A complicated situation.. What do you think about this??

@mr_pearl (5036)
India
March 27, 2011 3:47pm CST
Hello myLotters... Here is a complicated situation in my office.. There isn't just one... lol... But today, I wish to discuss this one. A friend of mine who is extremely good looking 'dude'- as they call it, got mixed up with a girl who has left the office before a couple of months. Now, before going further let me explain he looks like a greek God. He is perfect and wanted by every lady. The looks and his happy-go-lucky nature makes him something of a Cassanova... The girl in question has recently broke up with her long time partner and single, by all means.. What happened is, I am sure you have guessed that, they chatted online and things got a little further on the chatting only. They even got to proposing to one another and thinking about dating etc.. Common occurance, eh??? But something makes it really uncommon... Your opinion is valuable, please share... The brother of that girl is the Best buddy of my friend. So everything was going good until before some time. When he suddenly realised and remembered her brother. And there was such a look of confusion n annoyance on his face. He could not find words to explain his own behaviour to me. He thinks that he is betraying his best friend by going around with his sister.. They haven't gone out yet, but he already thinks that he has committed some sin... What do you think about this??? Is it alright to have an affair with your best friend's sister?? Do you have any such experience???? What would you do in such circumstances???
2 people like this
10 responses
• Philippines
28 Mar 11
There is nothing wrong abouta guydating hisbestfriend's sister. Whatperhaps makes this situation a little complicated is the guy's image of being a cassanova which if in case is true, might most likely be of knowledge to his bestfriend. It would be alarming of course for the bestfriend if the guy would be dating his sister if he won't get any assurance from the guy that he is serious about her. Messing around with the sister clearly means messing around with the bestfriend. Perhaps the guy would like to avoid such a complication or perhaps he's not really serious. Playing around with your bestfriend's sister is never a good idea.
@mr_pearl (5036)
• India
28 Mar 11
I believe you have understood the situation correctly... That is how it is.. .He will not mess with her.. He will not cheat, wouldn't want to, I mean..But with his looks he sometimes gets carried away and gets mixed with other ladies... And that is the reason for worries.. .
• Philippines
28 Mar 11
I guess so, even if wouldn't want to play around and you would want to het serious with this girl, it would be very hard to do so if you are already branded as the cassanova. but is branded as someone who does, the stigma is still there. Proving your sincerity to the girl is already difficult and proving the same to your bestfriend who knows you very well who happens to be the brother o the girl you are eyeing is a lot more harder. It will take a lot of hard work. The stigma is still there and it does lead to a lot o complications.
@dawnald (84213)
• Shingle Springs, California
28 Mar 11
I don't see anything morally wrong with dating your friend's sister. But keep in mind that he does run the risk, if it doesn't work out with the sister, that he may lose the friend over it.
@mr_pearl (5036)
• India
28 Mar 11
Hi Dawn, you really see the picture clearly.. You probably picturised the vague fears clearly... Thanks... I guess I need to talk to my friend... Thanks agian..
@elvieb02 (696)
• Philippines
28 Mar 11
i don't see it as a problem because they are both single and available. if the brother is the problem, i think he shouldn't be, as long as they will not keep it as secret to the brother, because if they do, then that means they are doing bad things. and if the brother gets angry, they should explain that it's actually good because the guy is his best friend and he knows him, not just some unknown guy, who will date his sister.
@mr_pearl (5036)
• India
28 Mar 11
That is a pleasent idea... Thanks.. I'll try to highlight that with my friend and the girl.. Hopefully, this will get somewhere..
@cream97 (29151)
• United States
28 Mar 11
Hi. mr_pearl. If this guy is being true to his own sister, then there is nothing wrong with him pursuing a relationship with her. If he is cheating on her with another woman or a man, then the best friend of his should be upset. Most of the time, the best friend will confront the cheater, so I hope that this never happens.
@mr_pearl (5036)
• India
28 Mar 11
He will not cheat, most certainly... But with his looks he might get carried away... Ladies are after him, all the time.. And I guess, he isn't matured enough to deal with that. He is only 22... He lost his previous relation because of this one reason...
@sid556 (30987)
• United States
28 Mar 11
I really don't understand the problem in dating a best friends sister unless he plans on treating her badly. I don't understand why it should be even an issue. I dated my best friends brother in highschool and then years later after my divorce and while it didn't work out, she's still my best friend and her brother is still a very good friend.
@mr_pearl (5036)
• India
28 Mar 11
He really doesn't have any plans to cheat the girl.. But you know with his looks, he easily gets carried away... Other ladies and girls, I have seen, are always after getting him... That is how his previous relations were broken.. You see the problem, now..
• Philippines
28 Mar 11
If no one is owned by anyone, no one is committing any sin. That's how I understand it.
@mr_pearl (5036)
• India
28 Mar 11
Well... I admit the point. No one is owned by anyone, true... But still there are some complexities here in my country which are going to be a trouble...
@louievill (27485)
• Philippines
28 Mar 11
hi friend, I think cleanliness of intention and pureness of heart will judge the situation and your friend's course of action, it's simply that simple
@mr_pearl (5036)
• India
28 Mar 11
I agree with you... Thanks a lot for putting it in a simple n understandable way... Have a good day!
• United States
27 Mar 11
There is nothing wrong with him dating the sister provided he is not a bad guy. His friend would be happy to see him taking good care of his siter if this was te case. I think he may have had a realtionship with the est friend n secret if this relationship bothers him so much. that would be the only other thing to stop him.
@mr_pearl (5036)
• India
27 Mar 11
I understand ... Thanks a lot... I will share this with my friend... He is a decent fellow of course... But there are complications.. Your post has been valuable for me to find out something... Thanks again!!!! :)
• Philippines
28 Mar 11
If no one is owned by anyone, no one is committing any sin. That's how I understand it.
• Philippines
28 Mar 11
If no one is owned by anyone, no one is committing any sin. That's how I understand it.