Promise is a promise...
By AngelaMarie
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
Philippines
August 20, 2012 2:31am CST
This morning my nephew called to reminded me about my present for his coming birthday and I assured him that I going to give what I had promise and never break it. I made a promise to him one year ago that I will give him a bicycle on his 7th year birthday if he going to become a good boy and study hard. Also we have an agreement that I can only give my present to him if he practice more on reading, writing, less watching tv and eat more on vegestables and fruits. I am glad that he's doing everything to fulfill our agreement and he became more focus on his study than watching tv. By next week,I am going to pick-up his bicycle which I already purchased to my friend two months ago and I know my nephew become very happy on his 7th birthday!
How about you my fellow friends? Do you make an agreement first before giving present/gift to you love onces? Do you always fulfill your promise? Thank you for sharing!
4 people like this
23 responses
@else22 (4317)
• India
21 Aug 12
You have really done the right thing.It would serve as a big boost for your nephew's interest in studies and in addition,it would make him respect you more.Promises once made should be kept,or,I would rather,'must be kept.'So promises must be made very cautiously.My principle is,'Never make a promise.And if you make it,then keep it.'Hollow,unkept promises show you in poor light.
1 person likes this
@joankath29 (60)
• Philippines
21 Aug 12
Well, I do have four niece's/nephew's. They usually asked me for something during their brthdays or during christmas. I usually give them gifts at special occasions like this. And everytime I'll tell them that I'd be giving them a gift, I always tell them to do good with school so that I could give them the gift they want to have. They usually strive to good with things everytime i'll be telling them this and they never ever fail to remind me about the gift that I promise them. Well, I really don't fail to give them gifts on their birthdays or during christmas that's why every year they also wouldn't fail to remind me of the gifts they want to have.
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
20 Aug 12
I just fullfilled one to my little granddaughter. I promised her that if she was good in school I would take her to her favorite restaurant and she could order anything she wanted...well I just took her out to fulfill my promise...we had an awesome time together!
1 person likes this
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
21 Aug 12
Wow, your so sweet to your granddaughter for sure she enjoy eating in the restaurant and it also a good bonding for both of you. Have a nice day! Thank you for sharing this awesome experience with your granddaughter.
1 person likes this
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
• India
21 Aug 12
Hello my friend Bhebelen14 Ji,
Well, I read your discussion to my hubby and to our 9 yrs old grand daughter first, as She is also behaving exactly in similar ways, her all activities would come to stand still, after watcthing Tv. Her hands become frozen after seeing TV. She gets scolding regularly in the morning from my Son/DIL. We just can not blame, this is a digital era. No body takes anything seriously. I too have told my Grand-daughter to give suitable gift, if She does whatevr is told in your letter. her DOB is on 19-Oct-03 and She was born in FT. LDR (Miami-USA). I also know, parebting is most difficult subjects for all parents comparing with our time. Our lone youngest sibling is daughter is of 34 yrs old and has two children.She too feels difficult to bring them up.
May God bless You and have a great time 
@maygodblessu44 (7336)
• India
23 Aug 12
Hello my friend Bhebelen14 Ji,
Well, as I was posting our DIL came back from her office, then I asked her to go through including my response, and convinced her that all parents are undergoing same sea changes among the children globely. So it is a natural process. Nothing can be done.
May God bless You and have a great time
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
22 Aug 12
Thank you maygoblessu44 for reading my discussion with your hubby and granddaughter. Have a good day!
1 person likes this
@purplealabaster (22094)
• United States
20 Aug 12
There are some presents that I have given that my children have had to "earn" first, but the way that they earned the presents was more about making sure that they were ready to have that present. For instance, my daughter had to prove that she was responsible by doing daily tasks without being asked or reminded before she could have her ears pierced, because she would have to remember to take care of her ears, clean them, etc., so they did not get infected, and I wanted to make sure that she could remember and be responsible before I let her get her ears pierced.
