Babysitter Blues
By xtedaxcvg
@xtedaxcvg (3189)
Philippines
June 7, 2011 12:00am CST
Here in the Philippines, babysitters are called "yaya" and they are a "stay-in" type of house help.
Just recently my daughter's yaya asked if she could go on a week-long vacation. We said yes and we even approved her request to get her 1 month salary in advance. She said she needs the money so we didn't have second thoughts in giving that to her. Guess what, she never came back! She said her husband didn't allow her to go back because of issues with their children. We're thinking now of how to at least get the money she asked in advanced and we're also having a hard time without a yaya.
I guess this will serve as a lesson to us and to you fellow mylotters - always be prepared and do not give your trust so easily.
How about you guys, have you had similar experiences?
1 person likes this
9 responses
@SIMPLYD (90717)
• Philippines
7 Jun 11
That's the difficult part of having a married yaya. That can always happen specially that it is already the opening of classes. The children have to be attended to.
Be sure to find a "yaya" who is still single and at least has reached high school, and is more or less with some "diskarte" in life. Much more, an honest one.
Good luck in finding a yaya again.
@xtedaxcvg (3189)
• Philippines
7 Jun 11
The sad part is she did this to us twice now. The first time was understandable. But now.. Aaargh! I'm just so mad at her right now that I can't imagine what I would say to her when I see her.
@xtedaxcvg (3189)
• Philippines
7 Jun 11
And what a painful experience this is. I guess you're right. I'll try hard to forget about the money. Thanks!
@SIMPLYD (90717)
• Philippines
7 Jun 11
When you see her, talk it out with her. Be angry if you must. HOwever, do not expect to be repaid anymore, because all along you know that they don't have the capacity. Charge it to experience. 
@samaire (154)
• United States
8 Jun 11
Don't you have parents or your wife's parents can take care of the baby. Or hire someone who still study and put cameras in the house. The girl will need the money and won't go anywhere or hire a daughter of your friends so you will know her and her parents! As for the money go to the police and explain them the situation! They have to help
@xtedaxcvg (3189)
• Philippines
15 Jun 11
My parents have jobs so they can't commit 100 percent. My wife's mother is a widow and she's over 70 years old. We don't know anybody who can babysit for us who is trustworthy.
@rakittera (802)
• Philippines
7 Jun 11
Oh, the yaya stories I could tell! I had just one yaya for my first daughter and she left to get married. We never had any problems with her. But those that followed her were really problematic. 2 of them even stole from us. One stole my daughter's clothes and the other stole cash. I can't believe how they can do that to us even if we treat them well. After the stealing incident, I've made it a point to check their things before they leave for a vacation or if they resign. Sadly, it's hard to trust people nowadays. You can try getting your money back but in my opinion, I don't think she'll give it back to you. So, I suggest you take it as a lesson learned. While it's nice to be trusting, not all people are trustworthy.
@xtedaxcvg (3189)
• Philippines
7 Jun 11
That's what I'm trying to avoid. At least if they would just steal from us, I hate to think what would happen to my daughter if she was left alone with a nasty sitter. Oh the horror, that one actually gave me the shivers.
@dong88 (795)
• China
7 Jun 11
Hello!This experience I have had.The heart of unpredictable.In the chinese proverb,told us to have to guard ageinst others heart,do not have hurt people's idea.So,learn the lesson,I also become more realistic.Want to know,some people just uses people's kindness to deceive.
@xtedaxcvg (3189)
• Philippines
7 Jun 11
Yep, you got that right. We got "used" in this ordeal and we're learning the hard way. I really hope we could find a replacement ASAP.
@kingparker (9673)
• United States
7 Jun 11
The same with the mechanic who came to my house and fix my car. He told me that he could get very cheap price on a sensor that fix the airbag problem, and he told us to give him some money in advance. Guess what, he never came back to fix the car, even though I called his cell many times, seems he doesn't want to pick it up. Don't let me see him again, or I will spread out how bad his service is.
@xtedaxcvg (3189)
• Philippines
15 Jun 11
I feel the same way for that babysitter. But I guess they need the money more than we do. I'm just disappointed because we trusted her and she gave us her word that she will come back. My wife's family even know their family so that's just sad.
@lilbabycatapillar (497)
• United States
7 Jun 11
Hey there, my advice to you is to remain optimistic. Chances are, she really didn't know that she was not able to come back, and maybe she really, truly needs the money. Of course, you need to put your family first. Maybe your best bet is to approach her with understanding.
@xtedaxcvg (3189)
• Philippines
7 Jun 11
Thanks for the advice. I guess you're right. She might need the money more than we do. And I guess I'd do the same thing if I was in her shoes. Thanks again.
@chuyins123 (2112)
• Philippines
7 Jun 11
Hi,
Sorry to hear about that. Well, you could at least ask her in a polite manner to send the money she got from you in advance if she won't be able to come back. Find another one, maybe ask your friends out if they know someone who could be a yaya or maid. It's hard if you're not used to it.
It's a lesson learned the hard way my friend. The next time around you'd be more careful at trusting others.
We use to have a yaya when I was in grade school. But when I was in highschool, we ousted our yayas and maids, LOL. We petitioned to our parents that we will do all the chores, and we want the maids out. we're so evil by then, we did it, because we want our parents to come home early as they can thinking we were just alone at home with out yayas or maids 
we're so evil by then, we did it, because we want our parents to come home early as they can thinking we were just alone at home with out yayas or maids @xtedaxcvg (3189)
• Philippines
7 Jun 11
Yeah, it's a lesson in trusting others alright. And we've learned it the hard way. I'm tempted to demand the money she asked from us instead of asking politely. After all, she doesn't deserve any politeness for what she did to us.
@edsss17 (4394)
• Philippines
7 Jun 11
Hi xtedaxcvg,
That's why my parents didn't get any yayas and maids. There are many unreliable people in this world now..
I guess that's a good decision that my parents made because we grow up that didn't rely to anyone and we become responsible enough for everything! 
@xtedaxcvg (3189)
• Philippines
7 Jun 11
That is my plan when my daughter is at least 7 or 8 years of age. But alas, she's only 1 year and 7 months old so she can't take care of herself while me and my wife are both at work.
@jureathome (5361)
• Philippines
18 Apr 12
This looks like a very old post, but I'd like to share my experience, anyway. I had the same issue just a few months ago. We allowed are yaya to spend new year at their hometown and gave her 1 month advance payment, so she could give it to her parents. But, she never came back and just sent a text message to my mother saying her father won't allow her to come back anymore. After a couple weeks, we found out from my in-laws (they were the ones who got her for us) that she went with a guy and her parents were even upset about the sudden news. She was only 18, and I can't imagine how she met the guy when she barely even go out while she was with us. Well, too bad, I was actually planning to have her continue her studies soon. Anyways, I just wish her well.
