When to tell someone you love them

United States
July 29, 2012 12:29am CST
So I have been seeing this guy for a while, we haven't made if official yet because there's kind of an age gap and he wants to wait till I get older.(I'm legal though) But at my age and his, we're just a two very places in life with our age. With all this being said, we definitely act like a couple and have strong feelings for each other. I just feel like the day he tells me is quickly approaching and I don't know what to do if he says it first, I like him alot but I'm not quite sure if I love him or not. I don't want to just say it back because he said it, but I definitely know I won't say it first.
2 responses
@leighz (456)
30 Jul 12
Older guys are tricky, they know if you've fallen or if you're just pretending not to show it. Either way, there's no reason for you to stress out about it. Mature guys are more likely to anticipate this from a younger woman. But sometimes when it comes to true emotions, its most likely to betray you, it comes out naturally, it shows in your ways, it can be read in your face in big bold letters. So even if you don't say it, he would see it.
5 Aug 12
Totally agree with leighz here. Older guys are more experienced than you are. You should keep that in mind. Now as far as the "reading" mentioned, he will be able to tell pretty much exactly what your feelings are, because, usually you will just let them display, without noticing. And that is NOT a bad thing, IF the guy you are with is respectful towards you. On the other hand, if he is mainly interested in fun and casual activities, he might take advantage of the emotions you are nurturing for him (or for what you only see in him). What I mean in the other sentence is that you should be as natural as possible in any amorous relationship, because if you aren't, you'll probably look at one guy, but you will see somebody totally different. That being said: IF either you OR him are being superficial in your relationship, you WILL get a superficial relationship. Ok, since I am getting too deep into love affairs, I'll cut this post short. My best suggestion for the OP is to use communication for exactly what it is meant for: telling the truth about your precise feelings (ask yourself what exactly do you feel). DO NOT alter the sincerity in your communication, OR you WILL end up with an un-sincere relationship (a.k.a.: just another lie). P.S. The very best way to see the truth is THROUGH the other person's eyes.
@Jshean20 (14349)
• Canada
29 Jul 12
Definately don't say those words back to him until you really mean it. It might be hard not saying it back when he says it because you might be stuck for words, but just be honest. I would just stick with something along the lines of "as you know I really do like you a lot, I dont take the "L" word lightly and I want to be fair to you and tell you when I'm ready. Good luck to you.