What would u do if he said this??

Hello, My advice is you should I think take a vacation and gone for sometime because you both are very exhausted with each other.You need a space for you to breath and give yourselves a break for it is really not healthy for you to be together. Just pray that all you have gone through will be alright soon.Just have faith with him.

You got me teary there. I am in a similar phase too..but in my case, he had a dui few years back and since then..whenever drunk, he blamed me for it.. After a point, I stopped paying heed to it. Like you, I too feel like stepping out of a loveless relationship but somehow, since there is no hitting and battling, am giving it one chance after the other, hoping that things will sort out. True, most husbands tend to blame the wife when it comes to failure or depression. I am surprised whom they blamed before we came into their lives. Maybe they married in order to blame or nag constantly. I mean, come on, how many people in the world hate their boss? Many of course. Yet, not everyone resorts to depression. Many do try to fight it back or move out or do something to cheer up. You stay strong. If it goes beyond toleration, you should probably take a decision before it is too late..good luck my friend!

What he is doing is emotional and mental abuse. It sounds like my ex-husband; he constantly belittled me if something went wrong in his life, he blamed me for things that happened to him 20 years prior to our even meeting!, and made me feel shamed. I endured this for years because we did have a child together, and I tried to start our relationship once again-we even went to counseling. But he kept reverting back to his old ways, and finally I had had it. We divorced and he's continually made my life difficult, 20 years later. I wouldn't suggest getting into a physical altercation, but proving mental and emotional distress is very difficult. I was told by my lawyer to document specific incidents. I'd suggest talking to someone that can help-a counselor or a lawyer, and get their take. Good luck.

I guess some people just cannot handle failure and take responsibility for whatever he/she has done and tend to put the blame on others. This is probably just despair working in his mind and the blaming is a method for him to cope with life. There are times when I myself would think back on my failures and almost put the blame on someone else for that, but thankfully I didn't because it really was just mostly my fault, and even if it wasn't, blaming would have not made things better. I just hope your husband apologizes for this and did not really mean what he said, because this could really be bad for the both of you. I don't exactly know what you should do but I believe that add prayer and faith to hard work usually helps.

it seems that both of you have gone that far. he may be down at this time. that could explain some of his misdemeanors and other puzzling acts and words. do not dwell much on the acts. try to understand what's going on with him. it is this time that he needs support from people who understand and care for him. just stay with him. it will pay off do good for both of you.

I think that for starters, you need to put him in his place, and let him know how you feel, because people that are in a rut, and mad about something they are going to stay that way if you don't address the issue head on. You need to let him know where you stand, and stop blaming you for the lost of his job. When something tremendous happen in someone life they are venting, but they start to vent in the wrong way, so it's almost like you have to slap them out of this zone that they are in, I mean not literally don't slap him. I'm just saying for some people it gets like that. But don't feel that you did anything wrong, I don't think that this is grounds for divorce you just have to stand up for yourself, and let him know how you feel, because as long as he know he can say anything to you, he will because he know you are not going to say, or do anything. So again I say LOL, tell him how you feel. Because you are just a ticking bomb away, from exploding. You said that you leave stuff alone and pretend that he didn't say anything, that is not good for you, because as you are holding all this stuff in it is causing stress in your body, and it will start to show that's why you have to let out all that steam, before you snap the wrong way. "JUST SAYING!!! Have a great day!

It is quite evident from your post here that you are trying very hard to understand your husband's predicament and his position. However, please don't take it upon yourself when I say that you seem to be "too" passive with the way you handle unpleasant outbursts from your husband. Relationship is about 2 persons coming together to work on it and that means that there is a flow of 2 way traffic. You should not be like a piece of sponge trying to absorb everything, thinking nothing of it and letting the situation (his behavior) get from bad to worse. There is nothing wrong with loosing a job and be unhappy about it but it is wrong in being insensitive of the other party's well being. As for you, I believe you should not tolerating and start communicating what is wrong with his insensitive words which is affecting you. Being passive will just make you appear to be sweeping everything under the rug when you should be really getting rid of the rubbish in your house. Learn to speak up and speak out, as if you are going out with your friends on a shopping trip and you happen to be hungry. Then, instead of letting them know that you are hungry and need a break to appease your hunger, you obligated and carried on with your friends' shopping frenzy. At the end of the day, I think you will agree with me that there will be consequences to bear starting with your hunger pangs affecting your mood and the shopping trip. Not forgetting, the eventual complications of a severe gastric problem on your health. Likewise in this marriage, I hope that you can understand what I am saying and that you should stop bottling up yourself and say what is in your heart for the good of your husband's well being and most of all, for yourself.

Sorry to hear about this, I know this is frustrating. Maybe it's up to you if you still want to live with him and give all the best to make things work to save your relationship. Yes, it is good that he is not hitting you- or else, that would be the last thing you should consider.

Hi..Thank you for posting here on myLot..I understand that you're husband is under a lot of stress right now for losing his job..Typically he has a hard time accepting the fact that he lost his job and felt that he had to blame someone for it. But there's no real excuse for him to have done what he did and be disrectful towards you..I would seriously have a talk with him when he's calm down and tell him what you're feeling..It is not right and also not very healthy for you to go on like this anymore..When a marriage is in trouble, especially when there is no proper communication between the two of you.