Do you think parents treat their children at same level?

@sblossom (2168)
October 31, 2011 9:14pm CST
This year I have spent longer with my parents. it was happy time, but sometimes i didn't feel happy. I feel my parents care my sister more than me. That made me very sad. Some people say parents treat their children equally. But from my experience and other people experiences I don't think so. What do you think it? Thanks.
1 person likes this
9 responses
@megamatt (14292)
• United States
2 Nov 11
I think most parents worth their weight do. However, I do think that there are many times where there are going to be a lot of favorites a lot of the time. Even if it is unintentional, that is just the way it is. I am glad that I am an only child, because I never really want to know whether or not I might have been the less favorite. You just never know. You really just never know a lot of the time, it is frustrating but rather true. I think that a lot of the times it is accidental. I think that is only human as well, unfortunately in many ways. People cannot avoid making comparisons a lot of the times. The same thing is with rather true with parents and children. We like to think that this is not the case. However people might have to face that realization. Parents won't admit it and really, unless you want to scar a child for life, no one would admit that. but it is true.
1 person likes this
@sblossom (2168)
15 Nov 11
You are lucky to be a only child in your family. Sometims I think why I don't live in a child family. If I have children in my life I would like to have only one. Then I can focus all my love and time on him/her. Anyway I would not complain anymore. I'm a lucky person too. My parents love me and they spend a lot of time and money on me. The achivement I have got is all contributed by them. Now I feel very shamed to start the topic. I shouldn't doubt about their love.
@Dassodils (2010)
• India
1 Nov 11
Hello friend...I think it will be your imagination...You have that doubt in your mind...So you always watching them and feel so...All parents are equal in the matter of their children..They will not see separately...Your sister will be younger than you...So they will show more attention to her...Because a small child don't know any thing..We have to take care of them...That's why your parents cares your sister more than you... All the best....
@sblossom (2168)
14 Nov 11
Thank you very much for your reply. You can say it's my imagination. I agree I do pay a lot of attention to watching them and to comparing the love they gave me and my old sister. It's part of my problems. I live abroad many years and have not many friends around me. I think I feel lonely and lack love in my life. It maybe the reason I request the love from my parents.
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
1 Nov 11
I thought of the same too when it comes to my mom and how she cared for my younger brother. But i feel that she all loved us the sae. Though she gives more time to the little brother. I read somewherd though that parents love us equally but they tend to give more tie and attention to the one who needs them more. But Thu doesn't mean they loved the other kids less.
@sblossom (2168)
14 Nov 11
Finally I read a reply from a friend who has a similar feeling with me. I agree with you. My parents love me too. But I still think my parents treat me differently with my old sister. My sister has some difficulty in her life. It made my parents pay more attention on her. I understand that. Sometimes they are busy and they forget what I need. Maybe it made me jealous and upset.
@indahfth (11161)
• Indonesia
1 Nov 11
Parents, must have loved all his children. Nothing distinguished. Even if there are differences, not because it is not love, or be picky. Every child needs different attention. Usually because of age, have special needs, need more guidance, and many other factors.
@sblossom (2168)
11 Nov 11
Thanks for your brief explaination. It really answered my question. I agree my sister and I have different needs, but my sister got more than she deserved. She should be more independent. But now my parents still do a lot of things for her like she was a child. It made me angry. My parents are getting older. They need more care, but my sister does think it even.
@hvedra (1619)
1 Nov 11
Sometimes parents do treat their children differently but equally but in some households there is definitely favourtism or other unequal treatments which can cause a lot of heartache. Sometimes it is a subtle difference but I've seen and experienced treatments that were very different between siblings. There are some obvious cases where a girl and boy are treated differently because a parent or parents wanted one and not the other. In other cases it seems to be on a whim that one kid is favoured and another is not.
@sblossom (2168)
14 Nov 11
All the reply from above said that parents treat their children equally. Your answer is different from those. I have seen and agree with what you said. In some country parents treat girls and boys in very big difference. From my personal experience it's not like that. My parents just have me and my old sister. My feeling is that they treat my sister better than me. One of the reasons is I left them and live abroad.
@ardoy0731 (7308)
• Philippines
1 Nov 11
Yeah that usually happen but sometimes we're just assuming it.Misinterpretation maybe but what is sure is they equally love us all.
@sblossom (2168)
15 Nov 11
Yes. It happened a lot in real life. Along with the age I have seen many in my life. However I know my situation is different from that. I know my parents love both me and my sister. They work very hard to give us the best they can. I feel ashamed now to compare the love from them. Recently I have experienced many difficult things in my life. I think it affected my judgement and my attitudes towards to them.
• Khaimah, United Arab Emirates
1 Nov 11
I believe that every parents care and love their children in especially way. But, we, Children we expect a something from our parents. We try evaluate that they have different care for every siblings. In that way our parents hard to meet our expectations.
@sblossom (2168)
11 Nov 11
In some point it's true. It's a difficult situation for parents who have more than one child. I know it, but I don't think it's same as I think about my parents. My parents love me. I agree it. Now I just feel uncomfortable with the way they treat me and my old sister. I have spent many years outside home. I think I should get more attention when I'm home, but the fact is totally different.
• India
1 Nov 11
What made you think so my friend?Is your sister elder or younger than you?If she younger than you obviously you can notice this.As parents Think that as you are elder than her you can understand well then your sister.Try to be happy with them my friend don't try to compare parent's love.
@sblossom (2168)
9 Nov 11
Thanks for your reply. I can't agree more with you. I know I should not compare the love of my parents. However I feel unhappy for what I have experienced when I'm at my parents home. The main reason I think is my personal decision for my life. I told them I want to live in the UK for all my life. Then I can feel they don't like the idea. They think I'm not good daughter and they now more depend on my old sister.
@anhhai123 (161)
• Vietnam
1 Nov 11
How can you copare love of parent for children? How do you know your parents treat you sister better you? I know my parent love me more than anyone and also love my younger sister too. I can not compare it. In some cases, they give my sister more than me. But I don't think it is unfair for me.
@sblossom (2168)
2 Nov 11
I don't know how to answer your questions. I like your last sentence. You said your parents gave more care to your sister, but you don't think it is unfair for you. I hope I can think like that too. However I can't at the moment. I have hurted my leg at the almost same time when my sister did. When my father knew it. He asked my mother about my sister's leg, but didn't ask any word about me. Many other things like that. Then I felt unfair to me.