Talking to a Rude Person

Marikina, Philippines
May 3, 2011 10:43am CST
Is it okay for you to talk someone who is rude? What I mean is that person is very rude when he talks, but still this person is kind and has a good heart. It is just this person born to be that way. I have met some members in other forums who are rude when they talk, but if you get to know them better, you'll realize that they are just born that way --- they born that way since birth. I mean, they talk natural but for some of us would think that they are rude. Have you ever encounter a person who is rude? How can you handle those person that are rude but for them are just natural?
1 person likes this
14 responses
• Philippines
4 May 11
rude people - they should at least show respect
Hello Introvertshy, I don't even want to see or smell them to be honest, i can't stand rude people. i don't think any one was born rude unless they chose to be that way or had the experience that led them to be rude people. there's so many rude people in the world, but they have a choice not to be rude. probably i had some rude friends too but they ain't my friends anymore since one of them actually stab me here in mylot.
• Canada
4 May 11
I don't entirely agree with this. OK, it depends what you mean by rudeness. Maybe they're not obeying etiquette that nobody ever taught them. I think part of the point of etiquette is to exclude "undesirables" who didn't come from posh families and didn't get taught it or just didn't come from your culture or clique. I don't think people with Asperger's syndrome can help it. I'm not sure where to draw the line between Asperger's syndrome and bad social skills, which may also be genetic.
• Canada
4 May 11
If you're saying or doing things that some people strongly disagree with. Those people may feel that they have little choice but to voice their objections or even resort to legal action of violence.
@allknowing (85963)
• India
4 May 11
It is like taking a stroll in a garden filled with flowers but there is a corner for thorny plants too. Dealing with rude people is like going through those thorny plants in the garden. No one would want to do it unless one has work there. I would only want to deal with rude people if it is for my survival.
• Canada
4 May 11
I like cacti! I know not all thorny plants are cacti and not all cacti have spines. Then most people like roses and they have thorns.
@allknowing (85963)
• India
5 May 11
Nice observation Grap... There are people who also like rude people!
@kalav56 (11497)
• India
3 May 11
THe normal excuse given by rude people is that they have a good heart.EIther they give the excuse or their loved ones provide the excuse.Now tell me please! Is someone ever born with a tainted heart? I would like to have less to do w ith the rude person. I prefer to avoind them if I can.If I have to I ll have to work somehow round them and this is difficult.
• Canada
4 May 11
I somebody ever born with a tainted heart? Well that's a very good question that's difficult to answer. What's nature and what's nurture? People have been arguing about that for a long time? I've certainly known families with several kids who were mostly OK but one was a complete scumbag. Maybe a passing pedophile abused the future scumbag but not the other kids? However I think it's likely that the scumbag has some genetic problem or suffered brain damage during birth or something. I also think the nurture vs nature debate has gone on so long because it's largely studied by psychologists who don't understand genetics.
@kalav56 (11497)
• India
5 May 11
Genetic physical or mental disorders are incurable and the person is to be pitied. But in society rudenss is not easily excused Graptopetalum and if a person has to get along in this life he has to tone down his rudenss whether it is 'nature 'or 'nurtured'.People just get away with hurting other people by their rudeness and family may tolerate it but others definitely don't.
• India
3 May 11
Well talking to Rude persons is a very big challenge. If you tend to make them anger by putting your thoughts then probably you are making the tea too hot to drink. Dealing with such persons i think that these people aren't born that way, it is just the society and the situation that makes them rude, true that some people are born angrily but if we are kind hearted and talk lovingly then the person in front have two choices either then can be rude to you or can give back the loving nature and smile in the same way we gaved them. When they talk in a rude way always keep in mind, that it is their nature and its not their mistake too. We should try and tolerate people and treat them nicely and understand them after all understanding is the key to any sort of relationship
• Canada
4 May 11
I've known some people who use rudeness as a way to be friendly and see being rude back as you being friendly. The hardest people to deal with are those who deserve criticism but also have a short fuse.
