after 7 years of being a stay at home mom, wife decides to work ...

Philippines
September 30, 2012 6:56pm CST
and i know she is excited, and i am so happy for her. but the problem is our son is already used on being with her twenty four seven. of course he needs adjustment as well but i am just worried that he will be stress with this. me and wife talked about it already and she said that it will be a great help with the finances. that is true, plus when she starts working she will be having benefits that a stay at home mom can not have. well like health insurances and a lot more things like that. i am happy that she will be a career woman again, but i am also affected on what will be the outcome with my son. or i guess i am just over thinking.
2 people like this
15 responses
@kemak28 (724)
• United States
1 Oct 12
Is your son in school? If so I would hope it wouldnt effect him so much since he wouldn't be at home during the day anyways. I am waiting ro go back to work once my girl is in school. I have a few years to wait for that.
• Philippines
1 Oct 12
yes he is at school and he is turning seven this january. most of the offered jobs here now are for night jobs. and since i am a musician as well i work at night too. that is why i am worried. well i guess we can all adjust, there is always the first day and that is always been the difficult one. i just hope my sons wont get stressed with all of this. thanks a lot for the response
@kemak28 (724)
• United States
1 Oct 12
Ok I understand your concern. I guess all you can do is talk to him amd prepare him for the change and hopefully he will take to it well. Hope it all goes well for your family
@jricky1 (6800)
• China
1 Oct 12
It's not easy to just raise a child.So moms are great people in this world.Starting to work gives us lots of hope so hope she enjoys this new start in life.Make some money can let the family easier living.And i regard this as a great opportunity to take.
• Philippines
1 Oct 12
If your getting more than enough income then if im the wife i will rather stay at home and take care of my kids and husband so i can also look after my kids behavior so they will grow up as a good and better person with full of love though now a days what also important is financial, specially if the kids is already grown up and in school to give them good education, though in my case i will rather work as long besides i have no choice since im a single parent to better give my daughter good future though i never failed to give her all my love and time.
• Philippines
7 Oct 12
we only have one child but my income is not that big with now a bigger need of money. since our son is at school already, plus we pay rent and bills as well sometimes we find ourselves lending money so we can pay some of our bills. so if we borrow money when i get my salary it will not be enough for we need to pay the borrowed money. it is already a cycle of borrowing and paying. so my wife decided to help. i would rather want her to stay at home but we also need to think if we can or we need to help each other. thanks a lot for the response and i salute all single parents like you.
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
1 Oct 12
I don't know why one would want to do it, life at home should be more peaceful for one to do things on their own time. I think she likes the challenge. And what a challenge that is! To go back and confront the change that happened in such long years. Everything is moving so fast that 7 years out of the bussiness can be quite a shock.
• Philippines
7 Oct 12
then whats so funny about that? if for example you are in a situation like this. would you still want to stay at home and not help your partner with the finances, just because its been 7 years as staying at home only? actually she got a job already as a CSR of Horizon Blue Cross Blue Shield of New Jersey. and she will start training this monday. i dont think beng stuck at home is a hindrance. if you want it then there is no reason for you to stop achieving it. thanks a lot for the response.
@STOUTjodee (3572)
• United States
1 Oct 12
Since your child is in school, he will do fine with mom working outside the home. I remember when my youngest son was born in October, I started work in January. I was a single mother and had two other children that were in school and then would go to daycare. I think that if they're in daycare they are more likely to be sociable interacting with other children. It will probably be hardest on your wife having to work outside of the home. Now days it takes two people to make a living with the rise of costs for things.
• Philippines
1 Oct 12
now it made me realize that it would be hardest for my wife. all the time i was thinking of our son. i know emotionally it would really be a battle for her but i know that she wants this and i know she can manage. true that now a days it takes two people to make a living. but the obs offer right now are for the evening shifts that is why i am concern that my son might not have a good sleep for his mom is not around there with him. but of course in time i know all of us will be adjusting. thanks a lot for the response.
