Is It Normal That Parents Nag At Their Kids?

Philippines
May 26, 2011 11:56pm CST
It is quite hard to parent a kid. I never thought how difficult it is to be a parent until my kid came into our family. I was soft spoken althrough my life because when I speak loud especially when I am angry, I tend to cry so hard. And when I am being shouted at, my heart really beats so fast.Well, I belong to a family gentle conversation. To my surprise, I discovered a new me when I became a mother. At first, I really consciously controlled myself from shouting at my seemingly naughty kid. Later, shouting became usual the moment he does something wrong. I could not help but really angrily screamed just to stop him doing the wrong things. Someone said that I should avoid shouting at him or else he will be raised to such environment and soon be kinda loud spoken which may later make his not good personality. I have been asking if nagging at kids, or better yet, shouting at kids is really a normal thing in parenting.
3 people like this
11 responses
@Metatronik (6199)
• Pasay, Philippines
28 May 11
That is not normal, and the person who told you to avoid was really right because in the end your kid will be rebellious which is not questionable at all. Obviously you were challenged for being a mother that your patience was tested. If you are used to it then expect the bad karma that will happen to you. Aside from that expect it that your kid is prone to fighting with people. That is not a good parenting. If you are matured and smart you can do other ways to discipline your kid without nagging and yelling. Don't blame your kids if they are like that you should ask yourself in the first place. Aside from that it was your decision that you want them to exist on this world so as much as possible you should be the one to understand them.
1 person likes this
@watergirl (567)
• Philippines
28 May 11
I remember my mother would always nag me about many things when I was growing up. And always, at the end of her "sermon" she would say "...It's not that I hate you. I love you and I just want to raise you properly..." I never really quite understood her until I had my own kids. Parents just want the best for their kids. It pains me to scold my kids but I know I have to discipline them. I just make sure to listen to myself when I'm talking so I know when to stop.
1 person likes this
• United States
27 May 11
I dont know if shouting at a child is going to his personality bad, but it is going to make your throat hurt. I know because I spend most of my days shouting at my 3 year old and my 7 year old. And you would think that my 7 year old would try to teach his little brother how to be respectful and obedient, but he cant even do that hisself. I say do whatever you have to do to discipline your child. he came from you and if shouting at him stops him from being bad then go for it. I am getting tired of these people who are always talking about kids should be treated with respect and they should be treated like adults. Im tired of people always saying dont spank your child, thats abuse. This is your kid so do what you have to do. Nobody can tell you what to do with your son. No one knows what goes on behind closed doors so they cant tell you not to yell or spank because they dont know what you have to deal with.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
27 May 11
Hi there... My mom usually do that when i was a kid, so its not new to me, shouting is already a gentle way for me! its better to shout rather than hurting them. Its a mother's way of correcting their kids mistakes, its also a way to make them realize that not all things they do are right as always been... its part of kid's life...
1 person likes this
@Jessi_T (379)
• United States
27 May 11
I don't think shouting is normal though I know plenty of parents who insist on shouting. My mother was a shouter for instance. A firm voice works so much better and gets the child's attention faster in my experience. As far as nagging them, again I guess that is just how the individual parent, parents. Do I nag my kids? According to me, no. According to them at times yes. I have been told by one of mine in fact "You nag too much" Not sure where he heard that phrase at but since I didn't agree with it I just overlooked it as something kids say when they want to push buttons a little too much. I'm not saying they're not normal parental behaviors but shouting can scare children and I would be very careful when doing it.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
27 May 11
Nagging is defined as fault-finding, teasing and is persistently annoying. This is very different from a need to raise one's voice to stress a point. Nagging is never advisable and it does only hurt than good. A person inclined to nagging is someone who is insecure and unfortunately finds some sort of power in nagging at someone. Nagging is a big no no, not for kids nor for anyone.
@prinzcy (32322)
• Malaysia
29 May 11
I think it's normal. Parents are still human. There are limits to being patients and sometimes, parents will get frustrated and angry as well. I am not a parent, but I do babysit sometimes, whether my younger siblings or my niece and nephew. It's not I wanted to yell but sometimes my voice just got louder without I even notice.
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
27 May 11
hello kesh, This is true,we will never knew how it is to be a parent unless we become one. I am not used to nagging ans shouting when i am a kid because i know i am a good girl (hehehe) okay sometimes naughty-but that stubborn (just a little bit) When i become a mother myself,my kids are a better kiddos when they're small,they listened to me easily. But now that thy're grown ups...it's not the same. They always made me mad when they don't clean their rooms and all they do is sticking their eyes and fingers to their computers (ugh?!!!) Mess is really an eye sore for me,i can't live with it and it's enough to spoil my day. And my kids are happy to make me angry with their messy rooms Uhmnn..i want to cool down (hehehe) so mylotting gives me more peace have a great weekend ahead
1 person likes this
@manubla (472)
• Philippines
28 May 11
I think so. I'm not yet a parent but that's how family members who are already parents behave. So I think it may be tough to become a parent...tough but rewarding .
@tiina05 (2317)
• Philippines
27 May 11
hello, My mom keep on shouting whenever my brother get really naughty in many things. I also remember that she also do that to us when we are little. I dont know if it has an effect to a child but for me nothing seems happened. Maybe it really depends on the children if they will adopt it or not if they grow up, I can say that as I grow this is not my attitude because I am a talkative person but I dont really like to speak loud.
1 person likes this
@kumakuma (84)
• Malaysia
27 May 11
I think it is normal. My mom always nag to me when I was in high school and as I grow up, my mom slowly not nagging anymore. I think my house are more exciting if my mom keep nagging. I enjoyed listen to my mom nagging.HAHA