unfair parents

I am a parent already since 28 years. My eldest just became 28 my youngest 6 years old. I don't know your parents so I have to respond on what you say. I wonder where the positive respond of your parents is. How do they motivate you and your brother? I don't hear anything about: well done. So they are only picking on you because of the A-? Or do they think: if your brother is not allowed to play games you are not either (since it's easier)? I think it's hard if you leave kids home alone to do homework and playing instruments etc (reason why your mom doesn't know what you really do). I think homework should be done first but also there should be time to play (not matter what it is to relax or give the mind a break from homework/school/worries). I don't know your age and your brothers but I think 9pm is a normal time at weekdays to go to bed. My youngest two go to bed at 7pm and wake up at 7pm every day of the week. My parents were always picking on me too (and my siblings) No grade was high enough we always had to be the best. It's very annoying and I think it had more to do with them as with us (both are high educated and wanted us to follow in their footsteps as well). I would advice you to write down how you feel (like you did here) and try to open their eyes about what is really going on. As long as you do your homework and have good grades it should not be a problem at all to be "addicted" to playing games. make a schedule when you do what (incl. the gaming) and give it to them (or leave it on the table) and wait for an answer. I hope you can open their eyes that way, that your dad will stand for you but also that your parents won't treat you the same way. You both are individuals and are different. If you do what is expected you should not be punished for that. So I agree with you, your parents are unfair but also not very interested in you as a person/your feelings. If you leave your kids home alone, expect so much from them, them have rights as well. That is how it always worked and still is working over here between me and my kids.

are you the oldest?? that's the way it was for me too. always had to make sure everything was taken care of and if they made a mistake, i was blamed for it. but to punish you for their bad grades, that's going too far. i make each of my child be responsible for their own actions. the only advice that i could give is, keep your eyes on the future. work toward goals that you know that you can keep and be somebody. good job on the great grades. keep it up. one day you can be awarded a scholarship to a college.

I agree with you. Why punish YOU when YOU didn't mess up? I have four siblings and I would be pretty ticked if I got in trouble or punished for THEIR bad grades or their bad behavior, unless it was my fault they were misbehaving. I am also a parent, and I try to allow each kid to stand on their own merits - if one doesn't participate or do well at school or fails something, whoever did that loses privelages, not EVERYBODY. I might sit everybody down and explain that if anybody ELSE decided to stop working to their ability level or goof off, or even play games too often and perhaps not listen and do things like pick up after yourself, get enough sleep, do chores, etc BECAUSE you'd rather play games - then I would take them away from everybody. Often it's an attitude we see coming. I've been in every situation... I remember having piano lessons as a kid and I hated it. Of course NOW, 30 years later, it would be nice to have that skill. I also used to play the flute and I recall getting so bored practicing. My daughter does karate and has also done ballet and tap, soccer, basketball, etc. There are times when she LOVES everything. There are times when she is whiny and doesn't want to go. We have to pay for everything though, so I tell her if she wanted to do something badly enough to get me to sign her up, that means she is doing it for the length of time we signed up for lol. Just the way it is... when I was young and I signed up for a sport, I did it for the season. There's no quitting. I also like games, my daughter likes to play the Wii, I like MMORPGS. I don't play at all like I used to, but I still do and it irritates me when people try to make judgements about video games. To each his own, you know? In my opinion, people who don't like them and try to build a case against them are the kinds of people who can't control themselves, so they just want to make them look bad so they don't have to face their own personal lack of control and failings lol. Just my two cents. My older kids enjoyed video games too, and so does my husband.

Your mother had done it just for your own good, please be understandable. She wasn't punishing you and your other brother, it was just that she afraid that you might fail one of your grade if you won't consider the bad affect of those video games. You might consider spend some time on mylot and make some extra money would be practical. I hope that your mom would lift the sanction against that video game.