I hope the best for you and your husband. I hope that he doesn't hurt you in the future. I'm glad that you're looking in the best interest of your kids. Kids need both parents around in the house. Wish you all the luck :)
@ebuscat (5936)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Yes it is that way so keep not go to the bad animal of that.
• Philippines
24 Feb 11
I am keeping myself from a safe distance.:) Thanks you from dropping your thoughts here. Have a great day.:)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Hi eureka.I just hope you are feeling better right now.Pain is always part of a relationship. Maybe only few men are given with pure heart and loyalty by God, but whatever His reasons we cannot question Him. I responded some of your discussions before about this matter and reflected some of it because I was also in pain before and I've learned a lot from it. I was even happy upon hearing that your husband is back. If he is the one ask for it, then he should be responsible for all his action. All I can tell you is don't anticipate him to change, because you will be hurt more if you expect too much from him to change. And also you will never have a peace of mind and always feel insecure. If he change then that's good. But one thing I want you not to give up is never ever quit on praying to God that he will be a better husband to you. Prayer is the most powerful thing. And it can heal your pain. Live life happily. Stay smiling.Be strong always for your kids.
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Hello, Mac. Yes, I remember you responded to my discussions. And i owe some insights from you, too.:) I talked to him on new year's eve. T'was break it or make it moment and he was sorry and promised to not to do it again. How can I be so hard on the father of my kids? I had stayed with him on the worse situation, so why not give him a chance to improve? Not for me but for my children's sakes. I do have learned not to expect. Matter of fact, I'm just letting him do whatever he wants. And I promised myself never ever ask him again. If he want to tell me something he has to have the courage and initiative to come to me and share his thoughts. If he is hiding things again, God will take care of that from now on. My concentration is my kids and myself. I can not waste any more time on his misbehaviors. Thank you, Mac. I believe in the power of prayer, too. Thanks for reminding me of that. I do hope that your are also living your life happily, always smiling and strong. Whatever you went through before, I believe, you already got over it.I'm happy for you.
@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
Hello friend! Nice to see you again but sad to know about your situation again. As to your question,I do believe everyone is capable of changing "only if" the persons wants to change for the better. It's a big difference between "you" wants him to change and "he" will just change because you want him too. If he decides he wants to change because he wants to as for his own will,then I could say,there's a big possibility that he will. I am really not in a position to advise anything to you when it comes to the problem of your relationship as I haven't experienced it yet,I believe I could be more of an effective adviser if I know how it feels but I do feel for you.. My advise is just to focus on your kids alone as what you are doing now and pray. I just hope my friend next time you post a discussion here,I would be seeing the good news about your relationship with your hubby. Miss you friend! Haven't seen you for a while even on triond.
@sy0712 (155)
• China
24 Feb 11
That proves the saying goes,a leopard can not change his spots,most of the time,no matter how he conceal,his nature will still casual come to light up,I think you have no need to continue to endure,you are brave when you must be brave!
• Philippines
27 Feb 11
Hi, Syo. Oh, that. Yes, our true color and nature will always show up no matter how hard we try to hide it. But, i'd like to give my husband the benefit of the doubt. I wanted to see him as the sheep overpowered by a wolf (for the meantime) and that one day, he will see what he truly is, and that is a sheep. For the love of my kids, I'm willing to give my other hand though he already have taken the first one. And I should be very brave for this one, for the last time... Have a great day, dear.
• Philippines
23 Feb 11
I'm afraid that they are right. You need a miracle for that to happen. He will never change. Just recently I have a coteacher who left her husband for good. The reason was she had been enduring all the heartaches; the verbal and physical abuse she had experienced in his hands. The reason why she was still holding on for the past several years was because of the children. But it all came to an end when they had a fight and her husband tried to stab their son. That was the time when she came to her senses. I thought they were so close. They don't look like they ever have a fight. But she told us that we were wrong. She'd been sacrificing for a man who is lazy and is a drunkard. I'm glad she took the kids with her.
• Philippines
24 Feb 11
Hello, Hemlockspruce. Jesus.... God forbids that to happen to me and my family. So far, my husband has not hurt my physically and though there were times he called me names but because he was so angry, he was sorry after. He is not as worse as the husband of your colleague. Only, he had lied to me in the past. We talked about it , on the new year's eve of 2010 and he promised to change. so far, I have not seen anything suspicious or anything that is similar to his misbehaviors ever since. So I guess, I am still ok. That is the very thought of the mail sender and somehow part of me is telling that it is true. Butthe other part is also nudging me to give him another chance. So, I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt. Let's see is he will change. Besides, I am no longer scared. I am prepared of whatever the outcome maybe. I already got plans for myself and my life, plus, the kids are grown ups already. Just one more chance.:)
@embabes (17)
24 Feb 11
personally hun, i do believe people can change but what you need to ask yourself is are you willing to trust that he will... you need to sit down talk to him, explain how you are feeling before you just leave. give him a chance to explain and tell the truth then you act after you have heard him out, im not saying put up with the things he does wrong simply explain to him the thing he is doing wrong and if he doesnt change then you need to decide what is best for YOU xxx
• Philippines
24 Feb 11
Hello, Embabes. CAn I ask you something? What does "hun" means to you? Please answer me because this will going to answer one of those nagging questions I have here. We sat down and talk. TRhough it was informal but I believe I was able to deliver the message to him clearly, that I am resenting and will no longer tolerate his misbehaviours. And yes, you are right. Since I decided to give him another chance I might as well do my best to really believe that he will indeed change his ways, though not all but at least some which is attainable. I have plans for my future ,too, but I am giving him this one last chance and see what happens next.