@MsTickle (25051)
• Australia
10 May 11
For some people it just might be the way they are. They may have grown up with that sort of talk and this is just what is natural for them. It's all relative though isn't it? Some people may not be worried by the way someone talks but someone else might take great offence. What might be considered rude in one culture may be perfectly acceptable in another. I once dined with a Sicilian family and the meal was salad, pasta and sauce and on another plate, the meat. The pasta and sauce is eaten with a fork, the meat is eaten with the hands and the sauce from it goes everywhere...all over the face and all over the hands. They use serviettes or table napkins to clean up then they eat the salad. I was horrified lol. Eventually, I became used to it but I always chose to use a knife and fork.
@SIMPLYD (90658)
• Philippines
6 May 11
Can you please elaborate what rude means to you? Does it mean that when the person speaks he is full of vulgarity? Or he is rude because he just butt in even when someone is still trying to explain?
• Philippines
4 May 11
Talking to a person who talks 'rudely' is inevitable. There's nothing we can do to do away with them. I admit, I myself talk 'rudely' at times. I think the best way to deal with them is just to ride on to their 'rudeness' and be a bit sarcastic. LOLJK! :p
4 May 11
Move to Korea. The people seem rude, but they are actually nice. I have been here 4 years and thought I would never understand the rude behavior., especially the older people. It's an oxymoron because they have a Confucianism based culture, which embraces kindness and tolerance. What might come across as rude, perhaps is just the way we perceive social communication based on what we learned growing up. I don't think there is a gene for rudeness., if so, I want to know.
@0310mg (73)
• Philippines
4 May 11
When I have read this, I really laughed. I do have a friend who sounds rude when he talked or answered questions and knowing that he's a holy man, a priest. I think some people are really like that, and it's up to us if we'll get use to it or leave them behind and quit with the friendship.
@r3jcorp (1383)
• Philippines
4 May 11
I don't like talking to rude people. I usually ends up the discussion if I find the person rude or just signifies that I'm not interested anymore.
• Canada
3 May 11
its not someone being born rude. they wer brought up to be rude even if it isnt intensional. most of the time these people who talk as if nothings wrong but say things in a rude tone or use the wrong words are like this because they wer brought up being around somone that talks and acts the same way. so as they grow up and are around people like this for so long it makes their brain think thats its fine and that its norml to act and talk and react this way. i know a few people who arelike this and its fine to talk to them just make sure you expllain to them that they sound rude with what their saying and ask them to think bout what their saying and understand why your taking it in a rude way.
• Philippines
3 May 11
I think its ok to talk with them as long as they respect me. Its much better to talk with rude people than to be with someone who's rude in his ways, movements. I just listen to them and try to understand them. After all i cannot direct them to change. They have their own thinking.
• Nigeria
3 May 11
Talking to a rude person may just be as irritating as can be. But two wrongs can not make a right they say. so when you encounter a rude person, just be as polite as you can or best, you could just ignore him or her. it sends a message to the said person.
@JoyfulOne (6242)
• United States
3 May 11
Yes, in my lifetime I have met many, many rude people. Both online, and off. I don't know if they're actually born that way, maybe life's circumstance has made them that way. Some rude people are clueless that they are being rude, and they think they're just being honest. Others know they're being rude, and seem to take pleasure in it lol. Some rude people I've met over the years are that way because life has thrown them more than a fair share of hardship along the way, and those I do see them being that way as a way of protecting their hearts. Then once I knew them better, I found that they were just wounded souls inside, and totally wonderful, and their rudeness was just like a protection from further hurt. How to handle them? I think that depends upon whether the rudeness was a personal attack, or merely just rudeness in general. (I DO think there's different 'shades' of rude, if you know what I mean.) A rude troll online, who is just out to flame somebody on purpose and cause problems, is different than a person who is rude, and clueless that they are coming off that way. For the rude trolls, I just ignore them and try not to get sucked into their dramas they seem to enjoy; others, I am still patient and kind in the sincere hope that they will know and appreciate friendliness.