how to move on?

Philippines
December 30, 2011 3:06pm CST
It's so difficult and I even don't want to do that in the first place. Christmas day, we fought because he was angry at me for silly pictures that I uploaded. Then, we didn't talk for about one week coz I was also angry at him. When my anger subsided, I texted him and he did reply but then I feel just so tired. It's like I keep trying to stay when everything has changed. It's just that when I feel that he doesn't care anymore, I tend to remember the times when he did care and we had 3 months of caring for each other and only that one day that we fought. It was also his last day before he goes to have another life. I didn't know why but he was extra demanding that day and I was elusive or avoiding him because I don't want to feel the pain of him leaving. But, I still do feel the pain and I miss him every time I go to our usual place. How can I know if he cares what's happening to us? We are slowly falling apart.
6 responses
@keihimekawa (2010)
• Philippines
4 Jan 12
When you said that "We are slowly falling apart." it means you guys are still together right? Let me just share a small story... I suggest that since he still has that "demanding" side there, I suggest you two talk about it. My ex-BF and I lasted 4 years before we broke up. Up until now I am still unaware of the main cause (but I have a feeling it's 3rd party) and there's no closure between us. I tried asking him to meet me up so we can talk for closure (not patch/fix things up) but he stood me up and never arrived. On the other hand, 2 of my close friends got into a huge dilemma when they guy admitted that he's 2-timing her. The guy eventually broke up with her but they were able to talk. After a few weeks, the guy called her up and suggested that they talk again (which they did). That talk fixed everything up and they're back in each other's arms again. It may sound cliche but communication is key. Try pursuing him to talk to you and if he refuse, ask him "what will happen now?" and decide from there. I don't know about how other myLotters feels but personally, when my ex-BF broke up with me, my ego and self-confidence were shattered and it took me some time to recover. Just ask him to talk with you to clear things out then decide from there.
@soulist (2985)
• United States
4 Jan 12
Sometimes guys need to know how we are feeling. let him know you are sorry for the fight and avoiding him that day but you were worried about the pain of losing him when he moves on to the new part of his life. Tell him you care about him. Why do you feel everything has changed? figure that out first then try to work things out with him.
@kingparker (9685)
• United States
31 Dec 11
It must be hard to have a fight with your dear boyfriend then. No one wants such thing to happen, I hope that your boyfriend will make it up for you soon. Or why not talk it out with your boyfriend as you make the first initiative? I hope everything will straight out soon!
@kaeirole (669)
• Philippines
31 Dec 11
it's ok to feel the time..everything will be healed on the right time..but just don't make yourself miserable because you're hurt..even if you're in pain, you still have to choose if you want a miserable life feeling the pain or you want a better one and just move on..if you have chose which one you want, then everything will follow..and eventually, pain will subside in no time..
@yahnee (1247)
• Philippines
30 Dec 11
I know it hurts but give your mind some rest. If you are really meant for each other, then everything will turn out right. If not, then some other love will find your way, who might be your real destiny. Men just don't talk like we do. They keep their emotions close to their hearts that even if they are in pain, they would keep quiet. Just give him a little more time. He might be thinking of something else at this time about some more important issues than relationships.
@Bellapop (1281)
30 Dec 11
Try to understand why he is being this way, why he is being unhappy, men - when unhappy, they say that only three things will trouble them - money, career or women. Perhaps he is just stressed from work so he is more agitated than usual. It does not help if you retaliate the same mood and anger back at him, just give him some space and be there for him, maybe that is all he needs. And then there's you, of course, you will need someone to help you. Try to take your mind of this trouble, maybe phone a friend, go shopping for bargains, go to the cinema - make yourself feel good and hopefully you will see things differently and things will resolve by themselves, I hope this helps....