Have you ever felt this way? What is wrong with me?

Hi laydee, I wouldn't say I understand how you feel. I wouldn't have the slightest hint how it feels. I have not been so focused on a relationship, much more that I haven't thought of marriage yet at this age. By the way I am 24 and I have a girlfriend with the same age as me. I told her before that I don't want to get married before I get a stable disposition in life and a stable career. As of the moment I still don't have my own house, my own car, my bank account is not that impressive. And nothing's really that prepared as of the moment, and I'm still working on it. Maybe your boyfriend just have been so much pressured. Well, I do think a lot about marriage if my girlfriend asks me about it. I remember once when we were talking about "US" and she just suddenly mentioned about marriage and having children, and was really taken aback and said, wooow! I ain't ready... We go arguing with each other from there, and we really had such a long argument. And I was fed up, and said if we go on being like that, I'd rather give her the freedom and let her enjoy life without me. As a man, I think a lot of things for preparation. And I am looking at marriage as such a big deal. I mean, I want it the first and last time in my life. And that's the only thing I wished I could do perfectly. I am looking at marriage as my one BEST SHOT in life... But since you already have broken up with your partner. I suggest trying to accept the reality. It's the first thing that should be done, ACCEPTANCE. And yes, it's so hard and it takes a lot of courage to face reality and say yes, it's over. But you have to. Then from there start moving on. I don't know and wouldn't know how long it would take you, but if you could do that, it would be much better... I'd be around here . . . so keep posting... You'd be better soon, but you have to believe you will be. :) God bless you. have a great life! :)

Well there is no use regretting. All we can do is live our lives daily knowing that there are still a lot of days ahead of us. You should learn from your mistakes and hopefully not commit it again. It is difficult to cope with, but you should keep yourself busy. If you are doing this then you are in the right track. Very hard at the start but you will get use to it.

I am very close to the big three-zero age but my mind and heart is not worried about getting married. I may not understand you the way you want me to, laydee. Today, it's very hard for me to see myself getting married. It's every woman's dream and I also wanted to get married someday. But what's stopping me is that I am not financially stable yet. Emotionally, too. Because marriage requires both. I don't want to be in a marriage where in I am dependent to my soon-to-be husband. I also don't want to be in a marriage where in my soon-to-be hubby is dependent to me. I want us to be financially independent with each other because I don't want money to be the reason wherein it would be the cause of our misunderstanding. And when it comes to our emotions, I don't want it also to be the reason where in a time would come that we would blame each other because we rush ourselves to get married. Maybe that's how your partner feels. He's waiting for the right time. If you really love him, you'll be more patient with him and maybe he still has goals in life that he wants to attain. Give him time. Let him breath. Give yourself some time too. Spend quality time with yourself. I know it's hard. Been there done that. Embrace yourself first. Be empowered of the woman you are. Life is beautiful, laydee.

How old are you by the way? if you do not mind me asking...because as far as i have read women nearing 30 ( i guess) are more likely to be worried as to when they will settle down...but am not really sure.. but i guess you wont get yourself anywhere if you get impatient... men are likely to get scared if women will rush marriage in to them...so be patient and it will come.

That's absurd. How old are you? Life should be about having fun. Getting married requires commitment. You should just lay back and have fun.

I live with my boyfriend now for six years and although I was married once before, I guess for me this is the reason why I am not in a rush to be married. I understand your feelings though, as it sounds like you just want to feel the full commitment. I am sorry you and he are under a break right now, do take time to cry, scream and vent. It is understandable especially if you have been with him for a long time. Just allow time to either bring you two back together and or to heal. I wish I could be a bit more supportive, but do know it is quite alright to vent, you must not hold it inside because it will make you very depressed. During the time, do think clearly if you definitely want to be back with him, and if you do, it would be okay to contact him and ask him to sit and talk with you. But do understand that perhaps commitment for him right now meand that the marriage if so may need to wait a bit more. You just don't know really, because the separation actually might have him thinking that he just can't live without you. Good luck and hope all goes well.

Seems typical of women. They often can't deal with being alone. Which was understandable before they were allowed descent jobs. It's like I tell my best friend who is always dating someone. She needs to be okay with being alone so that she isn't just jumping from one guy to the next, but even she admits she can't really do it. I noticed as I've gotten older I miss having someone more often though, I still enjoy the freedom of being single. If you really want spend the rest of your life with that person then enjoy your time together and don't worry about the title. I ended a relationship for almost that exact reason. She became more worried about where the relationship was headed than enjoying it. Honestly ask yourself why you're in the relationship you are in. If the answer is anything other than you really enjoy being with that person that's not the right answer. If you're worried about where the relationship is going, ask yourself where it's going to go after marriage. Do you want to be with that person or do you just not want to be alone? Because if your in a relationship where one of you isn't happy, your going to find that being physically close can still leave you very alone.

Being a woman myself, I know how hurt you must have felt. But the other mylotters are right, you can't push your BF into something if he's not ready..or worse yet, if he does not see himself spending the rest of his life with you. I cannot comment on the whole hormonal thing, cause I haven't felt it. I am 29 and turning 30 this year so if there is such a thing I should like have it already (am sounding like it is some sort of an illness!LOL) Anyways, try not to dwell on it too much. It is alright to vent for a while..rant for a while but after a period of time just learn to let it go. There is more to life than just the two of you together. Honestly, it is not that bad a situation. We all go through heartaches and disappointments. Now that you've split, you can go focus on yourself. Be happy. :-)