He didn't even think about it..
By besweet
@besweet (9831)
Ireland
November 19, 2012 5:43pm CST
My boyfriend wants to buy a camera that costs $400 but he can't make a plan to save some money every month and buy it in a few months. I can't get this as a gift eithet because it's too expensive for him. So I proposed something. I though that it would be easier if he would keep an amount each month and give it to me to save it and I will also put some money instead of buying him a gift for his birthday and for Christmas. This way he will be able to order it by February. He has the habit to spend all of his savings from his salary each month on silly stuff that he orders online for his bike and I thought it would be a good ideal to keep the money on the side without having them available if he sees something online that he doesn't really need. Anyway, he said no but he still talks about the camera all the time without doing anything to save money and buy it. Do you think he doesn't trust me? We never had issues with money and if we borrow money from each other we always give it back. I don't know why he doesn't want me to help him with a plan.
1 person likes this
6 responses
@Mavic123456 (21891)
• Thailand
20 Nov 12
Ego? Maybe he wanted it to buy by himself. Or maybe, he still lives for himself. I mean not for both of you. Saving money for himself so when he sees something he can have it without consulting you or without asking for your approval. In no time you will see that camera in his hands. It is not because of the trust it is more of "my own". I don't know this is how I read your situation.
2 people like this
@besweet (9831)
• Ireland
20 Nov 12
I've thought about it as well. I don't want to get involved on how he spends his money, I am just telling him that he should be less impulsive and try to have a plan. From my point of view, he can't manage his financial in a good way but I can't say that to him and I can't get involved either. Deep down I want him to ask for my help though! 
I manage my own money as I like, but I wouldn't have a problem to give him an amount every month to save it for me for vacations or something else that I'd like to buy.
I manage my own money as I like, but I wouldn't have a problem to give him an amount every month to save it for me for vacations or something else that I'd like to buy.
@passion4fassion (996)
• Philippines
20 Nov 12
i agree he should be more smart how to spend his money its hard to earn and thats the reason we should think about it before we spend it
@Mavic123456 (21891)
• Thailand
28 Dec 12
I hope your bf will realize this before iris too late. Thanks for the best response . I do appreciate it.
1 person likes this
@cgicale (137)
• Philippines
20 Nov 12
Hi Besweet,
It does sound to me like a trust issue but I can't really say for sure. Maybe he's embarrassed that you'll be the one to save his money because he can't do it. It can be a lot of things. The best thing you can do is actually talk to him about it. It's really not fun to have money issues with your partner (From personal experience)so you really have to talk to him about it. Have an open communication and ask him why he's not willing to work with you to achieve his goal. Then maybe you'll understand more and can compromise with each other. ;)
2 people like this
@besweet (9831)
• Ireland
20 Nov 12
Thanks :)
I really don't understand because I 've asked him and he doesn't tell me! He is always trying to make fun out of it and avoid to answer. I am confused because I also offered to help him and put some money as well from my income, I could give him half as a gift for his birthday and for Christmas, istead of buying him something else for a gift.
I feel like he is not trying to solve his issues because he also has an overdraft to cover and he doesn't take it seriously. His car broke down a few months ago and he needed the money to fix it.
I am thinking that he doesn't want me to get involved in his issues because I can be pushy sometimes! :)
Hi kostas! Yes, you men can be very stubborn!
@kokomo (1866)
• Philippines
20 Nov 12
If your boyfriend tells it again with you that he really wants that camera you should say also to him that he needs to save in order for him to have that one. Do not lose hope to motivate him to save money for that stuff. It is really tiring sometimes to hear those wishes but then he is not doing anything. Tell him also that, he should work hard for it and sacrifice his other vices which was his bike.
1 person likes this
@besweet (9831)
• Ireland
20 Nov 12
I really think that he will buy it in one month and then complain that he has no money for the rest of the month, until he gets paid again! But this will be a bad choice since he has other priorities to cover at his house. He just gets enthusiastic and forget about everything else!
I am wondering though, why he doesn't let me help him and give me a chance to show him that by saving a small amount each month it's actually smoother and he won't even understand how fast he will gather the $400!
@ungu89 (1999)
• Malaysia
20 Nov 12
guy is always like that, never want woman help them. they think they will look weak if woman help them.
but, look that yours , he really want that camera. better explain to him slowly so that he can accept your opinion.
find a suitable time to talk with him, not rush into it
@besweet (9831)
• Ireland
20 Nov 12
I know it's too expensive, but it's a special camera that he can install on his helmet and take videos while he is on his motocross bike. He is going to buy it anyway so I am trying to be supportive and help him get it without spending all his money in one month! If he makes a good plan he will be able to have it after Christmas probably!
