Is she a danger to my family?
By Polang
@tkonlinevn (6447)
Vietnam
February 5, 2012 10:22pm CST
Days ago, my husband is a neighborhood with her family. She's smaller than my husband. She and both her parents are very interested in my husband. I think maybe her parents had intended for her husband he if he is not married!
After we were married, they remained close relationship as brothers (as I know). She is very delicate. She often texting, calling me and to eat with us.
She and her husband talk to each other as family. There are funny stories or sad that her family was unhappy, she will call my husband. She also often ask my husband to help transport traveling.
Recently, she even sent her a gift to my husband. She called me to report it. I thought, maybe she felt afraid.
I do not want to doubt my husband. But if she were a danger to my family?
1 person likes this
10 responses
@Shellyann36 (11385)
• United States
7 Feb 12
I think that she is taking extra precautions to assure that you know what is going on when it is going on. This sounds to be out of respect. In order to clarify I would discuss the matter with your husband. If he does not answer your questions satisfactorily perhaps you should address the issue with her. Good luck.
@Shellyann36 (11385)
• United States
8 Feb 12
deedee the keeping your enemies closer is very possible, I think the only way to work it out is to talk to the hubby... If that does not work she needs to confront the woman.
@deedee328 (1122)
• United States
8 Feb 12
Shellyann you could be right or this other woman could be just trying to hide what is going on. Kind of like "keeping your enemies closer". If she befriends the wife, then the wife may be less suspicious of the neighbor.
I think that if the husband is trustworthy, then there is nothing to worry about. It will not matter what the neighbor woman is up to.
I also think that by feeling the need to discuss it and ask for opinions, the wife has some doubts about the neighbor's motives and she (the wife) should sit down and discuss the matter with the husband.
@tkonlinevn (6447)
• Vietnam
9 Feb 12
Thank you All.
I think I'll choose the way 'talk to my husband'. I believe that my husband is the best important in this situation. I can't do anything if my husband don't agree with me. right?
@deedee328 (1122)
• United States
8 Feb 12
This neighbor, or whatever she may think she is, can only be a danger to your marriage and family if your husband chooses to allow her to be. Chances are good that if you are asking the question here on mylot, then, you have reason to be concerned. Trust your own instincts. Is your husband the type who could be conned into believing she is the helpless type? Is she calling you to make you think that there is no reason for you to doubt her intentions? Is she reporting to you so that you will not be suspicious or to make sure you are aware that she is around? You have to consider what her motives may be in calling your husband and asking for favors when she has her own husband.
@deedee328 (1122)
• United States
12 Feb 12
The only person who can answer the "what will he do " question is your husband. I think that since you believe he is a good man, you have to keep on believing him until HE gives you a reason not to. I also think you may want to sit down and have a real serious talk with him about this. Tell him how you feel and get his thoughts on how the neighbor is behaving. I fear that you will remain in a constant state of turmoil if you dwell on the "what ifs" too much, so talk to him and put your mind at ease.
@tkonlinevn (6447)
• Vietnam
9 Feb 12
There are too many questions for this situation !
One thing, I believe that my husband is a good man. But what'll be happened if she tries to change him?
@cerebellum (3863)
• United States
6 Feb 12
It is possible that they are just being friendly. For your own peace of mind, you should talk to your husband and tell him your suspicions. Sometimes men are kind of thick and don't see things the way women do.
@tkonlinevn (6447)
• Vietnam
9 Feb 12
I believe that my husband understand what I'm thinking about this story. But he doesn't say anything to me. I don't know why.
@haopee (493)
• Philippines
6 Feb 12
You need to have a talk with her, set some boundaries and just tell her frankly that you are uncomfortable with the way she does things with your husband. Don't cast doubt on your husband, but you do have to tell him that you and his friend spoke regarding this matter. Just so your husband wouldn't be so surprised if he ever knew about it.
@tkonlinevn (6447)
• Vietnam
9 Feb 12
After this discussion, whether she'll go to our home? I think she'll be shy and she won't see us after that.
@enelym001 (8322)
• Philippines
6 Feb 12
If you think she is becoming a threat to you and your husband, then I think you have to talk to your husband and find out what she thinks about this lady sending him a gift. If he sees her as a sister only and this girl looks up to your husband as her big brother then only, then there is nothing for you to be worried about.
@tkonlinevn (6447)
• Vietnam
9 Feb 12
My husband said that he sees her as a sister and she's too. But I feeling that there are some wrong things between them. So, I'm worrying. She tries to make a good relation with me. I don't know this good or not?
@ecaron (678)
• Canada
6 Feb 12
I would say be careful and keep an eye on the situation. It concerns me when a woman takes an interest in my husband especially if she starts giving gifts and calling and texting. I trust my husband that he would never cheat on me but I get a little jealous when he flirts a little with waitresses but he explained that he is just being friendly and that's all, he loves me and would never pursue someone. I would confront that woman that is so interested in your husband and just ask her what her intentions are concerning him, if she just wants to be friends then encourage her to be your friend also and include you in everything she wants to do concerning your husband.
@tkonlinevn (6447)
• Vietnam
9 Feb 12
Great! thank you for you advice. I think that this is the best way to solve my problem. I'm trying to do like this. I hope that all everything will be better in the next.
@beamer88 (4259)
• Philippines
6 Feb 12
I hope there's none but if the girl's actuation can really cast some doubt. I mean, it's okay to be friendly but I think the girl is being too friendly to your husband, and I don't blame you for worrying a little. But there's really only one way to clear matters up. You have to discuss this with your husband and tell him what you feel about the situation.
@tkonlinevn (6447)
• Vietnam
9 Feb 12
You're right. I really have a little worrying about her. Because she is too close with my husband. Her parents like husband too. They usually call to him and sending gifts to him. She said to me about these, of course. But I'm still not comfortable.
@tkonlinevn (6447)
• Vietnam
9 Feb 12
she's student. She's younger than me and my husband. She was my husband's neighbor. They used to be close in past.
@jagjit273 (1754)
• India
12 Feb 12
Don't let the warm of doubt grow in your mind. Just keep doing your chores for your husband. If there is something you can't stop it, if there is nothing, dont spoil your family's peace.
@pari677 (11)
•
11 Feb 12
this is not good for your family you should be careful but take your husband into the confidence and make him sure that he should only br freind not go to close be frenly and keep eye on neighborhood