@purplealabaster (22094)
• United States
22 Aug 12
I think that letting children earn a large reward, such as a bicycle, for trying their best and improving on things that are important is a good incentive for them, especially if they have a time frame that makes it easier to not only remember but also gives them enough time to show improvement, especially if it might take a while before they really are able to show consistent improvement. I think that the bicycle was a good way to motivate your nephew, and it obviously worked, which is wonderful.
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
21 Aug 12
That's was wonderful, teaching your children on how to handle things regarding their health and presents without being asked or reminded they learn how to become responsible in life. You have a great way in handling this king of situation. Thank you for sharing!
1 person likes this
@bjc66bjc (6730)
• United States
20 Aug 12
Hi Bhebelen, that why I try not to make promises..I believe in
keeping them and fulling filing when you make them..
I don't know the last time I made a promise...it would bother
me to know end if I could not keep a promise..So I don;t put
that additional stess on my self....
1 person likes this
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
21 Aug 12
I got your point my dear friend. Thank you for sharing! Have a nice day!
1 person likes this
@ladygator (3465)
• United States
21 Aug 12
Good morning Bhebelen14
I do my very best to always keep any promise that I make. If I dont think that I will be able to fullfill this I wont promise until I do. I also try my best to not let others promise my children something that they will not hold up to. Because then they become sad and dont understand why they didnt get what they were promised. It makes me mad when they are saddened by someone else. I dont work out agreements with anyone on birthday presents or christmas. Because I am going to get them something no matter what. Not the one thing that they wont know specifically is that the type of gift does factor in on the price of the gift. Like my daughter wants an ipod but I am not planning on getting her an expensive one because she breaks things (still at 13!!) but I still plan on buying it for her.
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
22 Aug 12
Hi ladygator, like you I do not make a promise that I can not able to fulfill because i know it will hurt their feelings especially if he/she is kid. Thank you for sahring and have a good night!
@natliegleb (5175)
• India
20 Aug 12
i always prefer to keep up promises and fulfill it by living to it and also present it on time and i feel a close connection to it.if i dont complete it,the other person might really feel hurt and bad about us
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
21 Aug 12
I agree, we better to keep our promises and fulfill it as much as possible to prevent anybody feelings to get hurt, or better not to promise if we can make it. Thank you for sharing! Have a wonderful day!
@mikyung (2232)
• Philippines
20 Aug 12
You are such a nice and thoughtful auntie 
I believe promises should be fulfilled. Kids have this memory that will keep this for a long time. I'm, for one, have nephews and neices that I seldom see now, but I'm trying to give them present when I have the chance to visit them one of this days. Good job in that. Thanks
I believe promises should be fulfilled. Kids have this memory that will keep this for a long time. I'm, for one, have nephews and neices that I seldom see now, but I'm trying to give them present when I have the chance to visit them one of this days. Good job in that. Thanks@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
21 Aug 12
I agree, most of the kids has a very sharp memory and remember almost all the things including promises. i am happy that even though your far away from your nieces and nephews you can able give them a present if your given a chance. Thank you for sharing and have a nice day!
@riyauro (6421)
• India
20 Aug 12
I think you have done great for the kid. Because of you he is concentrating on his studies. That is a wonderful way to encourage kids. Good job that you kept your promise and he kept his promise. I have very far from my niece and nephews and when I have to give them anything I will make sure to execute your idea. thanks for sharing and have a wonderful day ahead.
@Raine38 (12257)
• United States
20 Aug 12
Like you, I also like entering into agreements whenever I give gifts to my kid siblings. It is mainly because I don't want them to be used to asking and getting whatever they want for nothing. It is also one way for them to "work" on something that they want; because I believe that if they worked hard to get something, they are more likely to take good care of it.
For my "older" family and friends, I just give them gifts whenever I'm able without any agreement whatsoever.
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
21 Aug 12
I also do not make agreement with my adult friends and relative I just give them gift during special occasion and not asking anything in return. But for my niece and nephew needs and agreement because I want them to become a better person someday. Thank you for sharing!
