One word can affect a person life.

@cora30 (134)
United States
May 25, 2011 5:35pm CST
I just noticed sometimes that when we talked we tend not to think what we are about to say we dont care if your hurting somebody else feelings.But sometimes a strong words needs to be utter in order for a person to be awake and letting him/her realize that he/shes wrong.But then again before we say a word we must first listen to our heart and think.What about you my fellow mylotters,what are you ideas ?feel free to share.i would just love it hearing different ideas coming from you guys.
1 person likes this
14 responses
@tiffnkeat (1676)
• Singapore
25 May 11
Sometimes it is not what we say, but also how we say it. Yes, even if it is a word. Our tone, our body language all plays a part in conveying the message, whether intended or otherwise.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 May 11
This is very true. Sometimes, even if your intentions are good, you can hurt someone by telling them something. I sent a message on Facebook to my friend to explain to her why I couldn't go to her huge birthday party. I really wanted to go, but because of a problem between my mother and her dad (her dad borrowed money from my mother, and in five years did not even attempt to pay her back or even call her to let her know why he couldn't) I couldn't go. I sent her the message because I felt that she would think that I didn't care about her if I didn't go since it was a big deal and I had no other reason not to go. She didn't know about the money. I didn't mention it to her in years because I didn't think it was her responsibility or problem. I finally let her know why I didn't go to see visit her (she lives in another state) in all of those years because I was tired of lying and giving her excuses for why I couldn't come. I felt like I was lying to her and I didn't like lying to her. I sent her the message, but I was brutally honest about her father and the fact that he used to make jokes about my mother being cheap when I was younger (never to her face). My mother lent him the money despite hearing back about that from me because she didn't want his three kids to end up on the street. I thought it was stupid that he would make fun of her for saving her money since she was a single mother. I told her they weren't friends, and he ended up running back to that same woman to borrow money. At the time that I was writing the message, which I didn't plan to write (it just kind of happened), I was only thinking about the way I felt and my honest feelings. I was honest, but I was brutally honest and I didn't think about the way she would take it. Even though she told me that her dad says hurtful things to her at times, in the end he is still her father and I should have kept that in mind. I was so concerned about being understood and honest that I didn't think about how she would take the message. We didn't talk to each other for maybe over 6 months after that (and we've known each other all our lives, literally-I'm 2 years older than her). She also did some stuff before this incident that hurt me and made me feel she was disingenuous because she wasn't as honest with me to let me know how she felt to my face, but posted Facebook statuses and joined groups that were obviously directed to me. I didn't appreciate the fact that she wasn't as honest with me. If she felt I was behaving a certain way, I would have preferred if she just told me this directly, rather than trying to send me subliminal messages. After the incident I didn't contact her again. I figured I got myself into enough trouble trying to be understood so I would just leave well enough alone. She recently came to visit New York though and wanted to see me. I thought it was going to be awkward but it was just like old times. She obviously wanted to put the whole thing behind us because we've been friends forever. I wanted to apologize for the way that I said things, although I would make it clear that what I said I meant because I believe in being honest with people. The only thing is that I think her and her mother both assumed that I sent the message for different reasons than I really sent it for, and they have some things wrong. I don't think it's worse addressing right now though. At some point when it's more comfortable I will tell her. I think that it's very important that you always take into consideration how other people will feel or take something. Even if you mean well, you can really hurt someone. Even if you are talking about a parent that has treated the person you are talking to badly, in the end that other person is still their parent, and they will feel badly about anything negative being said. I should have known this from my own experience with hearing people talk badly about my father, and remembering how badly I felt because of it (even though my father is a drunk and has made some very bad mistakes in his life). I think you can tell anyone anything, it's just how you address them and choose to get the message across. That's what's most important, considering the other person as well.
