I don't know what to do

@Trace86 (5033)
United States
March 27, 2012 8:21pm CST
I suspect that someone close to me stole some jewelry that was given to me as a gift. I have a lot of jewelry in my box, but I am fairly sure that several sentimental pieces are missing. Should I confront the person I suspect? How do you go about doing that? What if I am wrong?
1 person likes this
11 responses
• United States
29 Mar 12
Is it possible that you misplaced it? Or are there other people with easy access to your jewelry box? If the answer to both of these is "no," you should probably do as others have advised. Casually mention the missing pieces to the person and watch for his/her reaction. If you have the person help you search for the pieces, you may find that they "mysteriously" are found. If you can establish with pretty good certainty that the person is responsible for the missing pieces, and they are not returned, you should refrain from allowing that person in your space again. You may also want to let it be known within your social circle about how things "mysteriously" disappear when that particular person is around; the easiest way to do this is to seek out the worst gossip and tell her/him that this is "just between you." That will guarantee that everyone knows within a matter of hours. Be certain of the person's culpability and lack of remorse before you do so, however.
2 people like this
@drannhh (15235)
• United States
29 Mar 12
Hi wilsongoddard. You have some good people skills there. It would be nice if the jewelry were to be "found."
@drannhh (15235)
• United States
29 Mar 12
I would be very unwilling to take a chance on wrongly confronting another person over such an issue, so if I did not know for sure I would leave it alone, but take better precautions in future. Now that almost everyone has a digital camera, it is easy to take pictures of anything new that is of value either in $ or sentiment. I hate to have to go to the trouble of locking up valuables, but it is pretty much a necessity in this day and age.
1 person likes this
@Trace86 (5033)
• United States
2 Apr 12
I just hate to think someone in my own family would steal from me. However, the person I am thinking of was having money troubles not that long ago and may have pawned my items. I know they wouldn't wear the stuff in front of me. My missing items are unique and sentimental. Plus I have a fairly photographic memory when it comes to jewelry.
@Sindrum91 (254)
• United States
28 Mar 12
That's a real tough position you're in. I'm sorry for you. Let me give you a personal experience that might offer some help. One time a few years back i thought a close friend of mine took something personal of mine. In fact i was sure of it. I actually approached them, and told them i knew they had done it and I wanted it back. To make a long story short we got into a heated argument. And Didn't talk for months. Within that time frame, Yup you guessed it. My stuff showed up. I had left it in some dirty jeans. In a hamper for weeks. washed it and all. Found it when i was putting my clothes away. My friend and I are on speaking terms now, but I can honestly say it has effected our relationship. I don't feel like we trust one another anymore. And a lot of that is my fault for assuming. Just make sure you know for sure before you make the mistake i made. I couldn't apologize enough and you will most likely feel the same way. Good luck. And most importantly I really really hope you find your jewelry one way or another. There is nothing worse than feeling cheated or as if something you care about is gone. I'm crossing my fingers for it to just be misplaced, a win win situation for you. You get your jewelry and no uncomfortable confrontation. ;)
@ElicBxn (61041)
• United States
28 Mar 12
if they are pretty close, rather than confronting them, maybe ask them if they can help you look for them, explaining when you do that they are sentimental. If they are guilty, maybe they will "find" them later...
1 person likes this
• India
28 Mar 12
First of all make sure that HE or SHE is the one has lost your jewelry. Never call any one as thief becuase this will surely break your relations. So make sure that he or she is the one who had took it and go for it.
1 person likes this
• India
28 Mar 12
I really do not think that person will confess his/her theft unless he/she gets caught. I would suggest that you should call that person to your place and while talking, show her (assuming the person is a girl) some of your jewellery especially the gifted ones. Make sure no other outsider is at your place at that time. Then giving an excuse come out from the room leaving her alone there. Also make a list of the jewellery pieces you will be showing her so that you can tally later. Then coming back to the room again take the jewellery box in your hand and start saying that you lost some of your jewellery recently and so have made a list of the items that you have to keep a check. Then quickly take out the list and start tallying, if she would have stolen anything from that box in your absence, then you will find it out immediately and if not at least she'll get the impression that you keep a record of everything. Also you can say you are thinking to launch a complain against the theft. I am sure if she is the culprit she'll quit stealing your jewellery after listening this.
1 person likes this
@kingparker (9693)
• United States
28 Mar 12
That is really tough decision to make though. You don't know that person really do it or not, and you simply go up to him/her and accuse them stole your jewelry, that just kind of risky, and you probably would lose your friendship with them. If you can't get any substantial evidence, I can't just go up and ask them this kind of question. Why not investigate further, then make this decision.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
28 Mar 12
I think, that was really a hard situation. I experience that before too but I was that person who they think stole something form our friend. We do not communicate now because they accused without even asking me. I think you'd better confront your friend but in a nice way. I know she will understand.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
28 Mar 12
Hi! In your case, the merew fact that your suspect is your friend, its quite hard. If you really know in yourself that he/she is the only person who knows your jewelry box, then its a plus sign. Maybe you should ask her first if she had seen her something like that. And then step by step try to catch her until you find out if she really did that.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (51138)
• United States
28 Mar 12
I don't know where to even beging to advise you. That's so tricky. Could you tell them you are missing these pieces, and then have them help you look for them? They might give something away by their reaction to your request. I'm assuming this person does not live with you. I would also get every person in my house to search it up and down. But I guess I wouldn't flat out accuse unless I was at least 95% sure.
1 person likes this
• India
16 Jul 12
In cases like these, the best thing to do is to lock up your jewelry in a safe place. If you feel determined to find out if it was them or not, then simply create a scenario where you control all the variables. Count your jewelry. Use a little notebook and name and number each piece that you have. This may sound like a lot of work, but not if you are losing more than just jewelry.