How could being Single is better than being Married? Please Explain.

Philippines
April 18, 2012 6:21pm CST
I'm single. And I am afraid to be single forever. Some of my friends say that being single is better than being married. How could that be? I don't want to be alone for all of my life. I need someone to sleep with, to eat with, to hold hands and to love. Sometime I feel happy being single but there are a lot of times I feel horrible. Yeah, being single means having freedom but whenever I see couples I feel like all alone. Anyway, I have to enjoy being single. I shouldn't be worried too much about that. Someday , my man will come. haha
2 people like this
12 responses
• Philippines
19 Apr 12
being single is fun because as you say you have the freedom to do all you want. nobody will get mad if you do the things you like which they dont like and no one will tell you what to do, no one will like "monitor" the things that you are currently doing. simply you are just being free. being married is a huge responsibility. maybe you might miss your single life by the time you enter the married life. have fun being single! its a blessing!
2 people like this
• United States
20 May 12
Yeah when a person is single they have so much more freedom. Most of the time they only have to think about what they want to do and what they would like to accomplish. A single person has the freedom to go as they please and not have to worry about considering someone else's thoughts on the matter. Yes I would definitely encourage those who are single to enjoy it. As once you are married there is a lot of responsibility that comes with it.
• United States
20 Apr 12
everyone wants what they can't have in this case your not married so you want to be! but you shouldn't worry about it to much you'll find someone and you will be happy but just enjoy all the freedom you have know because why your married you won't be able to do all the things that you like to do because you have other priories
1 person likes this
• United States
20 May 12
You make a really good point. We all seem to want something else. When we are single we want to be married. When we are married we want to be single. It's just a hard cycle to break. So we should strive to make the most of whatever current situation we find ourselves in.
@lizzyt2007 (1312)
• Craig, Alaska
19 Apr 12
I have been married twice and divorced twice. I've now been single for many years. I think that its a person's actually personal preface to want to be single and be happy. Sometimes I am happy cause of the independence I have and I make the rules in my house for my son. but other times I do miss being married and would like to one day. my son misses having a father and I miss the love, companionship and fatherly direction for my son. other times I say I am fine and don't need extra direction in my household. I just leave it in God's hand to find me Mr. right. I stopped searching since my last divorce. I am so sick of divorce and never want one again. If you contemplating which is better being single or married just talk to others you know well about their single life or married life and decide weather its best for you.
• United States
20 May 12
Yeah being single gives a person a lot more independence than when a person is married. And like you mentioned you are able to make the rules and set the boundaries for how your child is raised. It is definitely a good thing to talk with those who are married if a person wants to get married. They will definitely help a person to appreciate the blessings and the hardships that come with marriage. As sometime single individuals who haven't been married may only think of getting married.
@superbadx (484)
• Malaysia
19 Apr 12
I wouldn't say being single is better than being married. I would rather say, being single is better than in a relationships without the ending. Being married is somehow one of the great thing we get while we lived since we can live together with someone we truly love and take a good care of them and never being alone. Getting married is like a love story which the couple live happily ever after, of course based on how you handle your marriage. Being in a relationship on the other hand is like a movie where the ending we will see the couple kissing each other and being happy, but what we viewers don't know is what happens next, because the films only rolls until the part where they we're happy.
1 person likes this
@UIUI356 (42)
• China
19 Apr 12
For my part,single is also very good.many people want get out of single because they can not find how to live in single. you can maked many friends .most of the time ,you are working.if you are free,you can call your friends to travel,shopping ,coffe or something. singledays could be very happy than married.
• United States
20 May 12
Yeah I agree with you. A lot of people find it hard to live their life as a single person. A lot of single individuals hate being alone. They want to find someone to share their life with. It is a good thing for individuals who are single to spend time with family and friends to fill the void of loneliness.
• Philippines
19 Apr 12
I think it depends on your outlook and priorities in life. I am also single for quite a while now and I am not bothered with it especially after seeing friends who tied the knots but got separated after a time. What I love about being single is the yes, the freedom to do what you want without being liable to some explanation. Also, being single for me means exploring the endless possibilities that life has to offer. Right now I am just enjoying the ride. I've been doing a lot of travels to wherever I feel like it. If I am a married woman with kids to handle, I probably couldn't do the things that I am doing right now. I can quit my job if I feel like it because I don't have much responsibilities as compare to some of my friends who have been putting up with bad bosses and being underpaid. There are perks about being a single woman, but there are some low points too, just like what you have mentioned. Whenever I feel as if I don;t have someone to be with when I don;t want to be alone, I always have my family and friends for support, so I guess I'm pretty much enjoying the journey. But then again, I am not closing my door. and just like you, I believe that it it is meant to be, one day, my prince charming will come at the right place and at the right time.
1 person likes this
@rekhum (2420)
• India
19 Apr 12
I think no one really would want to stay single for their entire life. But one should make the most of their single lives when they are single.
• Malaysia
20 Apr 12
This is really true and i am working hard to make most of my single life before getting a girlfriend or even married. Honestly, i think those people who want to stay single for lifetime would eventually felt something deep in their hearts to actually have a family of their own. Maybe today they were still young and like the life they had now, but in the future, who knows what they would think of marriage.