@Raine38 (12257)
• United States
1 Oct 12
If he's in school, he'll be fine. He will be exposed to some kids who also have btw parents working, probably his teacher is also married with kids and a classic example of a working mom.If it's gonna make you feel better and more at peace, you may speak to his teacher and probably give him a bit of guidance and example on how mommies can work and be mommies at the same time. And that lesser time with them doesn't mean that his mom loves him any less.
• Philippines
1 Oct 12
thats very sweet raine thanks for that. true that there are a lot of moms out there who are working and i can sight that example to my child. for example his favorite teacher. and a lot of parents like his aunt who works but still has time to be at home and cook something special for everyone. its not going to be a bad thing. although i guess like one of the mloters said that this would be harder for my wife. thanks a lot for the response.
@jak2010 (1550)
• Papua New Guinea
12 Oct 12
Good on you, my wife does like that. She leaves school to marry me. When we have a first granny, she goes back to school. 2012 is her year 1 at work. Here is a picture of our grandson
@jak2010 (1550)
• Papua New Guinea
12 Oct 12
My wife came out of school to marry me and when we have our first grand son, she went college and 2012 is her first year of work. Good on you for doing just that.
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
1 Oct 12
That is the reason why a lot of wives hold back in getting their own jobs- the fear of losing time with their children. I know that there is no mother who wouldn't want to be at her kid's side but with the economy, both husband and wife should help in making both ends meet most especially if they have a lot of kids.
@toniganzon (72285)
• Philippines
17 Oct 12
How old is your son? I left my 8 year old son with his dad and i'm now living in another country. Before I left though i talked to him long and hard for several months about my plan to go to another country. I wanted to make sure he is going to be okay. My son is mature for his age and he understood well. I stay in contact with him everyday through facetime and i still tell him things like i used to when i was there. I will be coming home in March for a two-month vacation and I'm looking forward to it.
@asliah (11137)
• Philippines
18 Nov 12
hi, i think your son could practice without seeing his mom every time,and having a work of your wife could be a benefits not only for her but for the whole family,maybe in the first week your child will look for his mother but try also to explain to your son what his mother's do.
@ARIES1973 (11426)
• Legaspi, Philippines
1 Oct 12
It's really hard for a mother to be working having small children which equally needs attention. I am also a mother so I can relate to the situation. I need to get a nanny for my children when they were younger. But now, as they grow older, they can do things by themselves. We won't survive if my husband is the only one who will work. With the high cost of commodities, I don't think one breadwinner in the family can do it. That is the reason why i have to keep on working. But I am not giving up my dream of having my own business so I can spend more time with my family. Have a nice day and good luck to both of you.
• Philippines
1 Oct 12
yes i agree, that with high cost of living now a days a family will not survive when there is only one person who is working for the whole family. we only have one child and my wife even she stays at home have a few things to sell on the net. but now that small business she has is not earning as expected. so she decided to work so that she can have a regular earning. not sometimes there is and sometimes there is not. i guess she will be trying at some call center offices around the metro. although i can say that i am happy for her and i can see her excited. but the thing is i ust hope my child can adjust with it too. thanks a lot for the response.
• Indonesia
2 Oct 12
Hi.. thanks for sharing. I think, your son will get used of it. Furthermore, your son is not a kid anymore, know what is good and bad. Your obligation as parents are to monitor your son wisely. As long as parents have provided children with good moral and religious guidance, they will face the world in a right way :)
@lokisdad (4226)
• United States
3 Jan 16
if you can prepare him slowly before it happens it might not be as bad on him to accept the change especially if he is busy and there already was some change to he norm.
@GemmaR (8517)
1 Oct 12
It is great that your wife has decided to go back to work, because the truth is that once a child gets to school there isn't very much point in staying at home because the child would not be there for six hours out of the day. I know that it will be hard for them both to adjust to the new situation, because of the fact that it is something that they have never experienced before, but they will almost certain adjust and will like it more when they get used to it because of the fact that it will give them both a certain amount of freedom away from each other.