Is Strict Parenting lead to Better Kids?

Philippines
November 20, 2012 6:47am CST
I wonder what parenting styles lead to the "better child". Better child means the one who has good morals, is self motivated, does well in school and stay away from dangerous activities, peer pressure yet still has fun. I observed that strict parents who seem to discipline well, do not always lead to the ideal better child. What you think?
4 people like this
28 responses
@cher913 (25859)
• Canada
20 Nov 12
yes and no. it depends on the child. i think that some children will adhere to the strict upbringing while other children will definitely rebel and buck against that strict upbringing.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (56733)
• Delhi, India
20 Nov 12
Hi! Parents need to balance their conduct while upbringing their children. It is easier said then done yet if child has to succeed in life balanced attitude of his parents is necessary. Too much of strictness or restrictions could hamper a child's natural growth. On the other hand very liberal attitide towards children could also spoil them.
• Philippines
20 Nov 12
Yeah, I agree with you dpk262006...It must be balance because too much is bad and lacking of it is bad also.
@dpk262006 (56733)
• Delhi, India
20 Nov 12
You could address me as dpk only, it is fine with me (it is shortcut of my real name) Thanks for agreeing with me.
@dpk262006 (56733)
• Delhi, India
20 Nov 12
Check you PM please.
@ShyBear88 (41039)
• United States
21 Nov 12
I'm a parent and I don't think that being strict is always the best to raising a good child. Depending on the child and there responsibility depends on what kind of parenting style will work for that child. Some times you need to be tougher and other times softer on a child as well as the age playing a factor.
• Philippines
21 Nov 12
Thank you ShyBear for sharing your opinion as a parent..
@ShyBear88 (41039)
• United States
21 Nov 12
your welcome and i hope it was helpful
@squallming (1776)
• Malaysia
23 Nov 12
The art of parenting lies in understanding the needs and a mutual respect among the family members. Here, communication plays a very big role in determining the harmony and the way children think in the family. Strict parenting does not necessarily lead to better child. By the way, by saying better child, you have not specified better in what ways. If you are talking about more disciplined children, then perhaps strict parenting does do the trick. If you are talking about child with critical thinking ability and mature mind, proper communication may be the key.
• Philippines
24 Nov 12
I stated there what is better child means for me...hope you read it well.. Thanks!
• Leesburg, Georgia
20 Nov 12
My parents were strict on us when we were children and I have never gotten in trouble, I have a strong faith in the Lord, I was a good kid, I never hung around with the wrong crowd or anything... I think too strict is not good, but being reasonably strict to me is a good thing. I turned out better than some of my peers.
• Philippines
21 Nov 12
Hi LovingMyBabies!.. Glad to hear that you turned out better. Your parents is reasonably strict raised you well. And you understand their being strict it's because parents don't want their kids to be at the wrong path of life. Thank you for Sharing!
• Philippines
20 Nov 12
mostly yeah but some will lead to rebellious kids.. they sometimes need freedom. just enough.
• Philippines
20 Nov 12
Especially those teenagers they need freedom so when they parents are so strict they tend to be rebellious...So better not to strict and not to soft.
@kokomo (1867)
• Philippines
20 Nov 12
Yes,I agree with that. My parents is not so strict with me. I can say that I had enjoyed my youth till now because of them. They are considerate,giving and very understanding. They allow me to go somewhere else but advises me to take good care of myself. Actually I felt as if they are my friends too. They understand my lifestyle and my moods. I will implement that too when I'll become a parent in the future for I know the feeling already.
• Philippines
20 Nov 12
Same with my parents as well. They are not strict, I can do what I want, I go wherever I want to go and whoever I want to be with. They trust me well. They always told me that they trust me and always reminds me of knowing what is right and wrong. They don't force me to be like this and that. They let me to be who I am.
@surekharathi (14166)
• India
2 Dec 12
I think no more strict parents means not good for kids because now new generation kids are very sensitive and if parents strict means the child can do the wrong activity. Parents should behave with their child like friends.
