getting married

Philippines
July 4, 2012 12:35am CST
hi mylot readers and friends, i had a friend who is 19 year old and still studying, she is pregrant right now with her boyfriend, she's asking wise advise, if getting married is the solution to avoid shame from her family in friends because of her situation right now. i told her, in my opinion getting married is not the solution becuase your pregnant,because married life is for lasting relationship, a commitment to value,you should be matured enough to enter that kind of life, having a son or daughter out of wedlock is the consequences of what you have done, so you should accept wholeheartedly and willingly. what advise can you add?Thanks
6 responses
@p3ks626 (6538)
• Philippines
4 Jul 12
You have a point. And yes its a life long commitment to get married. They can still have the baby even if they are not going to get married. As long as they would do their responsibilities as parents.
• Philippines
4 Jul 12
yes,your correct as long her boyfriend support their baby financially,morally,spiritually even they are not married is a good thing to happen,maybe in the right time if they are meant to each other no matter happen they'll get married,because i believe that we are destined or we have the right person set for us.
@factorial (977)
• Philippines
6 Jul 12
Grace, you have said it perfectly! She should accept the consequences she has done. I hope she will have a normal delivery... Please tell her to take care of her child.
@shylade (3132)
• Philippines
4 Jul 12
I agree with you, marriage is not a solution to their problem. For me, marriage is a lifetime commitment and is really sacred. They are still young and should continue their single life until such time they feel they are ready for this lifetime commitment. For the mean time, they should talk their parents of the boyfriend and then talk to your friend's parents. Since, it is already there and every baby is a blessing then they must live with it and stand by it. Anyway, they should have to be ready for all the consequences of their act.
4 Jul 12
I don't understand why woman get pregnant at young age and then ask someone if it is right to get married or not. They did a thing that was only meant for a husband and wife. So what do they expect, nothing would happen and ignore the consequences? They should get married and be responsible for what they did. Things will change a lot now since it's not the only two of them who are involve but also their baby. Who will suffer the result of what they did, their own parents? My point is, they created the problem so they must be brave to face the difficulties they may encounter in their marriage life.
• India
4 Jul 12
yes obviously,this time her family and friends making her guilty that time their husband family will abuse her,i think she should accept her fault in front of her family i know this is very tough but trust me only that is the right solution,or she should obey their family decisions.thanks take care of your friend.
• Canada
4 Jul 12
Marriage is not the soltion. You have to know each other, and love each other unconditionally. I got married at 19, and I ended up divorced by 22. It left a nasty taste in my mouth and I was not pregnant. Now I am 26 and have 2 children and I am not married. I would never marry my boyfriend until I was 100% sure it was meant to be. Who cares what people think! Also entering into marriage with children can make things more complicated "if it was not meant to be". Children are smart and they can sence when their parents are not happy. I grew up with parents always fighting and acting like children. It wasn't easy on me... I still remember all the fights today! :S