My kid won't stay in his own bed!

United States
October 9, 2012 10:36am CST
For the last two weeks or so, my son has been coming to get in bed with my husband and I every single night and it's really starting to get on our nerves. We have never allowed any of the kids to sleep with us. Our bed is OUR bed....he's started this crap recently about being afraid of the dark, which is crap. He is NOT afraid of the dark, that's just his excuse to fight us about going to bed or wanting to sleep with us. He'll go to sleep in his room but usually around 4 or 5 in the morning, he's right there waking one of us up saying he wants to get in bed. If we tell him to go back to bed he cries at the top of his lungs and we tell him to shut up and just come on because the last thing that we want is all 4 kids up at 4 in the morning because one is acting like a brat because he's not getting his way. He flip flops all over the place, he kicks and snores and then we end up being awake until he falls back asleep and one of us has to carry him back in his room. I'm grumpy when I get woke up before I'm ready as it is. If I yell at him and make him go back to bed he's going to keep crying and then all of them will be up and then I'll be REALLY grumpy lol....I'll be the first to admit that my son is a crybaby...he cries all the time, about everything. And he won't stop he just keeps crying. I can't take much more of the waking up at 4 am and listening to his whining. I'm tempted to just bust his butt and take my chances on the other kids waking up because it's the only way he's going to learn to stop getting in our bed!
1 person likes this
9 responses
@lacieice (2060)
• United States
9 Oct 12
Sounds like you are gonna have to sacrifice some sleep to solve this problem. No matter how much noise he makes, and even if he wakes the other kids, you are gonna have to make him go back to his bed. It may take a couple nights, but he will get the idea if you stay firm and don't give in. I know it may be difficult for a little while, but the end results will be worth it. Don't go about it in an angry manner. Stay calm, let him know you love him but he has to stay in his own bed, then put him back in that bed and let him cry. He will soon understand that his crying isn't gonna work.
1 person likes this
@cher913 (25782)
• Canada
9 Oct 12
well, if you feel like doing this, one thing i have heard is that a parent who had the same problem with their child always coming into bed with them did this. Each time the child came to get into bed with them, one of the parents got up, escorted the child back to bed, sat with him for a few minutes and told the child to go back to sleep. they repeated the scenario for several nights until the child got the hint to stay in his own bed. however, i am sure this would be pretty exhausting for a few days!
• United States
9 Oct 12
I'm afraid that's what we're going to have to do. The first couple of times it happened, we assumed he had a bad dream or just couldn't sleep or something, but now, it's like clockwork...every single night. And we just figured it easier to just put him in bed until he went to sleep and then take him in his room. But I agree with you, you're right. One of us is going to have to get our butts up and physically take him in his room and make him get in his own bed. He may not even cry if we did that...the crying comes when we say "go back to bed"....so I'm preparing myself to be super tired for a couple of days! Lol...thank you for your response! Have a good day. =)
@youless (112123)
• Guangzhou, China
10 Oct 12
You shall encourage your boy with some tricks. I would like to share you my method. When I told my son he should sleep alone, I told him that's because he was a brave boy. As he knew, even if dad still slept with mom. So he was really something because he could sleep alone even if he was so little I think most children shall be proud and glad to accept this idea
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
16 Oct 12
This was something that my daughter went through a stage of doing. We would return her to her own room each and every time that she would try to get in bed with my husband and myself. We kept doing this until she eventually started to sleep through the night again in her own bed. Well, with my son, this was never really a problem. He would come into our room occasionally, but it never became a habit. Now Paul is afraid of storms and will come into our room when it is storming, but he will always just lay down on the floor beside my side of the bed.
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
I used to be like that when I was still a kid. I don't want to sleep in my own room because I'm really scared to be alone. Besides, I'm used to sleep with my parents so that its hard for me to adjust in that way. :)
@crissy92 (91)
• United States
29 Oct 12
My daughter was trying to start that with me, and she's 4. It started when she was sick, and then she thought she would try it all the time. I nipped it in the bud as soon as she tried it when she was better, and explained to her that it was only because she was sick. I would seriously take a weekend when you're not working, and just let him throw his fit. When he sees you're not going to give in, and get his way, no matter what, he'll give up. Prove to him you're stronger. Easier said than done, I know. But it will be worth it in the end. Good luck!
@GemmaR (8517)
9 Oct 12
It is hard to train your child to stay in their own bed but the most important thing that you have to remember is that you should stick to your discipline and make sure that you always put him back in his bed when he gets out of it. Another good idea is to set up some kind of rewards for every night that he spends in his own bed. You should give him a sticker each night he wakes in his own room, and then when he has collected a certain amount he should get some kind of prize, for example a toy that he has wanted for a long time.
• Philippines
9 Oct 12
Oh, that's bad. I hope your son will mature already. My son is still sleeping with us. He's already 8 years old. LOL. There's another room but we feel comfortable if he'll sleep next to us. Anyway, I just stay there on Saturday and Sunday nights. Sleeping with my hubby and my son is my pleasure. Even the bed is just enough for the three of us, we still have sound sleep. I hope your kid will not be a crybaby anymore. Happy mylotting.
@leeandrew (1225)
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
Whoa! good luck to you! I somehow understand what are feeling right there. I also has one kid and she's only 1 year old and three months, but she acts as if she's two or four. She still sleeps with us, in between hubby and I. We don't try to separate her from us yet co's she's still a baby and we also did not bother to buy a crib for her co's we don't have a space for it. My baby would woke us up with her loud cries three times at night for her milk. Sometimes she would just cry for seems no reason. Hubby would get mad and whined but my baby would not care for she doesn't understand things yet, then it's hubby and I that would argue at the end. I once was told by a friend who studied human behavior, and she said that when a baby is acting like that, the parents should understand and deal on what's bothering the child co's for sure there is reasons why their acting like that. She said know your child problem then deal with it, of course a parent should talk to their children with love and with patience or else they won't understand us and they will continue to fight with us and do their thing. Hope that's help. That's all I can say for now. God bless!