Dealing with others.

Hi Pose: I agree with you. We lost so many precious time thinking about, what people has done to us, what are their mistakes and why they are responsible of our sadness. We can not change the others but we have the power on our own lives. Generally, the answer for our problems is inside us, not in the others. Instead of waiting that the world change, we can do the things by our own, change our attitude, took an important choice, but complaining about what the others do/don't do for us is not an option. ALVARO

Changes should comes us. We cannot deal with other people unless we deal with ourselves, fix ourselves. Once we know our capacities, one thing for sure we can other people. It is just matter self-management or self-examination. I know how hard it is but it is for own good, so do it.

Sometimes it's just easier to walk away, or turn the other cheek. Sometimes we see too much of ourselves in others which can also cause conflict. For example take two people who are equally stubborn, and it automatically causes friction. Sometimes it is hard trying to talk to someone who doesn't see resason or is plain obstinate or is aggressive. Having assertiveness skills can work wonders, but being assertive is not easy, some have the knack and it's a gift. Walking away may seem like you are letting the other person win, but it can save heated confrontations, raised blood pressure and aggressive acts which can get out of control. Being able to read the other person is good too, knowing what kind of person they are and how they behave in certain situations. Again a talent to have but not always easy in the heat of the moment.

The world would be a much better place if everyone lived this way and acted calmly towards each other. I try to remember to act calm with my children when they are acting up but believe me it can be really hard at times. Even though I talk calmly to them and tell them to talk calm or lower their voices, it doesn't always work. The times that it does though is wonderful and rewarding.

hello pose. Sometimes it is hard to stay composed when you are dealing with a person who is so hard to deal with. In every action, there is a reaction. You have a point. We must have control over our personal emotions.

Your subject is: dealing with others! Dealing with others also means: other people who have problems and turn to you for help. Or two other people/families fighting and dragging you in. This happens way more often as the problems we might have with our kids (raising them and letting them free to start a life of their own) or problems we have with our partner/own family. I seldom find or see in others what I find or see in myself as well. If so I would have been a great abuser, hustler and scammer and rich by now. I don't feel the need to work with those kind of people or speak to them and let them go on with their bad behaviour. BTW i don't have any problems with my kids or partner or neighbours or friends, there is nothing to deal with if it comes to them. We all understand and respect eachother and the only thing we have in common is that we are way to friendly, attentive, helpful.

Very true. We should never condemn others or look at others with contempt. We all normally mind our own business but how do we deal with people who go out of their way to be rude or hurt us [in the guise of being unaware and with no real intention[according to them]?

Its true that everything we do in a calm and controlled way will result in a better outcome or understanding between parties. Dealing the problem with other people or family member in a good and peaceful way make the problem resolved and a better relationship with that person after the trouble has been talked about. And most importantly having a time within ourself to realize what are our wrongs about the trouble/problem and this will result in realizing that we will solve the problem in a calm way. =)