living in before marriage

Philippines
June 5, 2012 4:21am CST
hello there my friends. I just want to share with you my sentiments on living in beore marriage. I think that this status takes out the excitement of being together with your boyfriend in one house before marriage. I dont like this test drive thing. but then some would say that living in is a way to know if you are able to connect with each other and live together easily. what are your opinion guys?
1 person likes this
9 responses
@ShyBear88 (54359)
• United States
5 Jun 12
I disagree you with because it is kind of correct how do you know your going to get alone with someone if you never live with them and learn to live with each other. Once your married and see what its like living with each other you might find deal breakers and might not like how they live and you can't change your partner and you might not want to change for them. Its a risk. There isn't anything wrong with living with each other it doesn't take away the excitment of being married and learning what is a marriage and expanding your relationship with each other. It is the next step in to getting to know your partner and what you do and do not want form a partner. I live with my husband before we got married I'm just as excited about living with him then as I do now. I love it it hasn't change anything. We drive each other nuts but we live with those craziness all of the time. Not because we have to but because we just love each other and we can over look certain things.
• Philippines
6 Jul 12
hi there shybear! i do respect your opinion and I understand that there are different views on this. It is your life and my life and I think we have our own decisions and live life the way we want it to be. thank you for sharing your views! happy mylotting!
@ShyBear88 (54359)
• United States
8 Jul 12
Yes there is many views on living with people weather your married or not. It all depends kind of on how you raised and what a person is comfortable with. I'm all for at least for myself living with the person I was going to marry before we got married. Everything worked out for me and my husband. Never and issues living with each other before getting married. Although certain families members did have and issues but they got over it once they saw how well me and my husband get alone. It was like hell for us not living together we missed each other so bad we would stay up really late just to see each other. So it was a lot better for us under one roof. I know not everyone is comfortabel with that but there isn't anything wrong with it. It give you and inside to what it might be like once your married so I feel that someone should test the water instead of just jumping in after they get married but only if it's what that person and there partner are wanting to doing.
• Philippines
10 Jul 12
i believe that we must live our lives according to our own rules and values. we must evaluate what is more important to us, our own inner voice or what the other people will say about us.
@Mashnn (4502)
5 Jun 12
I think I support come with stay kind of thing before marriage. This can give time to really have a glimpse of what you expect in the coming marriage and decide whether you are ready for marriage or not.
• Philippines
10 Jun 12
hi there mashnn! I do respect your opinion about that. Maybe there are kind of testdriving the relationship when they are already in one roof. Maybe it will be good for them but for me I will lose the excitement.
@Mashnn (4502)
10 Jun 12
Unfortunately, whether you live together or not before getting married. Any marriage entails alot of committment or else it will not work.
• Philippines
11 Jun 12
I agree. it takes commitment and courage to be in a marriage!
• United States
6 Jul 12
I lived with my bf for 5 years before we got married. It is a great way to know if you can stand each other all the time and know if he is right for you or not. I have known friends that married and moved in after and it was a big shock to them how the other one lived. Whether it be messy, liking things a certain way etc...
• Philippines
6 Jul 12
hi there laura leigh! i do thank you for the opinion and I am happy that you found out things that your partner did when you were still not married. I do respect your point! happy mylotting!
• Malaysia
7 Jun 12
Hi, Katrina. Marriage is not a year or two. If living together before marrying someone can ruin the excitement of living together after married, then, what about the next 5, 10, 20 years etc. What I am trying to say is it actually depends on the couple on how they feel about their relationship or what their plans are. Even if a couple living separately before getting married, the relationship won't work if there is no spark and other essential elements in nurturing their relationship. So, basically, it all comes back to each individual especially when it involves cultures and traditions. If one is comfortable with living with each other before tying the knot, it is also an advantage to learn more about one's partner. My hubby moved in when we were engaged not because we wanted to test if we've made the right decision on moving to the next level, but I remember it's the feeling that we just wanted to be together and now that we've been married for than 5 years, sometimes, I still feel that we've just gotten married yesterday. It's a cliche, but time does fly so fast!
• Philippines
6 Jul 12
hi there corry! thank you for your view and I am happy that you have been married ffor a long time and that you still think that it was yesterday. that is so sweet. I do believe that we have our own choices which also involves our cultures and traditions. happy mylotting!
@allamgirl (2143)
• Philippines
6 Jun 12
Yeah, it does take the excitement out. I guess we have the same sentiment about it. It's just that when you do get married, it would seem like, nothing really changed since you guys are already living together.
• Philippines
10 Jun 12
hi there allamgirl! thank you for putting exact words on what I wanted to say. I am happy that we are on the same page but I also respect the opinion of others who are not having same views as ours. thank you and happy mylotting!
@GemmaR (8517)
5 Jun 12
I think that it is important to know whether you're going to get on with the person who you're going to be living with. Living with somebody full time is very different to being with someone and seeing them every so often, and if you only find out whether you like living with them or not when you're already married, then this could be a very bad thing to realise indeed. I lived with someone who I thought I really loved, and then I realised that I would actually never be able to live with because he had some very annoying habits; so I am glad that I discovered that before I married him!
• Philippines
6 Jul 12
hi there gemmar! i am glad that you discovered things that you dont like before you have married him. I think that we have our own decisions and we must live our lives the way we want it to be. I do respect your opinion and thank you for sharing it with me
@sk66rc (4250)
• United States
5 Jun 12
I'm currently living with my girlfriend & we've been living together for a while now... Sometimes we feel like a married couple, lol... We didn't really get together with an intention of "test driving"... We just felt that was the natural thing to do at the time...
• Philippines
10 Jun 12
hi there sk66rc! good for you that you find it the natural thing to do. but maybe in the near future you may want to formalize things and put it in black and white, just maybe. I am happy for both off you and respect your opinion.
5 Jun 12
I think different people have different view for this discussion,for me,i don't agree with living in before marriage,because i am a traditional person,maybe living in before marriage is a way to know each other better,but i still don't agree this way.
• Philippines
10 Jun 12
hi there yimsiupang! yes, I can also say that I am a traditional person and so I dont kind of like living in before marriage. But then I do think that we have different views and so I am not forcing anyone my opinion. thank you and happy mylotting!
@Paper_Doll (2373)
• Philippines
5 Jun 12
I still believe in sanctity of marriage. I am not an appliance or something that should be test before buying. I am human so I want to be treated as one.
• Philippines
10 Jun 12
hello there paper doll! thank you for making a nice and direct point on that one. I can see that we are on the same page