Boyfriend tells you he'll commit suicide if you break up, is he bluffing?

Australia
November 6, 2011 12:39am CST
What would you do f you wanna move on but scared to leave because he told you this and you will feel guilty if it does happen. Is it your fault? can you live thinking somehow you were responsible?
3 people like this
11 responses
@bodhi_91 (193)
• India
6 Nov 11
Only thing I can say is that previously I had dumped to girls coz the relation did not work out. Both of them told me the same thing and both of them were totally bluffing. And you got no option than to leave if things dont work out. Your partner should understand this.
1 person likes this
@ivyoon (673)
• United States
6 Nov 11
I agree with bodhi_91. If someone threatens to do themselves harm it is most likely just that... a threat. If they do follow through in any way it shows a serious mental health issue which should be addressed by a professional. Emotions run high in any relationship, but if a person has serious emotional problems it would be noticeable from the beginning of the relationship. If these problems were not apparent until a break-up is imminent, chances are good that the person is "bluffing" in order to gain sympathy and prevent the negative effects of a break-up.
• United States
7 Nov 11
I would assume he was telling the truth and I would leave while staying . I mean I would physically stay but my heart would go. He would only have the shell and soon he will fall out of love with me. And then I would go.
@jbrooks0127 (2326)
• United States
11 Nov 11
There is no question that losing someone you love hurts and hurts a lot. I have lost two wives so know very well what that is like. But you must understand one thing. You are not ever responsible for someone else not being able to handle loss. If he has told you this to try to hold on to you even though he knows you no longer care for him as you should it means only one thing. He either is a very unstable person or he is controlling. Trust me you DO NOT want a controlling person in your life. He would make your life hell because every time you try to go against him in any way he will pull this. If he is unstable you are equally in a bad place. It is not up to you to do what you know is wrong simply because he can not handle it. Please understand that no matter what he does you are not responsible for it. You are only responsible for you and you must take care of yourself and bring only responsible people into your life. If you do not you will be oh so sorry. If you allow him to keep you using this threat you have taught him a valuable lesson. He will use this and other means to continue to hold on to you and you will never ever be happy with him. Be as kind as I am sure you are but you must say NO!
• Philippines
7 Nov 11
Most of the time bluffing, otherwise he has some psychiatric disorder or a very huge personal problem other than just breaking up.
@barehugs (8984)
• Canada
6 Nov 11
This boyfriend is telling you more than he realizes! Primarily he is telling you that violence is justified, and if he can justify it against himself, he can (and will) justify violence against you. For your own sake get away, and stay away, from this man. He is a real and present danger to you and to your friends and family.
@Dassodils (2013)
• India
6 Nov 11
In my view....Most of the boys are acting as a lover for time pass...They will say such things to trap girls..My friend had such experience..They were just friends.. He said his love to her...But she refused it because of some religion problems...But he said the same like your boyfriend...She told me about that...And she agreed this to him...Means accepted his love..After some days,He was achieving some thing from her...I told her to avoid him...But she believed him..And had sympathy on him... At last,She realized..And tried to avoid...But He was not ready for that...And on that time,Her family knew this...Her brother made a talk with him..He knew the seriousness of the problem...and that ended there...The boys will say these type of things for their achievements...We have to realize them..... I think he will be fraud...Leave him as soon as possible.. :-)
@kharlav (1671)
• Philippines
6 Nov 11
i believe that he s just trying to control you. if he truly loves you then he will give you the fredom to choose and nit control you. bluffing is just a form of manipulation. get out while you still can
@ferbjohn69 (1128)
• Philippines
6 Nov 11
You shouldn't be afraid to break up with him.You aren't his slave whom he can keep with him because he want's to. I think he is just bluffing to frighten you so you won't think to break up with him.He is not in love with you because he takes your freedom Don't be afraid to do it.:)
@iuliuxd (4453)
• Romania
6 Nov 11
Sometimes they are bluffing sometimes they don`t but most of the time you are not guilty for what they are doing.There are exceptions though like if you messed with his mind for a long time or he has a mental disease but i don`t know if that`s the case
@saphrina (31732)
• South Africa
6 Nov 11
Such an old line. If someone want to kill themself over that, let them go right ahead. People should learn that whether its a bluff or not, everyone makes their own decisions. And no, it might sound harsh, but life is reality, not a game.
@enelym001 (8325)
• Philippines
6 Nov 11
Most of the time they were just bluffing, although some really do it... My boyfriend once told me about it when I was trying to break up with him. What I told him was that he was showing me how weak he was and that's what I don't like with him. So he promised not to say these words again. That is how I see them if they say such things, they are so weak to accept failure. A friend of mine has a boyfriend that threatens to kill himself if she broke up with him and even saying there is a knife and he will slash himself. So she went there and all he did was crap crying and begging. In the end she still broke up with him and so far he's still alive until now.