Would you retaliate if you were in my shoes....?

@mobhomeir (7558)
Philippines
July 18, 2012 6:59pm CST
I felt like hitting my rude FIL (Father In Law) the other day when he humiliated us again in front of our neighbor. While me and my wife doing some cleaning outside of my PIL's (parent in law)house. This DEVIL FIL of mine demanded us again to starts pack up our things for moving us out any day from now in the presence of our neighbor. This crazy, devil, old man is really a pain in my neck. I felt like hitting his devil face at that time....thanks I did control my temper... Yes..anyhow we really move out from this Hell like place where this Old Devil lives... What would you do if you're in my shoes? What forms of retaliations would you like to do to this Devil Old Man? Is it right for me to retaliate? Please I need your suggestions.. Mobhomeir here 071912 0759hrs
4 people like this
12 responses
sid556
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
19 Jul 12
Hi Mobhomeir, You did great in holding your temper. I agree that being so rude to you in front of your neighbor was very disrespectful but as someone else said, he showed more about his own character than yours in doing so. Good on you for being the bigger man. Whenever he starts to get on your nerves, just remember that you are making yourself look better than him and also that you are doing this for your wife. Another thing, remind yourself that as horrible as it seems to be living there, he did allow the two of you to stay there in his home. Hope you get your new place in a few days. It sounds really tense in that place.
1 person likes this
sid556
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
19 Jul 12
That's cool. I do hope you get the money or are able to work something out with the landlord. I have had to move back with my mother once in-between apartments and it's really hard, I know. I got along so much better with my mom when I wasn't living with her. I think you will find it the same with your father in law. I hope so. Family is so important.
mobhomeir
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
thanks for the concern my friend. yeah, we'll be leaving in the next day or two though our money is not yet sufficient for the required payment before moving in. I hope I can produce that amount...thanks my friend for responding.. Mobhomeir here 071912 1023hrs
cerebellum
@cerebellum (3863)
• United States
19 Jul 12
It is really rude of him to talk to you like that. In private it is bad enough, but to do it in public! No wonder you felt like hitting him. I don't think that physical retaliation is good however. For one thing, he is your wife's father, and you are still under his roof. The best thing would probably be to move out as quick as you can, and then you don't have to have anything more to do with him. If you wife still wants to see him because he is her father, you don't have to go with her.
1 person likes this
mobhomeir
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
That's right my friend. Anyway, we already have a new house, hopefully, two or three days from now we're already at our new fad, though our money is still not yet sufficient enough for our advance rental...thanks my friend for responding.. Mobhomeir here 071912 0907hrs
1 person likes this
cerebellum
@cerebellum (3863)
• United States
19 Jul 12
I'm glad you are moving soon even if it will be hard with the money. Now you won't have to put up with being treated like that! Good Luck!
winterose
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
19 Jul 12
not it is not right to retailiate he took you in you are not sleeping on the road, that means there is some good in him. It just time that you leave and he won't stop telling you to leave until you do.
1 person likes this
mobhomeir
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
Yeah we're almost there my friend..three days from now we will be gone here in our Devil's place...thanks for responding again Mobhomeir here 071912 2225hrs
Jane
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
dear Martin, Honestly I do not know. I know I was raised by my grandfather to respect the old and the young as long as they are respectable. But in your case it's hard to judge and I can't say anything. Sometimes when too much humiliation or rudeness is showed to us- we can do something that is not good or hurt people as well. I know you are patient enough to hold your temper and I hope you will remain that way. Pray for him that's the best way to retaliate.
1 person likes this
mobhomeir
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
I understand what you mean. That's true at the time of the situation you can never say you can hold it because you never know how the intense of the issue. At that time I never even answer the old man. I pitied my wife, she cried while wiping the floor. I am calm now and ready to be at peace with my devil FIL..thanks for responding my bonita.. Mobhomeir here 071912 2221hrs
asdomencil
@asdomencil (4265)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
That was really rude, however, I will still consider that he is my FIL and respect for it. I might answer him and show that I was really mad of what he does, but stll I will do it with respect.
