I wonder if "I" ever gets lonely?
By jillhill
@jillhill (37354)
United States
December 12, 2011 3:38pm CST
We had our big family Christmas with my brother and sisters and nephews and nieces this weekend. It's hard sometimes to believe that we all ( my brother and sisters) came from the same parents. My brother is so full of himself I left yesterday wondering if he is so self involved does it ever get lonely being the center of his own life? He is never happy for anyone else in our family. If someone does something great he in turns brags about himself. My sisters and I all do things for others like our parents did. I never hear about him doing one thing to help others. LIke I give to Toys for Tots....my sisters also do things like this. We also do random acts of kindness.....he however thinks thats weird. I actually feel sorry for him.....when his daughter and SIL and two little grandsons left the celebration, he didn't even get off his chair to hug her or his grandsons. I never leave my family without a hug and an I love you. Do you know someone like this? Do you think they ever get lonely?
3 people like this
11 responses
@sarahruthbeth22 (43143)
• United States
13 Dec 11
No I don't have anyone This selfish. The closest is me I'm afraid. But I did , when I had the money, gave to Toys For Tots and I do random Acts of kindness but I will protect my privacy and my comfort zone. Do I think your brother gets lonely? No. To be lonely you Must Need people. For some reasin he doesn't Need anyone save himself. Was he the Baby of the family? Or just the Only Boy? I'm prying.
@sarahruthbeth22 (43143)
• United States
14 Dec 11
Oh well. He has to figure out he is missing out . Sadly he may not!
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
16 Dec 11
Heck, I don't even leave from visiting my closest friends without a hug from them. With that said, we do have someone in our family that is like your brother, and that is my sister-in-law, I swear, despite the fact that she has three daughters of her own, her world has to revolve around her. She thinks of herself first and then the girls later. She has also never taken the time to get to know anyone in our more extended family. Needless to say, it doesn't seem like she really has many friends.
@Grandmaof2 (7579)
• Canada
13 Dec 11
Looks like I am the first to comment positively. I have only ever had one daughter and she and hubby have given me two wonderful grandchildren. This weekend was our Christmas day as well because my daughter goes to hubby's folks place and although I have always had an open invitation I am just not healthy enough to make the trip so we have our outing ahead of time. My little family give me unconditioned love. They are literally the reason I breath. Thank You for the post!!!
@ellie333 (21016)
•
13 Dec 11
Hi Jill, Know a few people like this, only one thankfully is a family member and they will die a sad lonely old man if they carry on that way, my family member talking here not yours. He sounds insecure and afraid of showing emotion, strange as you all grew up in the same family. There is an aquaintance I know and no matter what the situations always turns the conversation back to them whatever the subject. I am not a psychologist so cannot comment other than that. There is no way I could ever leave my children without giving them a big hug and telling them I love you before I or they go. Hope you had a good weekend though. Huggles. Ellie :D
@cynthiann (18602)
• Jamaica
13 Dec 11
There is nothing that you can do about this regretfully. In many families thee is one who marches to the tune of a different drummer. Same mother and father, same home and environment but they are wired differently. I have seen this in many families and it issad that one in the nest does not possess the same positive qualities. Blessings
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
13 Dec 11
Well, as far as i can discern, your brother is actually a lonely man. He camouflages it by bragging , because he likes no one to do greater than him.
Whenever he hears a nice accomplishment of others, he would readily brag about his also. That's because he is lonely, and he just doesn't want anybody to notice it.
He doesn't like that you are generous. He gets ashamed of himself when you do that.
Sad but it is the truth. 
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
12 Dec 11
My FIL is a lot like this. He is always wanting to brag on himself, and never listen to anything going on Good in my or my husbands life. He is always picking on my husband or I and always finding fault to where I have had to about tell him off. I have had to tell my husband many times NO when he wants to go see his Dad because of the mileage and knowing he will usually come home upset as well. It is a SAD situation and I often wonder for sure if he ever gets lonely for sure.
@carolbee (16230)
• United States
5 Feb 12
It's pretty sad when someone doesn't understand there is a huge world around them with others living in it. I do think someone of this nature gets lonely. My personal choice is to avoid people who are terribly self absorbed because they are boring. Several years ago I was reunited with an old grade school friend. As an adult, she was all about herself and how she had such a sad, pitiful life. I wondered why I was her only friend. Wasn't long before I figured it all out and couldn't wait to slowly vanish from her life. It wasn't easy and I didn't want to hurt her feelings but her life wasn't on the same path as mine. To this day, she is still lonely and has no friends. I do feel sorry for her but I had to remove myself from her pitiful life which, by the way, she wasn't willing to work on things and make it any better. Saving my sanity was more important...lol
@katsmeow1213 (28717)
• United States
19 Dec 11
Sounds to me like he has very low self esteem for whatever reason, so tries to make himself more important to get the attention and affirmation he desires. My sister in law is the same way. She doesn't understand or respect other people's decisions if they conflict with her own beliefs. She'll do anything and everything to make herself appear more important. She owns horses, and when I was pregnant with the twins she bought a new horse which happened to be a decendent of the famous race horse "Secretariat". So when she came to my baby shower she brought the papers as proof that her horse had famous blood, and showed it off to anyone who'd listen. A few of my guests were annoyed, as was I. It was supposed to be my special day, and I think giving birth to twins is far more special than buying a stupid horse.. no matter who its great great grandfather was!
@davaome (1826)
• Philippines
12 Dec 11
He seemed very self-satisfying, not that i think he is selfish (maybe just a little bit), but he seemed not contented of his life, and I think that is the reasons why he brags, to cover up what he lacks.
and it's some how sad that he doesn't even show love to his grandsons. I thought every grandparent loved their grandsons, but he is different. My only guess is that something happened in his life to make him this way.
With that kind of attitude, I'm sure he feels lonely when he can't brag to someone.
