People Changed...
By Lucas818
@Lucas818 (377)
May 5, 2012 5:09am CST
Hi myLotters, have any of you experience things like I'm going to share? 2 years ago, I know a guy in a company. He joined 1 week after me. We're not in same department but we were quite friends, I mean, hang out, lunch etc. Somehow, 2 months ago, he was assigned to become leader in his division, and I can't help but I feel that he's getting arrogant. He no longer talk with us, and he turned out to be so phony and cocky. His character is totally different than before. This situation makes me wonder, should I still need to be friend with him?
What your suggestions, meLotters?
1 person likes this
5 responses
@ARIES1973 (11426)
• Legaspi, Philippines
5 May 12
Change is good if it's for the better. But if someone has changed his character because he thought that he is superior already and other people are not within his level, this is another thing to consider. Well anyway, some things also pass. Maybe you just have to go on with the flow for the meantime and wait for him to realize his own actions. If after sometime he continuous to act that way, that would be the time for you to decide.
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
5 May 12
I don't think it has anything to do with tbinking you're better than anyone else. Things automatically change whether you want them to or not. When I moved from aide to charge nurse that was a difficult change. I couldn't have favorites. Then when I changed from charge nurse to supervisor it was even harder because now I'm the one that has to handle all the personell problems. I'm the one that has to do write ups. I'm the one that has to send people home if they've had more than 3 write ups. I might have to discipline someone whom I count as a friend. It's part of the job. I can't have favorites. If anyone wants me to play favorites with them, they have to know they have no right to ask that.
I think it's more of a perception that workers have of their co-workers who move up. Their co-worker moves up. You don't move up and you feel the change. It's something you have to get accustomed to. Change happens. People move up. They can't have favorites and hang out when their job description changes to one of authority.
@ARIES1973 (11426)
• Legaspi, Philippines
5 May 12
Actually, I am on the same side of the person, Lucas mentioned, who moves up. I am promoted on to several steps at one-time event. But I never thought that I have changed in one way or another as to the way I deal with my colleagues. Although you are correct, some people might think of it negatively especially those who were directly affected. But what Lucas is saying is about the character that is clearly manifested on his friend's actions. Well anyway, we look at things on a different perspective.
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
5 May 12
Of course he is going to change. He us in charge now. He's not on the same level with you at work anymore. He has to treat everyone the same. He cannot have favorites and hang out anymore. Maybe you feel that he has pulled away from you, but the truth is...he kind of has to. I have been in that situation myself. I went from being a CNA to being a charge nurse after finishing nursing school. It was a difficult transition. I had to change from crew to crew chief, so to speak.
I still had my friends to some degree but I also had to give and get respect. If I had to write someone up or discipline someone, I couldn't let friendships from doing my job. The crew has to adjust when one of it's members moves up. Until you've been there you may not fully understand how difficult it is to maintain good working relationships with people you once worked with side by side.
@Lucas818 (377)
•
6 May 12
Hi ms, it seems to me that you're a big deal in your department, I respect you. Somehow my friend, he is just a lead in his department, he's not even a supervisor or department manager. Me and him are different department though. I has to say that I really can't accept his attitude and behavioral changed. Guess I just have to keep a distance with him. :)
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
5 May 12
it is petty common for people to change and through out histpry i xam say this friend of yours is not the first person who changed when their work position has changed or they havemoved up the corporate lasder. Some people have really low eq i think that these get into their heads and that they feel since rhey were promoted they are better than everyone else.
@Victoria222 (675)
• Russian Federation
5 May 12
yes, they think they are better than everyone around. but when they need help they become so miserable. ;/
@Victoria222 (675)
• Russian Federation
5 May 12
yeah, i do not knot about people in yourcountry. but i can say that people in my country changed a lot. it does not depend on their position. they think alot about themselves even if they are nothing. it hurts sometimes.
@viji_v2 (727)
• India
5 May 12
One such person was present in my dad's office. He is so silent and calm and after getting his promotion he just showed his true color. When he was changed his place he never invited him to his home. From that day many of his colleagues decided to avoid him and not to bother. It is safe way.
