I don't think listeners really listens.

If the person really cares he/she will be worried and surely listen. Maybe it's time to make new and better friends. We also must be good listeners to attract people alike so when I'm hurt or lonely I try to do the thing I don't think no one is doing for me and soon karm sort of brings it back in a good way. But probably you must find a better friend, I think we always settle for what we have in the now but we must realize that we deserve always better and actually when having it, to cherish.

I know what you mean. Some people go through all the right motions of listening, but then what they say back to you reveals they've not heard or understood a thing you've said. I'm not sure what the cure for it is though. The way I know that they aren't really listening is that they look at me far too intently - OK we need to look at someone to listen to them properly, but they do it with far too much deliberation, therefore it doesn't come across as natural. Other little signs that they aren't listening is being preoccupied with something else whilst they're supposed to be listening, such as checking the time on their watch.

Thanks a ton for sharing such discussion. Well yes even i have faced the same thing before. Many of my friends are very good at pretending whenever I ask them about the songs or music and they behave and nod head as if they have very much seen it. I do not understand why they cannot be honest with themselves and speak out the truth. Even if they will say no it will hardly make any difference to the songs we are listening. What say?

Hi. I think you'll know if a person listens to you or not by just simply looking at them while you're talking with each other. Ears can listen but the eyes won't lie ;)

If you think some one isn't really listening to you, ask them questions about what you've said. If they are paying attention and listening to you they will answer back with something related to what you've said. I've also noticed to see if some one is really listening to what you've said they will have eye contact with you. Hope this helps!

Just ask in the middle of conversation "Am I right?" or "whats your opinion?" It happens with me also and I hate it like if you are not interested in listening what I'm saying then why you are come to tell me about your things. It is like I'm talking about something very boring & the person don't want to talk to me.

I know when some listen because the do the exact opposite of what we talked about..lol Everytime.. I have been asked, how do you remember this or that. I say because I listen and I take in what is going on around me. It can not be a memory unless you make it so by listening, hearing, watching, and just taking notice. I agree though, now days many are to into what THEY are doing to take notice of anything you say or do.

Yes.. there are really people like that. We've studied about them back when I was in a university. We call such people "eager beavers". They act like they are really listening and would seem like they are interested in what you are saying but when you start asking them questions or ask them about their opinion, they wouldn't be able to answer. Hahaha.. Funny.. A lot of people think when someone looks you in the eye while you are speaking, that would be a sign that he is indeed listening to you. That may be true. But as for me, You would know I'm listening because I don't look at people's face when I am listening. I don't know why but I easily get distracted when I look at people in their face. I get too absorbed by observing every gesture they make and I try to read their face. So when I really want to listen.. as in listen attentively... I would minimize the distractions and wouldn't look at a person in the face. So.. if you really want to know if a person is listening.. better test them by asking questions. (^.^)

There's a big difference between hearing and listening. Your friends do hear you, but they dont listen to you in a sense that they never really paid attention to what you're saying. They hear you in one ear, and let it all out the other without bothering to process. If you feel that they really don't listen to you, then that means they don't really care about you, or they are dealing with something else that's why they can't focus on you for awhile. Give then some time to sort their own troubles out then you can try again. But if they're really doing this to you over and over again, then maybe you should find another friends, those who really care enough to listen to you and lend their support whenever you need them.,

hahaha. It depends on the person you are talking to. Not all people listens though but a lot of people are sincere when it comes to listening, specially those who counsels. For some reason... there are people who like telling me their stories, even their confidential stories. Then we saw each other at some place then we just look at each other as if we really don't know each other. So crazy!