To Dance? To Study? or to save relationship?
@nizxahrebaula (3)
Philippines
September 17, 2011 7:15am CST
Hi guys! Im nizxah, i just needed you advice to solve my problem.
Im a college student and i am a member of our schools dance crew. I am now in the second semester, i got a high grades in my previews term, and now our dance crew are going to compete with the inter-school competition here in our country. And it will going to be held next week. My problem is my boyfriend try's to stop me from joining the dance competition, but i don't want to, because dancing is my passion and i really wanted to compete and to represent my school and above all so that my parent will going to be proud of me.
I really love my boyfriend, but i don't know why he keeps stopping me from dancing. We haven't talk yet about a week, and my mind keeps telling me that maybe the reason behind is he just wanted me to focus on my study's, or maybe he might just get paranoid and thinks that i am cheating him. GOD! what should i do? Keep on pursuing my passion? Or stop pursuing it just to save our relationship?
2 people like this
12 responses
@tessa9 (1085)
• Philippines
17 Sep 11
Well I think your boyfriend should understand that dancing is what you love to do. Make him feel like you are not neglecting your studies for dance and not neglecting your relationship for dance. Do you want to be a dancer when you graduate? I had a friend who was two years ahead of me and the last time I saw him he said he regret not focusing on his studies and other stuff in school. He focused so much on his theater work in school that he feels like he missed out on other things.
@nizxahrebaula (3)
• Philippines
17 Sep 11
I really love dancing and i just wanted to enhance my skills and i also wanted to be a role model for my fellow students that i can balance my studies and of course dancing, i wanted to be an inspiration for them.
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
18 Sep 11
No dear!! Don't ever sacrifice a dream for a man, ever.
You can like talk less to your male friends, if you go out all weekends with your girls you can narrow down to 2 or 1, you could modify your clothes like if he is complaning about short skirts...
But don't ever STOP DOING anything because of a relationship, not only with guys but for the guys too, I mean for our partners. If they love us they support what WE LOVE, don't stop dancing, you'll regret and will be disappointed with your self.
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
18 Sep 11
You need to get it out of your chest, I don't think you could compete with him at the back of your mind being angry for doing so. You need to talk to him now and ask him why. If his reasons are valid, then that's the time you could decide if he's just being petty.
You should not stop your dreams, you should not need to decide. He should be someone who's going to support your endeavors and such.
You take care.
Have a great MyLot experience ahead!
@yskaps (233)
• India
18 Sep 11
hey...don break up with ur guy... he told so only because he loves you like you loves him... I'm sure if u both guys are true lovers and u can surely make ur guy realize about ur interest and convince him for ur dance.. I hope u can participate in dance with his consent... hope for the best.. and try for it... [:-)]
@shuuen (39)
• Japan
18 Sep 11
If your boyfriend loves you then he will respect you for whatever you want to do with your life. You are not owned by anybody, and no one can stop you in your pursuits. If dancing is what you want to do, then do it! If your boyfriend persists and threatens to leave you, then you do not deserve a man who will only hinder you in reaching for your dreams.
@someone27 (31)
• Philippines
18 Sep 11
You can do all of these at the same time if you just have time management. Me too had the same problem when I was in college but right now I have a good job, living with my passion and still with my boyfriend. Your boyfriend had the right to demand some of your time and you should not just focus on your passion...:D
@shadow41 (2351)
• Philippines
17 Sep 11
I know you love your boyfriend but go on and dance. It's your passion and I think your boyfriend is just acting childish. I think he's just jealous and afraid that you might get involved with another guy. You both should have a sincere dialogue about this topic. Explain to him that dancing is really your passion and that you wanted to make your parents proud. Tell him you really love him and assure him you won't do anything stupid like cheat around.
He may realize then that joining the dance competition will really make you happy and will allow you to participate. If not then he's really a stubborn and selfish guy. I'm sorry for that. But he's really acting childish. :)
shadow41
@sinawaliboy (271)
• Philippines
17 Sep 11
Well extra curricular activities should not hinder you in your studies. It's going to be physically, emotionally, and mentally taxing but you have to do it since that is your responsibility. A partner in life on the other hand must be very supportive of your endeavors. I really don't understand why he is stopping you, I suppose he has a good reason but then again, it's a passion and you cannot let that stop you from pursuing it.
@thatgirl13 (7294)
• South Korea
17 Sep 11
I know how you feel about dancing coz I have a lot of passion for dancing too and it just makes me happy while I am dancing. But the thing here is, why is your boyfriend opposing you so much? I don't get it! I think you should just talkk to him about why he is doing so. And to be honest, if he loves you a lot, he should be happy with what makes you happy. And here, dancing does that to you isn't it? So I think the best thing would be to ask him why he doesn't like you dancing.
@nezavisima (7408)
• Bulgaria
17 Sep 11
I do not know what to say.
I think keep dancing to learn.
If a man loves you and keep you gonna run to appear on the race and will not stop doing their favorite things.
so my advice is to break with this guy and when you meet her true love will see that it will not stop doing what you dream about.
nice day!
@love2click (366)
• Philippines
17 Sep 11
I think your boyfriend felt jealous on what you are doing or to the group you belong. Tell him that he should understand whatever you do if he truly loves you.
In my opinion, continue pursuing your dream. Don't let anyone disturb you for achieving it. Show to your boy and your family that you can excel to your study while doing your passion which is dancing. Believe me girl, if you get successful with the competition I'm sure your boyfriend will run to you to congratulate you. And if you failed, i know he will also comfort you despite of your arguments.
Go girl!
Good luck to the upcoming competition!!!
@sideword (40)
•
17 Sep 11
Don't let anyone be a hindrance to your success. To represent your school and compete is an opportunity, don't let it slip away. You have a talent in dancing so you should use and develop it, especially that it can make your parents proud of you, and also you will also be proud of yourself. Every achievement you will receive will help you to be a better and successful person. I know you're prioritizing your studies but having extra activities such as dancing will also improve yourself. That is your passion so go for it. For your boyfriend, if he really loves you, he should understand you and instead support you and be proud. If he will be the hindrance to your success, then he is not worthy to be your boyfriend. So go and compete, good luck, hopefully you win. Break a leg! Take care!
