My brother literally RUINED my life!

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I'm going to graduate high school in 12 days, and it's a huge weight off my chest that I've had for 13 years, from kindergarten to my senior year. The reason is, I've always known I was different. I have a high level of self esteem. I know I'm clever, and smart, and I'm loyal to people who are my friends. I'm a fine person to be around, there's nothing wrong with me, just as I am. So why has it been so hard for me to make friends? I spend most of these years with almost no friends. I'm not ugly at all, in fact, I like to think I'm sort of pretty- though I did have a long awkward stage with glasses and braces! I get panic attacks when it comes to approaching people. I overthink it. I don't want anyone to think I'm boring or annoying or awkward. My lack of comfort within myself has made it nearly impossible to make friends. What I realized tonight is that it comes from just one place. Almost constantly, when I was little, my brother, two years older than me, would constantly tease me about everything I did. He belittled me, and made me feel stupid, and made me believe I was always uncool and annoying and stupid. He made me feel like everything I ever did was wrong. So as much as I know I'm this great person, I can't help but blame myself whenever something goes wrong. I feel inferior when it comes to social skills. Maybe as a defense mechanism, I put myself on a pedestal, too- it's just come to a point where I'd feel completely disconnected to everyone around me. I would just be nervous, all the time. In hindsight, I don't think I was as disliked as I felt I was, in school. But I was just so insecure of myself. It wasn't really a problem with me, but how I presented myself. I didn't know how. I got scared all of the time. So I spent 13 very long, very difficult years of being the last picked in gym and not having a partner for projects. It was lonely. It was a dark place that I never want to be in again. I've found myself, and I'm slowly overcoming it, and it's getting better. I have so much to do in this life. But I now know that this suffering came from my own brother, and he has no idea how much he has damaged me. He was young too, at the time, and had no idea how much it was going to affect me. As much as I don't like the idea of putting so much of a blame on one person, it's true, and I know this isn't my fault. But now it's on me to overcome it. If you have any advice for me to become more comfortable with myself, please share!