Do you feel registries are tacky? (baby, wedding, etc)
By mommyboo
@mommyboo (13174)
United States
March 29, 2012 8:33am CST
Some people obviously feel this way given the way some people talk about 'how dare they ask for a $200 baby crib' or 'I can't even afford ONE pan much less a SET'... blah blah blah.
I'm in the middle about these because I don't like getting someone a useless gift. For people I know very well, I don't even really need a registry, although I do LIKE to know what they NEED and the style of it - like if a close friend is having a baby and they need a baby sling and prefer it to be black so they can get their husband to occasionally wear the baby without running from the cute little pink flowered baby print, hey, I'll do it. I also like having access to a registry if say I collected money from a group or office pool and we are going in on a large gift or a combined 'set' of items together - that way we can put together a basket that includes a bunch of baby care items, 4 packages of diapers, and a little hamper for the baby's room.
I agree that people should be KIND when putting things on the registry and include smaller or lower priced items or suggestions of things someone might be able to purchase elsewhere for cheaper or even make - like burp cloths, onesies, and for wedding gifts, it would be nice to have a way for people to donate to fund something, like a vacation for the new couple or for a photography session. That way, someone who can afford to donate a few hundred might do that, but someone else who only has $10 for a gift can also do that, and both to me are equally helpful and well thought.
People don't always need THINGS, but I do still think people appreciate gifts and being thought of.
1 person likes this
5 responses
@TheIzers (680)
•
30 Mar 12
I agree with you, it is not fair to put such a burden on friend/ family or people who care about us for some gifts. This is also the reason why I did not put such an expensive stuffs (crib, stroller bedding set) on my baby registry last year. It was not that I don't need them, as new mother of course I will need one for my baby but as I said it was not fair to put such burden especially in the economy hardship like now. and I was so glad that my husband agree with me. I put everything that cost less than $50 lucky us that my husband manager she took care the gifts from my husband colleagues and decided to collect them together and not to but anything them give us in money so we can use it to get whatever we need. I think what she had done was very thoughtful and a great idea, I think about do the same one day when I have relative or close friend wedding/baby shower.
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
8 Apr 12
Many times I have gone in on a larger gift for a baby shower with other people so we can get the person what they'd really like. If 10 people can each afford $20, that means you can get someone a travel system or a crib if that's what they really need and can't afford themselves 
@Kojigirl (188)
•
29 Mar 12
Many years ago, when I was a lot younger and slightly frivolous, a friend of mine told me that she had registered her baby for gifts. I honestly thought she was joking, since she hadn't even sprogged yet. But, being a reasonable and broad-minded person, I went to the store in question (which I thought massively presumptuous) and had a gander at what she wanted.
Then I phoned her and told her to go and whistle for it.
I've known a LOT of people who've had babies, and very few take the mickey to her extent, but I find the whole thing a bit on the much side of things if we're talking babies.
Weddings are equally annoying. But to that extent, I can understand where they are coming from. But they do push the boundaries most of the time. I often wonder if they actually get all the stuff they ask for. One couple I know of asked for a coffee maker that was over two hundred bucks, and this was back in the eighties! They didn't get that, I do know. She was still complaining about it at the divorce.
I don't think the registries themselves are tacky, I think the aspirations of those making the lists are tacky. There is only so much you need for babies or setting up a house, but it really would be nice if the people in question would get their heads out of the clouds (or specific anatomical locations) and get serious. Especially with the economy the way it is.
1 person likes this
@nezavisima (7408)
• Bulgaria
29 Mar 12
very good discussion.
I can tell you is that people do not always need gifts.
gift is a kind of respect can but sometimes it is better to give a person money otklokoto gift because nowadays so.
not everyone could afford expensive things baby clothes shoes baby bedding and so on.
many people see when they receive the gift's value rather than that which is intended for, I completely agree with you.
thanks for the discussion.
nice day!
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
6 Apr 12
I don't think I would personally ask for gifts or even register but I appreciate when other people do lol! At least if they can give me an idea of things they like or need it helps me. I like to get personal gifts for people I'm close to, for people I don't know well I would rather they have a registry so I can choose something they actually want and will use. When you don't know someone well, it's way too easy to choose something that may not be their taste or isn't useful unless you give a gift card or cash.
@AidaLily (1450)
• United States
29 Mar 12
I don't like registries. I made one once for a baby shower because my mother absolutely told me I had to have a gift registry. When it came time for my wedding, I told everyone that they didn't need to get gifts. My husband and I had been together a little more than four years and had lived on our own. We saved up and brought most of the stuff we needed and have it now.
There were small things that people got for us when we moved again like dishes or towels, but other than that we didn't need any of it.
In fact, we asked everyone for nothing more than gift cards if they wanted to get us something. We told them where gift cards would be most useful of course but then told the people who didn't want to go to an actual store that those debit card gift cards would work as well...and that was ONLY if they wanted to get them.
I think registries are tacky because there is always that one person who gets upset if you don't get the exact item and the fact that i know people who constantly check the registries to see if they are getting what they want.
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
8 Apr 12
If people didn't put so much stuff on registries, maybe it wouldn't be so bad. People should use it as a tool and be reasonable, after all, it's supposed to be for ideas. I like gift cards too but some people feel they are really cold and impersonal, no matter how much you'd ACTUALLY LIKE TO GET THEM lol.