@SinfulRose (3527)
• Davao, Philippines
19 Apr 12
Honestly, I don't want to be married. I don't even plan to have a boyfriend in this lifetime. It may sound sad for others but what do they know if my choice of being single until I die makes me happy? I guess the advantage of being single is lesser financial problems, more time to help your original family, lesser relationship problems, fast implementation of your plans--because you don't have to talk a certain matter with your partner every single time you make a decision--and many other things. I'm selfish, I don't want to share. I'm rude so I'll only end up hurting those who can be intimately close to me. I have too many flaws compared to what I can do best. It's a personality like mine that will make me stay alone for the rest of my life.
• Davao, Philippines
19 Apr 12
I think I understand. Marriage life for some is like being open to more problems, responsibilities and more growing, on their part,in life. However, you should know more than me that marriage is not a game for only one to play. It's a partnership of two people. No one is the alpha or the beta. "It takes two to tango"? Well, understanding those things requires one to have a partner that really is compatible with you. The problem is, no person can keep up with someone like me. And I'd rather not look for such a person or wait--I'd be wasting precious time and energy--when I can use those to fix certain things in the present. Besides, it would be foolish of me to add more wood into my problems that's already burning me out. If ever come a time I would fall for a person, I would let him go. Because if I love him, I will do my best to keep that person away from me.
• Davao, Philippines
20 Apr 12
Seems like it...the guy would really have to move mountains--but I wish not for me. I am thankful for your words but at the same time saddened. Saddened not because that I will never understand the feelings of wishing to be married and have any kids but saddened of the thought if I should be with a husband and kids in the future. And I do not merely mean the things I've mentioned above. Have a nice day and Happy MyLotting!
• Malaysia
19 Apr 12
All i would say is that all of this is based on the perspective of someone on what the marriage is all about. If someone thinks that marriage is all about problems like kids, short on cash, arguing with partners, and all that, that's why they would think marriage is a bad thing or just not for them. But for some and most people, marriage is some kind of a quest, a long term one where they accept the challenge and try to solve it. Think of it as a game, like the GTA. You would be bored after a short time if you play the freeplay mode which you don't go for the missions, but instead you just opens all kind of cheats you knew and make a havoc at the streets burning cars and killing people. It's very different if you go and play the missions provided because you would be more concentrated to finish all the missions where you actually play the game what the creator make it for. I don't know if you actually understand what i am saying since my English is not good enough, or i myself think it's bad. Well, worth a shot right.
@airasheila (5454)
• Philippines
19 Apr 12
good day tess_quinain, that main topic of yours is an expression by many. that, line was one of the famous line which is being expressed by anyone especially if they found out that you are still single. because for those people who says that, being single is kind a less responsibility since a presence of a husband and children is not around. aside from that, you don't need to do additional things aside from taking care of yourself alone. however, what they always say are some of the advantages that they are just thinking, hence, they are not really aware that what they are thinking is not the one that you are aspiring to have. like in your situation, that according to you, you are somehow feeling alone whenever you saw couples around you, which means, you are not really that happy being alone and single.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
26 Apr 12
I smile when I read the topic of your conversation. It is hard to understand this completely until you are married. But if you work hard to enjoy the advantages of being single you will appreciate this when you get married. You will then have experienced the best of both world's. I understand what you are saying. No one really wants to be alone. I have felt similar ways that you have when I was single. And now that I'm married I understand and appreciate what others had been trying to tell me. Yes some day you will be with a nice loving man. Until that time comes make sure you know exactly what you want and what goals and attributes you want that person to have. This will help you to make a better decision when it comes to a husband.
• United States
20 May 12
Yeah I completely understand you and know where you are coming from. I too use to feel that way before I was married. I would feel so sad because I was single. I thought that it was really the worst thing. And I couldn't understand and appreciate when others who were married tried to encourage me to enjoy being single. I would think well of course they can say those things because they have someone to share their life with. Now though my marriage is having rough times. I'm not sure what is going to be the outcome of these trials we are facing. But I know that sometimes I think about how I would feel if I were single. I do hope though that we will be able to work thorough these problems.
• United States
20 May 12
I also wanted to add that I hope that your marriage will improve as well. We love our spouse that's why we married them. It's just difficult to endure the problems when it seems that the bad out weights the good. Thanks for sharing your experience with me.
• Canada
30 Apr 12
Yes, I agree, you won't appreciate being single until you get married. I remembered that every time I saw a couple holding hands, I longed to have someone to love me and to be married. But now that I'm married, I see all the problems and I rather be single again.
1 person likes this
@Kat1023 (42)
• Canada
24 Apr 12
Being single in a bad thing as least you don't need to answer to anyone. You can go on trips with friends and you can buy anything you want. So enjoy your freedom while you can :) And don't worry, your man will come, just be patient.
19 Apr 12
Being in a relationship and being single both have their perks!.. If you're single, you are free to do what you want without someone keeping eye on you're every action and checking what you're up to. You can go out and party till you drop.. but then again... you're missing the feeling of having someone to be always be there for you. Someone you can talk to, go home to at the end of the day.. Sometimes, life is not all fun and it's a human need to be needed by others.. But to have a fulfilling and happy marriage, one must not just settle for just anyone. You need to find the one. As they say, marry you're bestfriend. You're gonna need someone you can talk to and be yourself around that person. Better be single than be stuck in a crappy relationship. :)
• Philippines
19 Apr 12
exactly! No matter how I try to enjoy myself with my friends and enjoy doing my hobbies I still feel lonely. The fact that I had been in a relationship for six years, I still long to have someone with me.