Chaotic Love/Family Life

There is nothing you can do, also it's not of your business. So the only thing you can do is be a friend and listen. Nobody is asking for your advice, the thing most needed is a listener. Time will tell what will happen. BTW there is a big difference between falling in love or love someone. Falling in love can pass by as well. More interesting to me would be how come suddenly the husband falls in love with someone else. What did change their relationship? The childeren, husband getting less attention? Or did they never really love eachother and was their marriage planned by.... I don't know if the husband is a loser, fact is love can pass by and you if so you can also admit it and go on with your life. I doubt if your friend, in long term, will be happy to have a husband who doesn't love, like or even can't stand her.

That is just down right mean!!! Your friend can discuss this with HR. Any HR department does not allow this behavior. You should be more angry at the husband. Even if the querida is acting all "I won b*tch", the husband is allowing her. She wouldn't feel like that if the husband does not make the querida feel this way. As for the husband, telling the wife of his affair, that is down right rude!!!! I'd burn him if it were me. Him and his bimbo! If she doesn't want to leave her husband, then fight. Fight like a monster and get the husband back. She shouldn't be all goody-goody and act like a martyr. She should raise hell about it, let her husband know it's effin' not okay!

Owh! This is very sad story I ever read on net while posting in forum. I think your friend must me crying every moment in her heart. I suggest you to spend more time with her after working hour. Bring her to club, party or so on to get know other people. Maybe this way she may find some other guy who can make friend with her and make her forget her husband and ask for divorce. She must release the chain that tight her heart. If she says she loves her husband, she doesn't really mean it. It's only a matter she hasn't met a right person. Or maybe she was worried about their child if they divorce or some other reason. Try to find it. About the husband, he should feel shy to be such a man. He should be a woman.

It takes two to make a relationship work. If he did not cheat on her with the "homewrecker" then it would of been someone else. I would not get in on the blame game. As for your friend, there is little that you can do until she makes up her mind to be done with being treated so disrespectfully. I am sure that a part of her is hoping that he will wake up and come back to her and ya know, that could happen. Some people do actually manage to save their marriages through these kinds of things. I don't know how because I think it would be almost impossible to trust him again. All you can really do is be a shoulder for your friend at this point. The choice to stay or leave is hers. I would have left his butt and I would be looking for another job.

Your friend has been slapped with the painful reality that her husband doesn't love her and yet she still hopes of having him back? I have my own personal problems, too and even if others would say that I should just go on with my life without my husband, still I held on. BUT, we have a different problem. It is something that I am still hoping that would change. I think your friend needs to move on with her life. I do not think that she still loves her husband despite of his husband having an affair. She might be feeling scared of being left alone. Help your friend realize that no one else can help her except herself. It's time to move on.

The best thing you can do is be her friend. She needs a real friend right now. And she will need one even more in the future. She may be in denial. I know a woman who, when her husband told her he was in love with another woman and he divorced her, lost her mind. She became irrational, refused to let him see their kids on the court appointed days and really was not functioning well. The result was she went in the hospital for her emotional instability and he got custody of the kids. Your friend is in the most difficult position a woman can find herself in. She may be hoping he will come back to his senses and dump his gf. It's happened before. A lot. She needs your sympathy and understanding. Your feelings are understandable. I would want to choke the gf. But imagine how it is for your friend everyday at work. She is trying desperately no doubt to cope. How hard it must be for her. I feel so sorry for a woman in her position. But she knows she has to think of her children and take care of them so she is not apt to give up or give in - yet. Be there for her. She needs a friend to sympathize without condemning her for putting up with this. Be understanding. I wish her good luck in whatever happens. This is a very sad situation.

laydee yes this is really tragic for your friend as the three of them all work in the same company.You are right the other girl is really vile, a home wrecker and there at the workplace to rub it in to your friend.If it were me he would have killed any love 'I had for him when he chose t o cheat with the other girl.I would have filed for divorce at once. some women just keep hoping the cheater will come back to them but it never works that way at all.I would tell her not to waste any more love on 'that loser of a husband and file for divorce.as later she might find a man who love her and keep his marriage vows with her.

Somehow i believe she is hoping the love her husband used to have for her will be back. But the thing is... it won't if she is that way. She should stand up, kick him out of her life and move on and be beautiful and smart and everything more than that querida! I really hope that she will come to her senses. But i do feel for her, as a wife, this is one of those things that scares me..my husband falling out of love and finding comfort in other women..

It also came to my mind that most women tend to be really martyr and being afraid to be left by their husband no matter if how he lacks manliness. And yeah this is freaking much very insulting to think that they are married then working together in same company? I can totally picture how indecent it is. First you must ask your friend if she wants justice on her part? Then how can she solve the problem if she will not fight for her right? She must be really willing to let go her husband but then while letting him go I think she must also file a case of adultery. For now you must talk to her if she is willing to hire a lawyer because this is already a serious case. The two of them of course including that home wrecker are doing the crime. If I am on your friend's shoes then I would be really asking for LEGAL ADVISE already. If you are here in Manila just consult with IBP that is located in Julia Vargas Ave. Ortigas Pasig City. There is no need to file a case yet but just ask legal advise on what to do for a husband who is having another woman. Shocksss!!! honestly this is much degrading. Tell your friend that she must have respect to herself. If you can be angry then do it for her to wake up in reality. Then you said they even have kids. Then tell your friend to ask her husband if her husband is willing to have chaotic family that can lead to broken home.

I would advise your friend to leave her husband. If possible, find a new job away to the husband. That would end all heartaches eventually. As long as he will make an arrangement to support his children. Separation is inevitable and will eventually result to lasting peace every party - peace of mind and peace among them. Easier said than done, a problem like that, I think, needs a not so drastic move, if it cannot be resolve through diplomacy,even how painful it is. She must move on without the husband. Thanks

You're friend doesn't deserve this but it's the reality. If she continues to fight back the odds,it's because she has a right to. They were married, they have a family together. She wants to keep their family together even at her expense. I pray that she will have the courage and strength to get through this ordeal. I hope that she will take the high road and just focus on her kids.