Questions people ask

United States
March 2, 2011 6:11pm CST
I am disabled and unable to work. After two attempts to return to work ended with me in the hospital I have given up and given in to the fact that I can no longer hold down a job. The one thing that really bothers me is a particular question I seem to be asked frequently: "What do you do all day?" I get immediately defensive and feel like I have to defend myself even though I'm not sure what it is I am defending. It's not like I was given a choice and I chose to have a rare genetic disease that is difficult to manage and live with. Just wondering if anyone else gets that question and how you respond?
1 person likes this
3 responses
@sallyj (1228)
• United States
3 Mar 11
Yes I know that people are narrow. They do not see but what they want to see. I too am disabled and get some pretty strong opinions. They are so narrow minded, but guess who is the worst when they get a simple cold.
• United States
3 Mar 11
One of these days I hope to think of a real good comeback that will stop them in their tracks!
@sallyj (1228)
• United States
4 Mar 11
I hope so. Please let me know what it is.
• United States
5 Mar 11
I will!
@KrauseHome (36748)
• United States
11 Mar 11
Personally I can relate with this one, as I have been on Disability before and it can be a hard thing to try and defend yourself and allow yourself to not want to give up. Right now I am going thru something that makes me think being on Disability might be a thing to consider even if I seem healthy to most around me as well. I am sure there are things you have found in life you can do, and must enjoy doing, Maybe you need to find a way to focus on those more and make them your positives so you have something to show for your time, and not worry about what others might think or feel as well. Being disabled is not always easy and sometimes can really get you down, but I know that if you learn to keep focused one day looking back it will be no real big deal for you as well.
• United States
11 Mar 11
Thanks for your input. I'm sorry you are having struggles right now and I wish you the best. Some days it seems pretty easy to stay positive and focused and other days not so much. On those days it doesn't take much for something to get to me. On the good days I have a hard time understanding why I let some things bother me. I have survived many things, I will survive this also and hopefully one day my experiences will help others.
@sam3m1 (190)
• United States
10 Mar 11
i think the answer you might give would depend on what you want to convey to the questioner. Eg., not as much as you do, i'm sure..or TV, eat candy, anything i want, really..or i'm studying nuclear physics..or you can do the same thing, just get what i have. but, you shouldn't be defensive especially if the questioner is implying that you're just being lazy. if that's the case, the person doesn't deserve an answer.
• United States
11 Mar 11
I really haven't figured out what is being implied when I am asked that question. I guess I do get defensive because I certainly don't do what I'd really like to be doing and I have enough trouble with feeling useless myself without anyone else adding to that feeling. You are right that they don't deserve an answer if they are implying I am just lazy. Thanks!