He still wants to marry me!

this story awfully sounds like mine. really it does... i really wish you a lot of courage now, patience, and understanding. so just to give you an idea of how i worked it out. we met online, so basically we are in an ldr. then he would always tell me that i should promise him i would not leave him no matter what. i was laughing at him and told him its as if there's something that i need to know. he said there's nothing he needs to work on, and he promises he will never leave me. so after a few months, we finally met and surprisingly he lives quite near our place before he left for abroad. so anyway, all along i was having this instinct that something is really wrong. i didnt know... until he left...and i had to learn of the truth from his friend. so we never had the chance to talk about it in person which made it even harder for me.so i confronted him and even told him i want to break it off since i felt that everything we had were based on lies. he just asked from me a lot of patience and time. but for almost a year now of constant communication and having strong faith in the relationship, we are still together. mylot is a witness to my relationship's up and downs. so here are the more important things you need to ponder on: - if you feel something's wrong,even if you dont have proper bases, then something is really wrong. never take your instinct for granted. it leads you right on. - dont be afraid to ask him. but since he's too afraid to talk it out with you, dont lose your patience. whats the reason i was given when i asked my bf why he didnt tell me his situation? he said he was afraid to lose me right then and there and he doesnt want to see me sad that very moment. - there have been countless times i almost gave up on him. thats when i realize how much i really love this guy because i always find myself getting back with him. during those gray times, i always want to yell at him for giving me much of heartaches even problems. but i cant. its normal for you to feel really bad, dont hold back the angry feeling but dont take it on him too. you might regret having said a lot of bad things. what i do is, i try to be very rational and think a lot of times. when im angered, i tell him i need some time off like a week so i can 'recharge' my patience and it is only after that given break that i will talk to him. durng those days, write him a letter of everything you hate about what happened, everything you wish to tell him. but dont send it. its a way to relieve yourself off all the stress the situation has caused you. cry it out. but thats just for the week. gather your thoughts and tell him everything he needs to know, but please dont argue with him. your goal here is to find answers to what you need to know. again, be very patient. - which ingredient i believe is the key to a real peace of mind? not having to think much of what others have to say.oftentimes others' say blurs out the beautiful things you got in the relationship. just believe he has his reasons why he doesnt want you to know YET. my bf once told me, after too much whining i did, that i should also remember the little but happy moments we had and not just the bad ones. - but dont overdo it. give the whole situation a timeline, i dont want to say a due date. if this goes on way too long, like for 2 years already, i guess you have to leave. - if things dont go the way you wished they were, charge it to experience that some lessons in life are really meant to be learned the hard way. oh i wish i checked on your age first before i posted my response. anyway, patience, understanding, and a lot of courage are what you really need now to get by. you'll be fine just dont think too much. you'll never know in time that everything was made for a reason.

If the both of you are meant for each other then you are really meant to be. Just gave your boyfriend a time to settle things. Just be calm and try not to think of him so that you can appreciate your life.

I know you love him and you want to be with him but I'd do it only if he were willing to open up and be truthful and if it were more on your terms and if he is more willing to give in and be more open to you and more honest to you. A relationship can not work on half truths. It can not work when he only tells you what he thinks you needs to know. And it will not work with him holding things back from you and with him giving up on you when he feels like it. He either trusts you with his all or he does not trust you at all. He loves you enough or he does not. It's that simple. For him to put you through what he has put you through is totally uncalled for. I would not stand for this again. If he did anything like this again then he would be gone and there would be no turning back at all. Also, he must commit to a date of getting married and hold to it. Another thing, he has a problem and "WE" will work together on that problem and he will hold nothing back. Either he trusts you or he does not. In a marriage there is no holding anything back. He is taking you and forsaking all others. You are compromising, but he must compromise too. Marriage and a relationship is a two way street. It's not for one person to do all the giving or all the taking. He must give as well. You must not be of the mind set that he is the man and you have to give in all the time. That you have to compromise all the time. Please realize that you are a person and you have been giving in so much. From what I have read that you have been the one giving in and you have been the one giving. He has to give and share and compromise as well. It is a partnership with each one giving as close to 50/50 as they can. Please try to remember this. I wish you the best and I hope this works out for you. For you and him. Let me know how you are getting on.

I haven't read your previous post related to this but I think if he really went out of his way to talk to you and try to make you understand his predicament (though he hasn't said anything specific about it) I think that he is worth waiting for. I didn't have much luck in that department but I have witnessed my friends' relationships building the same way as yours did. They waited for each other until the perfect time came where everything was all right and they were able to do everything that they wanted - including getting married - without restrictions or anything that might hold back their relationship. Patience certainly is the key. And, since he was man enough to be raw and honest with you, I think he is sincere about wanting to marry you in the future. It is rare to find a guy that serious or open about their feelings for someone nowadays. So I guess all you have to do is to pray for strength and patience that you'd be able to hold on until he is ready.

Sometimes our imagination runs wild and it ruins our relationship. However, if you feel this strongly, it might be true and all you need is to prepare yourself. So, when the things he has to tell hurts you, you are prepared. Or when it will amuses you, you will be prepared. Or when it will change they way you look at him, you will also be prepared.

One thing though that makes me wonder too, is why would he not want you to know about it. Maybe you could help him. Isn't telling you about it, a part of being honest to each other? Well, if we truly love a person, we should be forgiving. And to be able to forgive, one has to know the background of things. Only then, could we forgive completely and unconditionally.

The teenagers are always worried if he/she is loved or not. Love is exciting and happy, but love is also poignant. To be frank with you, love may not be the happiness of the whole life. Time and the environment may change everything. If you love a person, it's OK. To see if he/she love you or not, let the time to check this. If you are absorbed in your job or your hobbies, and when your love is not your whole of your life, then you can face your love and know if he/she love you or not, and if you love him/her or not. If you just stand here to suspect if he/she love you or not, you cann't get anything and just destroy this love. This is just my opnion.