@rotloi2 (321)
• Malaysia
23 Nov 12
parent mould and shape the mind of child. child become father...strict parent become strict child. better parent become better child.. you may think why some better parent with rebellion child.. i guess every children is different sicne there are born.. good morals and self motivated and stay away from dangerous activities . ideal better child is only achieve by the child itself eventually. parent+ child abilities.. parent alone always does support role to help.. if you try to be strict then you have to tell the truth why..because children aint follow u after he grow his brain which will follow his own mind
@Pose123 (21660)
• Canada
23 Nov 12
Hi hlfbldmom, I guess people would have different ideas as to what we mean by strict parenting, but in the way that I define it, I think it only makes rebellious teenagers. When parents love, respect and trust their children from the very beginning, and live themselves, what they expect from their children, there will rarely be a problem. Parents who spank their children know very little about parenting. Blessings.
• Philippines
21 Nov 12
I don't think that strict parenting lead to a better kids.The more strict the parents the children will be more rebellious.
@eltobh (231)
• Indonesia
21 Nov 12
Well, I do agree with you. Strict parenting does not always lead to better kids. Sometimes it will make the kids even be a under-pressured kids, or even scared of their parents. Discipline will of course be needed, however, those kids should be allowed to grow or play according to their age. From there, I believe they will be able to see what is right or wrong without being pushed (and they can still have some fun :))
• India
21 Nov 12
As far as I think parents should be strict up to a limit only. If the kids are pushed excessively they will end up doing things u could have never even imagined. Moreover in today's world kids are so net savvy that they can find anything and revert back to the actions done by their parents. There should be a friendly relation between the kids and the parents.
@gilenie (190)
21 Nov 12
in my own point of view its not the parents only will make a good kid as he grows up, it will also be affected by all the things that surrounds him like his schooling his peers his environment. its will still depend on how the kid handle his life.some strict parents may have a rebellious kid since some parents are over protective, the kids try the things that they don't like or they don't approved, for them is a form of excitement and curiosity. as there was a saying the more u get strict the more kids tends to be bad and be rebellious. so what more for the parents is to guide them and talk to them be open, and comunicate well with their kids.
@ally12 (1203)
• Philippines
21 Nov 12
I believe that its better to teach children the word respect rather impose a strict parenthood that will only make them obey their parents teachings due to fear and not because they understand well what is being taught to them. Fear to parents can be overcome soon when children learned to stand by their own but respect stays with eternity.
• United States
20 Nov 12
It seems like there has to be a good balance of promoting understanding/empathy and setting boundaries that appropriate for the age and temperament. Kids have to have some freedom in order to help them learn to make their own decisions. If their decisions are always the result of their parents' rules, they are more likely to abandon them when their parents are no longer in control.
@beenice2 (2720)
• Sackville, New Brunswick
20 Nov 12
That depend on what you mean by being strict.Me and my husband were to a certain degree strict. I mean you don't let the child to have what he wants all the time and when he wants it, that leads to the kid will lead you than. Oh I know the child cries and make a scene and make you feel that your are a big oger and your mean but at the end of all this he is not suppose to win that one, oh yes people looks at you in the store and, well like why you let this poor child cry anyway, that is the usual thing you can go through as a parent, never give up or give in is the key, because the child knows if you are going to let go and will be a pest about it. Correction is always in fashion. Whatever other may think.
@Gamaplus (73)
20 Nov 12
Of course not. If you're to strict they rebel, if you're to easy they rebel. Middle ground is the key. The hard part is to find it??
• Philippines
20 Nov 12
Children nowadays are very smart. And children who are raised under strict rules doesn't always grow up well-mannered. In my opinion, I think it is better to explain to them why do you have to set a specific rule. Be honest about your intentions and don't give them the "just because" kind of reasoning. Encouraging a good communication lines between you and your children is waaayyy better than trying to rule over your child.
• India
20 Nov 12
It is always the better understanding parents and not the strict parenting style. if you are so strict towards your children, then there is always a tendency for them to lose out the attachment with you. if that is lost, then the advice or good morale that you teach will only run into their ears as mere lectures and not do any good.