leaving or staying?
By mluvko2_24
@mluvko2_24 (7)
May 23, 2012 6:40am CST
i'm a single parent with a dauther,,,my sister offered me to go abroad,,,,to find a job,,but im having second thouht abaout leaving my dauther,,,
i grow up with my gradmother who take care of us beacuse of the same situation,,and a I promse my self then that i will never do that to my kid,,,but then again here i'm,,history repeating it self,,,
dont get me wrong,,i have a great childhood,,its just that, this will be very hard for me to be away with my dauther,,,but i also need a job,,
9 responses
@Nikhabele (166)
• South Africa
24 May 12
I personally don't stay with my daughter, she stays with my mum and she's happy. But the bottom line is, she misses me and I miss her more and I feel bad, as if I'm failing her, although this saddens my mum. Whenever I say that, she thinks it's because I think she's not a good " mother" to my daughter and thats not why I miss my baby so much. I miss her because I miss a lot of her milestones.
Go with your daughter if you cant stay with her but then again, how will you survive.
@mluvko2_24 (7)
•
24 May 12
hello Nikhable,,thats is also how i felt,,as if im failing her if i cant be with her especialy if she have school activity,,and it scare me not seeing very stage of her life,,as if it just passes without me by her side,,,
but you also right,,i need to be prepared for her future,,thank u,,
@raganator27 (104)
• United States
23 May 12
This is tough. Do what your heart is saying deep down inside of you.
@mluvko2_24 (7)
•
24 May 12
thank u ragator27,,it is realy tough,,my heart saying "Stay" and my mind saying "Go", for a better future,,,think,, think,, think,,and i soon i have to decide,,:-(
I am sure you can find a job in your country- so that you can still be with your daughter.. maybe just until she reaches high school.
@PhillyDreamer (3039)
• United States
23 May 12
I think you would be making a big mistake. Jobs are a means for us to take care of our families, but they aren't meant to replace our families. I worked for years, and missed so many things in my kids lives because I was too focused on making money. I think you should stick with your daughter and tough it out. You'll find a job that allows you to earn money and spend time with your daughter.
@mluvko2_24 (7)
•
24 May 12
thank you for the response Phillydreamer,,,thats also what im thinking,,,as the saying goes,,we cant buy happiness in this world,,,
and for me seeing my daughter developments and achievemts brings me great fullfillment in life,,,
thank u gain,,,
@cttolledo (5460)
• Legaspi, Philippines
24 May 12
I suggest you to think about it, think what is truly most important to you..you should define what really matters to you..
If what is important to you is your family, find some alternatives work than working abroad. For me you can integrate work, family & home .. just live simply...what is important is you spent time with your kid,discovering the world anew together, raising a kid is the most important and rewarding job that you will ever had in your life.
@mikyung (2232)
• Philippines
23 May 12
I think what is important now is the future of of your daughter. At this trying times, we need to make sacrifices for our own and our loved ones betterment - in the long run. Also, you may consider the compensation, it should be higher compared to a local job in your place. I think if everything is definite and everything is in place in your work abroad - It is a good idea to leave for a while for a greener pasture.Your parents will surely take good care of your daughter. What is 1 or 2 years of sacrifice compared to a future of abundance.
@mluvko2_24 (7)
•
24 May 12
hi mikyung thank you for the response,,i agree,,i need to decide for the better future of my dauther,
@littleheart (17)
• China
24 May 12
I understand your situation,but this is a problem make me very confused,why don't you get a job locally, but go abroad to find work?Can you explain more about that?For your daughter now that you have promised yourself,i hope you keep your promise,your daughter's future should be the first thing to consider.You can have lots of jobs during your life,but there is only one daughter,nothing can instead of her.
@Chikazz12 (35)
• Philippines
23 May 12
You can try working abroad for 2 to 3 years. And if good fortune comes, maybe you can bring your daughter with you in the future. There's a lot of modern way of communicating now so I believe you can always find ways to talk to your daughter. I grew up far from my parents but I never felt sad since they always made a point to contact me. :)
