You have to say something nice
By dorannmwin
@dorannmwin (36392)
United States
September 13, 2012 12:00am CST
Imagine that you were back in school and you came home with a homework assignment that simply had each person in your class' name written on it and your assignment was to come up with a compliment for that person. It doesn't matter whether you like the person or not or even if you really know the person, you have to do it.
This was my daughter's homework assignment today and though she is a very accepting, loving person it was something that she really struggled with. The reason that she struggled with it is because of the fact that she feels that most of the people in her class at school are mean (think like the movie Mean Girls). It took her almost two hours to get this done because there were some people that she really couldn't say anything nice about.
It made me think, can I say something nice about everyone that I know or have known and I actually can even say yes about the person that I dislike the most in the world (this was a girl that stole from my husband and myself and used us as well). I can say that I am actually thankful to her because if I hadn't known her then I would have never had the opportunity to meet my friends Rachael and Shane because it was through another friend of hers that I met them.
What about you, can you say something nice about one of the people that you dislike the most in the world? What do you think about a teacher sending her students home with an assignment like this?
1 person likes this
9 responses
@bingskee (5234)
• Philippines
13 Sep 12
i think i would struggle like your daughter. if there is a time limit, i think i will be able to finish it. 
mean people gives out negative energies that sometimes overtake other people and transform them into negative people, too.
i just couldnt understand why a teacher would give an assignment like this. what could be the objective? it's like torture to students. well, maybe these teachers think that this activity could help students the effect of mean or bad people to others. still, it is not really a good method to teach values. it could aggravate a certain student's dislike to another. 
mean people gives out negative energies that sometimes overtake other people and transform them into negative people, too.
i just couldnt understand why a teacher would give an assignment like this. what could be the objective? it's like torture to students. well, maybe these teachers think that this activity could help students the effect of mean or bad people to others. still, it is not really a good method to teach values. it could aggravate a certain student's dislike to another. @dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
14 Sep 12
I talked to the teacher about the assignment today and basically she told me that the reason for it is because of the fact that there are several different children in the class that show no humility and are too full of pride. By making an assignment like this, she is trying to bring those students off of their high horses while also bolstering the self-esteem of the other students.
@bounce58 (17380)
• Canada
17 Sep 12
I don't think I like this homework for a young kid.
As we get older, we get to be more understanding about people. And maybe even be forgiving. So when we are faced with a challenge like this, I'm sure we could rationalize it in such a way that we could say something nice.
I'm not sure for younger kids.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
17 Sep 12
I agree with you. On the one hand I think that this is a great assignment. However, I also think that it really wasn't the right assignment for a bunch of nine and ten year old children.
@savypat (20216)
• United States
13 Sep 12
I think this is a wonderful idea. I wish I had been smart enough to think of this and give it to not only my students but also my children for each new group of people they came in contact with. Instead we all fall into the habit of picking each other apart. Thank you for this discussion.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
14 Sep 12
At first I have to admit that I really didn't like the assignment at all. But considering the fact that it made me, as a mother, think about things, by the time that she was done with it, I really did feel like it was a great idea. Additionally, as Kathryn worked through the list of her classmates, she started to get more enthusiastic about it as well.
@much2say (57760)
• Los Angeles, California
13 Sep 12
Interesting assignment! You have to say something nice about everyone - you have no choice - no mean words allowed!! I guess it's an exercise which shows us there are positive sides to everyone - EVERYONE.
Sure, I think I can say nice things about anyone - no matter how terrible a person they are. I can say "He has a nice smile" or "She has nice hair" . . . it's a shallow answer, but it IS a compliment. Would it be acceptable to say "She's good at keeping her claws sharpened"? 
Ok, joking aside. Funny thing is I can't figure out who I dislike the most! I will pick one and say a fellow skater that no one liked - she never bothered to say hi to anyone, she was ultra competitive, ultra me me me, and ultra bossy to her own husband. The one nice thing I could say about her is: She has all the confidence in the world to be herself. (Well, of course, that statement is open for interpretation !)
Ok, joking aside. Funny thing is I can't figure out who I dislike the most! I will pick one and say a fellow skater that no one liked - she never bothered to say hi to anyone, she was ultra competitive, ultra me me me, and ultra bossy to her own husband. The one nice thing I could say about her is: She has all the confidence in the world to be herself. (Well, of course, that statement is open for interpretation !)@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
14 Sep 12
For some people I admit that I would come up with something that was superficial as well. However, in my own reflection that I was doing while I was working with Kathryn on this assignment, I will admit that most of the thoughts I had on people that I know were really not superficial at all. The reason that I believe that this was the case for me is because of the fact that I really take the time to get to know someone.
@Inderjeetkaur (944)
• India
13 Sep 12
None of us is perfect, but we all possess some good qualities. This kind of assignment will let the kids see or search for good qualities in their classmates. We often see and focus and talk about the one odd quality in the other person, but overlook five good qualities in them.
As you said you are thankful to a girl due to whom you met some good friends in life. Likewise your daughter and her classmates will also learn to see goodness in others. There is always some positivity in every situation and every person.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
14 Sep 12
That is exactly right. Though it might be difficult to see the good things about other people at times, there is always something about them that is a good thing about them. It could be a talent or it could simply be that they have a very attractive feature.
@ShyBear88 (59342)
• Sterling, Virginia
14 Sep 12
I can think of a few people. Two of them are my sister-in-laws. I don't like that but I can say without them I would know my two nephews and my children would never have such cute, and loveable cousins.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
14 Sep 12
You see, that is basically the kind of conclusion that I came to about my own life by working through the assignment with Kathryn. I can't think of a single person that I've ever encountered that I can't come up with nothing nice to say about them.
@bunnybon7 (50970)
• Holiday, Florida
13 Sep 12
wow. that teacher has been reading old emails cause ive gotten an email about a teacher doing that and its to make everyone in the class feel special. its a good idea in a way. but she should give anyone able to do it a really good grade! also she should have to do it herself. 
and include herself.
cause ive gotten an email about a teacher doing that and its to make everyone in the class feel special. its a good idea in a way. but she should give anyone able to do it a really good grade! also she should have to do it herself. and include herself. @dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
14 Sep 12
Hmm, I wonder if this teacher might be one of the people that you send emails to or something. I have to admit that I was very upset about this assignment at first, but I ended up enjoying it because it actually made me think about whether or not I could say something nice about those people that I don't really like. It was a challenge, but yes, I was able to find something about them which I admired or for which I am thankful.
@cynthiann (18612)
• Jamaica
13 Sep 12
The assignment is excellent and I congratulate the teacher. It helps the children to look at their classmates in a different way - objectively. This is a good learning exercise. It is hard though, but it must have made your daughter think hard too. I can say something nice about most people in fact all people - well -except one and I am working on that one
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
14 Sep 12
Just like you, I really can't think of anyone that I've ever encountered in my life that I cannot say something nice about.
It really was a great assignment once I took the opportunity to really think about the assignment.
@riyauro (6421)
• India
13 Sep 12
Oh boy that would be tough on me. I can't be saying things for the ones who have hurt me and If I look in the deeper without thinking about my hurt, I think there is something or other that is good about the person. Mostly we tend to look only in one direction and that is the bad part of the person.
I think the teacher who gave this assignment was very smart, and she wanted the students to realize each others good points. Thinking of it and then saying good things about your classmates is wonderful. Thanks for sharing and have a wonderful day ahead. 
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
14 Sep 12
At first I have to admit that I really was upset about this assignment, but after helping Kathryn to get through the assignment, I really do think that it is a good thing because it does show you that even though you don't necessarily get along with everyone, there is good in every person that you encounter in your life.