1 person likes this
mobhomeir
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
I guess it is easier said than done my friend because you never experience it yet. No matter how good will be your reasons it is useless because this devil old man is SUPER DOPER DEAF...thanks for responding anyway... Mobhomeir here 071912 0900hrs
asdomencil
@asdomencil (4265)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
I got your point. I never been in this situation that's why I can eaily tell you and recommends what you said.
Raine38
@Raine38 (12257)
• United States
19 Jul 12
He is still your father in law and way older than you are. It wouldn't be a good idea if you hit him. You may answer back but do not use coarse language nor shout, do not go down his level. You're way better than that. I know it's embarrassing to be humiliated in front of other people, but actually he is humiliating himself even more. Other people now know what is he really like, he's rude and temperamental. I think by just telling him what's on your mind is enough. At least he knows you will not take crappy treatments from him or anyone else.
1 person likes this
mobhomeir
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
Yes..it was good I was able to control my self. My concern today is where i would get the money..life is really so hard at the midst of scarcity lots and lots of problem may rise taller than your self... thanks again my friend.. Mobhomeir here 071912 1207hrs
Morning Girl
@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
Well it's good you controlled yourself. He is old and the father of your wife so no matter what you still have to avoid retaliating. Now I believe you have to really move out of that man. If he really is evil then why not go and pack your things? Why do you have to live with him? Do what he wants. Go and live a more peaceable life away from the devil.
1 person likes this
mobhomeir
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
Yes...we're about to leave this devil place three days from now hopefully. This old man can't just wait for us when to move out....thanks for responding.. Mobhomeir here 071912 0920hrs
suzzy3
@suzzy3 (8342)
•
19 Jul 12
You were helping your father in law out.Perhaps you should quietly remind him of that fact.Not knowing all the details suggesting the neighbour probably knows what your fil is like.It is a good job you did not hurt the old man.Look for somewhere else to live fast.I feel sorry for your mil bless her.hope things work out for you
kingparker
@kingparker (9673)
• United States
19 Jul 12
So, are you still living under his roof. If you can find a job, or save enough money, why not move out right away. I won't suggest any physical retaliation, why not go through verbal. I would suggest you tell him that "I am officially moving out, out of your sight, have a good f*ck*ng life of your own." Why not say something out of your mind at the moment, and move on.
1 person likes this
mobhomeir
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
It would be useless if you would talk to him regarding on what he did, he's a f**ck*g DEAF. We have already a new place to say though our money is not sufficient yet..two days from now hopefully we can move out...if that happen I will bless that day... thanks for the concern my friend.. Mobhomeir here 071912 0855hrs
shylade
@shylade (3132)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
I am glad you hold your temper. Anyhow, it's not you or your wife was humiliated but he, himself. Because he just show how merciless and uneducated he was. Retaliation in any form is not good. It is much better if you move out the house to avoid further tension. Don't worry for God sees it and He will guide you with your way. Remember that life is an echo. Whatever you give, life will give it back to you. So, let life give it back to your father in law and he gave and deserve.
1 person likes this
mobhomeir
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
Thanks for that advice my friend..yes, we hopefully moving out next days from now depends on the agreement which I am going to suggest to the landlady. Our money is not yet sufficient enough, hope we can produce it before our target date of moving out..thanks for responding my friend..\ Mobhomeir here 071912 1021hrs
ravisivan
@ravisivan (14079)
• India
19 Jul 12
Yes. He has humiliated you in front of his neighbour. Thereby he has helped you develop confidence to move out of the house and stay separately. your getting anger is fine but that should not make you hit your elders. have a good day.
1 person likes this
mobhomeir
@mobhomeir (7558)
• Philippines
19 Jul 12
Yes my friend. This crazy old man is really my problem but we have already a new place to stay and hopefully we'll be moving out two or three days from now...thanks for responding my friend... Mobhomeir here 071912 0853hrs
camyferns
@camyferns (32)
• India
19 Jul 12
okay Mister i think i have been in your shoes. I think whatever you did was apt and you kept your dignity by not responding to the DEVIL FIL and giving him the respect of being a senior citizen(although one wud feel he doesn't deserve).