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
21 Aug 12
I agree. We need to make sure to fulfill our promise and do not break it as much as possible. Thank you for sharing!
@mikej143 (309)
• Philippines
20 Aug 12
Making promise to children were to crucial for me a promise made to do and done cause we were not breaking the heart of that person or might be the trust to make a word or assurance that person might not trust us anymore or having less trust in us.
And be aware that children will note what we will say and promised to them and it might broke that we also broke the trust but its on depends by situation were the child can understand with the standing. But if really you can give go for it. If we say yes let the yes be yes and no be no and promise be yes we were not hurting a person but also we commit sin in front our GOD with that giving false assurance.
@snookms (53)
• United States
20 Aug 12
On occasion yes I gave promised my children things they have really wanted in exchange for doing something that really benefits them. Alot of times they will want something that they have to save for so I tell them well if you do what I tell you to do, keep up with your schoolwork, no backtalk then I will be able to give you some other little jobs around the house to earn extra money. It seems to me like they are happier with something that they have had to work to get than if I had just bought it for them straight out. Also if it is something they have saved to buy or that they have worked to earn they tend to take better care of it in the long run.
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
21 Aug 12
That's was a very good idea and good practice for you children because for sure they will learn how to value their things and save money from their earning by doing household chores. Thanks. Have a nice day!
@sweetloveforeve (13107)
• Portugal
20 Aug 12
i never made promises about presents^^ i think its cute that you made one and will give the present to your nephew^^ for sure he will feel very happy. but i agree when you say that a promise is a promise. everytime i promise something i always try to make it true. i dont like when someone says i will do this and then dont. in my opinion the promises that usually turn into lies are love promises. usually in love people promise a lot and then nothing goes as they wanted. anyway im very happy for your nephew^^ happy birthday to him^^
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
21 Aug 12
I agree, when we promise we need to make it come true no matter what. And for sure my nephew will be very happy when he receive his present. Thank you for greeting him in advance. Have a great day!
@toniganzon (72285)
• Philippines
20 Aug 12
Always with my son and we always lose. He would ace all subjects without trouble and every card day, he's too excited to receive his, knowing that he'll get his prize. Just glad he never disappointed us, not even once.
His grandfather is scared now to make any deals with him since he knew my son would always win anyway.
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
21 Aug 12
Wow, your son is very intelligent and really makes you happy by doing his beat to have a very good grades. Thanks. Have a nice day!
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
20 Aug 12
That's how we are with our kids.
We give gifts in exchange of a promise of doing good. It's a nice motivation for them. And when they do good , they will continue to be, because they are used to it.
So, when we promised a gift to a kid,we should never break it, or it will break their heart. 
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
20 Aug 12
I agree with you! Never break a promise to a kid because it will break their heart and never forget it. Thank you for sharing!
@louievill (28851)
• Philippines
20 Aug 12
I always give my children an expensive gift and incentive that we will all eat out if they place in any of the top 3 spots of their class at the end of every school year. Oh you reminded me, I promised them ( not connected with their grades anymore)that they would get turns ( 1 each) in eating out with me in Gilligan's SM Southmall or Alabang Town Center that I have not yet fulfilled cause typhoon season suddenly came and sort of forgot, I promise to keep my word
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
21 Aug 12
Hi louievill, your so sweet for giving your children expensive gift and incentive. Also i know that you children understand why you did not yet fulfilled your promise to them because of the typhoon. Thank you for sharing! Have a good day!
@uolyram (266)
• Philippines
20 Aug 12
Yes, a promise is a promise that is to be fulfilled on the day it has to be given because the one expecting would be very happy to have it. It is your way of pushing up your nephew to do his best and in return you give a present to him. That has to be fulfilled for you also who is giving will also felt the fulfillment of it.
@Bhebelen14 (5194)
• Philippines
20 Aug 12
You're right there, we need to put limits in rewarding strategy. Thank you for sharing!