• United States
26 May 11
Sorry I meant "I don't think it's worth addressing right now though"
@stary1 (6614)
• United States
25 May 11
Words do affect people and I think we should be careful what we say. We also need to consider the personalities with whom we are speaking because some people are more sensitive than others. With some just a hint is enough, yet with others you have to be blunt to get your point across.
• China
26 May 11
Yes, some people always hurt people. They are so selfish that they never care how it hurt when they say it. If I am not extremely ungry by others' unreasonable behaviors, I hardly say a word that will hurt others.
• United States
26 May 11
This is true. There are people out here in this world who don't care for others and their feelings. Sometimes we all need to learn how to hold our tongue. Everyone would like for people to take our feelings into consideration, so why don't we all do it? There once was a girl who killed herself because people made fun of her. I feel like that was unreasonable. You should not put someone down so far, that they cannot pick themselves up. Instead of knocking them down we should spend a few minutes and share some kind words with them!
@polaris77 (2035)
• Bacau, Romania
26 May 11
Yes,it's true that we have to be very careful when we talk to somebody because a word can deeply hurt a person;we have to know something about the personality of those we are talking to,because some people are mentally stronger and don't get offended easily,while others do.It's true that sometimes we have to use strong words,to criticize someone,so there are situations in which we have to assume the risk of hurting other people's feelings,but if we know they are more sensitive we have to do our best to tell them what we want without hurting them,as much as possible.
@kumakuma (84)
• Malaysia
26 May 11
I just want to share my experience. When I was in campus, my friend talk something that I really don't like to hear and because of that, our friendship is not like before the incident. I'm upset with her because she talk to me by using the annoying words. Until now, I still can't believe she said that to me. Now, we're not BFF anymore. Yeah, one words can change the relationship and can hurt others.
@QeeGood (1213)
• Sweden
26 May 11
Words can be destroying and uplifting someone's life. Words have different meanings depending on what experience or association you have to particular words. Then how you speak it out, if you do it with courtesy it can became a positive affect on someone.
@ebuscat (5940)
• Philippines
26 May 11
For me yes we need to be good all the time if you think you are heart of what they said said sorry and admit so be good to others you might know what would be the next in line.
• Philippines
26 May 11
I agree. There are certain words that can trigger emotions from another person. It's like pulling the strings to get that person to keep moving or get on his butt and do something. It's like hearing an ambulance's siren and quickly realizing that there had been an accident, in turn, causes our hearts to beat faster.
• Philippines
26 May 11
I agree. There are certain words that can trigger emotions from another person. It's like pulling the strings to get that person to keep moving or get on his butt and do something. It's like hearing an ambulance's siren and quickly realizing that there had been an accident, in turn, causes our hearts to beat faster.
@kukueye (1760)
• Malaysia
26 May 11
Hurtful words are better not utter if possible. - Let them learn from their own stupidity1 rather listen to hurtful words.
Yes words can hurt or build up a person.Like a children how u encourage children will made him her more confident .How bad your discourage the kid also will cause him to lost confident and may effect the child growth potential. Sometime certain people are bad in listening to advice and such, they just plain stupid1 or naive and such, the only way they learn is to suffer the consequence of their own stupidity1 of making the wrong choise.I got few friends who are just like tat.
• United States
26 May 11
I agree that we can with a simple word affect a person's reaction on what exactly we are trying to convey. I also feel that gestures too have a lot to say on how we convey things also. To me it is important to think a bit while speaking because I can think a bit faster then I express outwardly. So most times I try and slow down a bit on my thoughts so that I can get the message across without tainting it's meaning.
@sender621 (14923)
• United States
25 May 11
it truly does only take one word to affect someomne's life. so much can change with that one little word. it can mean so much and cause so many different things to happen in our lives.
@sanijas83 (270)
• Latvia
25 May 11
Words can encourage and destroy. Words can be weapons. People might express something in anger and then regret it. It would be great if people could always have the right decision whether they have to express some ideas that have suddenly come to their mind or keep them to themselves.