FIL given 3-6 months to live..
By katsmeow1213
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
United States
September 2, 2011 3:19pm CST
My FIL has been battling many health issues. He is diabetic, and has been for quite some time. He gets wounds and infections in his feet and legs that do not heal well. He's lost many toes due to infections.
Two years ago he began having problems where he was losing blood and it was not regenerating. It took us until a few months ago to figure out what was causing this problem, but we learned it was pre-leukemia. His body stopped making blood and he would need regular transfusions.
We also learned last week that he has something called MDS where his body is immune to certain anti-biotics.
My husband just got off the phone with a doctor from the hospital where my FIL is staying. The pre-leukemia turned into full blown leukemia. There is nothing that can be done about it due to FIL's other health problems. Basically all they can do is make him comfortable and give him blood transfusions more regularly.
My father in law will die within the next 6 months.
This is something that I have been expecting to hear, so I am not surprised or shocked. Mostly I feel bad for my husband because I know this news is hurting him, and I know there is a lot he will have to deal with while preparing and handling his father's affairs and arrangements.
Have you ever heard the news that a relative or friend has only months to live? How did you take the news? Was it expected or surprising?
2 people like this
12 responses
@lilybug (21107)
• United States
3 Sep 11
When my grandpa finally went to the doctor this past winter he found out that his kidney's were functioning at 12% and he refused dialysis, so it was only a matter of a month or so that he was expected to live after that. He was ok with going. He said it was his time. That did not make it any easier on the rest of us though.
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
5 Sep 11
Knowing that it's going to happen doesn't seem to be making it any easier. FIL got out of the hospital yesterday. We stopped over earlier today to check on him and drop off some food, and hubby walked in to see him collapsed over a chair, apparently he had fallen there and couldn't get up, and he'd been in that position for about an hour. Thankfully we'd stopped by when we did, we planned on going later and FIL would have been collapsed there all day with no way of getting any help. So, FIL is back in the hospital now, but the events of the day have taken their toll on my husband and his nerves are shot right now.
@jillhill (37353)
• United States
5 Sep 11
When we found out that my mother had cancer....and it had spread too far. They told us she had six months to live....she was my best friend. I remember my sister called me at work.....and I went to the break room and cried. When I got home I was so angry about it I even broke dishes.....which is just not me. A friend sent me flowers and the guy that delivered them had just lost his wife....when he saw me he took me into his arms and hugged me and let me cry. I wasn't expecting the news at all...we thought something else was wrong.
@danishcanadian (28954)
• Canada
2 Sep 11
This is super sad. I've never actually received this kind of news, but I have suspected that relatives would die in a certain amount of time, and I have usually been right. It's never a surprise when they do, but it still hurts.
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
4 Sep 11
He's not extremely upset by it.. and he feels bad that he's not as upset as he thinks he should be. I think it's more or less expected and to a point where it's okay, you know. My FIL is 76 and has not been healthy for a very long time. He has been suffering and has not had a good quality of life for the past few years. There is very little sense in prolonging the inevitable. I think my husband knows it's his father's time to go. Mostly we're concerned with how to handle the aftermath.. arrangements and settling his possessions, etc.
@3SnuggleBunnies (16374)
• United States
26 Sep 11
I've never heard the news that someone had months to live exactly. With my Mother, they basically said if she could not get off the vent she would not make it. So that was a Wed and by Sat her body was shutting down. Though the Dr did try to be optimisit and say that we could have a breathing tube inserted into her neck but she'd have to be sedated and go to a specialty nursing home if she could live on minimal life support. She was not happy at the nursing home and her body shut down anyway within days. Though the Dr had said she would have at most IF she got out of the hospital a few months if that and a year would of been pushing it.
@frankiecesca (2489)
•
13 Sep 11
I am so sorry to hear the news - I know what you mean that it hasn't as such, come as a shock but, it is still never easy and I hope that the husband will be able to appreciate the time he has left with him. My thoughts are with you x
@maximax8 (31042)
• United Kingdom
3 Sep 11
I am very sorry to hear that your father-in-law is expected to die within the next months. It is terrible when health complaints can't be cured and the only thing is give pain relief. I feel very sorry for your husband in particular.
I was very good friends with the mom of one of my friends. It was so shocking to find out she had cancer and was in hospital dying. I sent her a letter which had been very difficult to write. Good luck to your family.
@bunnybon7 (50970)
• Holiday, Florida
2 Sep 11
so sorry. im hoping my kids wont have to deal with this soon. they told me that with my hubby 3 mths before he went and i had such denial. i really thought my prayers and Jesus would bring a miracle. im afraid i didnt face it to well. i will pray your hubby can handle it well and not greive to long.
@wilsongoddard (7291)
• United States
3 Sep 11
I've heard that sort of news before. However, the doctors really don't know how long a person will live. Some people far exceed the expectations; others go far more quickly than expected.
@pbbbsra (1214)
• Philippines
3 Sep 11
When we learned about my grand mom's cancer, it was too late to save her because she kept it as a secret. Learning that a loved one is about to die is not easy to take. We fighter for her until the last second of her breath. It was very painful and I know that it will be painful for your husband too. This is the time he needs you the most. I bet he will have to go through the moaning process in a hard way, stay beside him and always hold his hand. I still pray your father in law will have a longer life... prayers work, and my payers will be with your family too.
