My boyfriend put his arms in another girl's shoulder...
By Aja103654
@Aja103654 (5646)
Philippines
November 21, 2012 9:50pm CST
...in my dream.
Yes, that's right, I dreamed of my boyfriend being unfaithful in my dream. I believe the dream was triggered by our conversation yesterday.
He reported to me that this girl has been chatting with him in facebook. I knew about her long ago. She seem to like my boyfriend but I can't tell yet if she likes him romantically or if she's just being sweet. For easy understanding, I'll name her PINK and my boyfriend ACE in this discussion.
My boyfriend told me that PINK chatted with him on facebook. She showed him a link of a photo she took of food she cooked herself.
ACE: it looks good.
PINK: thank you
2 people like this
18 responses
@41CombedaleRoad (5952)
• Greece
22 Nov 12
The dream must be a sign of some insecurity tucked away in your head so you should take notice of it. Why not ask your boyfriend to 'de-friend' her, what is wrong with admitting to him that it bothers you enough for you to dream about it? You will know from his reaction how much, or how little, she means to him.
Personally I do not believe in platonic relationships between males and females, I have observed over time that they often go the wrong way and someone gets hurt. I wouldn't like that to happen to you.
If I were in this situation I would try to do something about it for my own peace of mind.
1 person likes this
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
Yes, I'm a bit upset that they are still communicating. I don't have full details about their conversations. But whatever! If she meant something to him to any degree, then okay, that is his feelings, that's something I won't manipulate. Though it hurts, it's something I need to accept.
Besides, I'm number one in his heart. All I can do to lessen her chances(if any) is make myself a better woman.
@music217 (291)
• United States
22 Nov 12
If I had a man and someone was trying to steal him I would do the same thing you did. I would tell her to try because I would be sure that he would be true to me. You shouldn't think too much of it, girls will try to do that all the time. Maybe you should tell her that he has a girlfriend.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
That girl already knows he has me. She keeps being sweet though I can't really say she's trying to steal him because she might be like that to all other guys. Still need to investigate 
@passion4fassion (996)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
oh my gosh sorry to hear that 
well be sure and you should do something when you found something bad 
well be sure and you should do something when you found something bad 
@dpk262006 (58675)
• Delhi, India
9 Dec 12
Your dream's analysis shows that you feel insecure in your heart of hearts and you worry if he would taken away by any other girl (lol).
There is nothing wrong in feeling in such a manner, it is quite natural, we all feel same way in a relationship.
All the best.
@dpk262006 (58675)
• Delhi, India
11 Dec 12
I agree with you that how we deal with such situation in our real life, matters.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
10 Dec 12
Thank you!
What matters really is how we deal with that kind of situation. I have already found a good action I can do if ever I encounter this. Though I'd rather not encounter such a situation.
@asliah (11137)
• Philippines
8 Dec 12
hi,
if i will saw my partner put his arms in another girl's shoulder of course i will feel jealous and anger too with my partner because why he needs to do that,and if i will see in my dream that my boyfriend have another girl maybe its a sign that i need to observe my partner.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
8 Dec 12
Yes, it could be a sign.
But I believe that the dream is telling me of my fears. At least in that dream, I learned how to act cool and know what to do in such a situation. If it ever happens that is.
I'm too lazy to spy on my boyfriend. He should be responsible with his own actions. If there's someone who is making a move on him, then he should be capable of handling that on his own. I'll only be there if it's absolutely necessary for me to take action.
@blogandme (379)
• Indonesia
22 Nov 12
if im in your place, i will ask him;
"do you love me?
if you dont, please leave me alone and please take another girl with you.
but if yo do, please save my heart in your heart, and please dont try to hurt my heart cause i in love with you"
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
Yes, that's nice.
But rather than asking him in words, I challenge him and see how he acts. Action speak louder than words after all. If you ask him in words, there's a possibility that he will lie out of guilt or some other reason.
@passion4fassion (996)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
nice idea yes you can do that and see his reaction go girl dont let him cheat you 
go girl dont let him cheat you @Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
The thought of cheating on me would never even cross his mind. haha, yes, I'm very confident here. hahaha, maybe a tad too much.
he's brutally honest that he is not interested in another girl.
@zurichann (235)
• Philippines
8 Dec 12
I admire you for being matured in dealing the situation with your boyfriend. I always tend to have dreams about my boyfriend cheating on me in my dreams. I don't understand why I'm having those dreams while I never had any problem about him flirting with another girl. I'm thinking that my dreams now were fragments of my past memory that I have been through. My past boyfriend, father of my child, cheated on me while I was pregnant and left me for the girl. I was never been able to do something and just let him go because I know that I don't deserve him. Apparently, I'm still seeing them and I still have the bitterness. So I think these are the reasons for my present dreams.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
9 Dec 12
I can't begin to imagine how it feels to be your shoes. I admire that you let him go. You are absolutely correct, he doesn't deserve and you're better off without him. If I were in the other girl's place I'd be wary because that guy abandoned his pregnant ex he could as well do that to her. I really wonder why some women still accept cheaters?
I hope that any bitterness left inside your heart will go away, and you will find the perfect man who will give you happiness.
@thedataminer (515)
• United States
23 Nov 12
This reminds me of something that was in the news not that long ago. These young teenage girls got together and picked up a 12 year old girl. I can't recall is she was 12 or 14. These evil girls tormented, tortured and finally murdered this poor young girl. And it all started with one of these girls liking this girl that this 12 (victim) also liked. No guy is worth you being violent and hurting another girl. If this guy is causing you pain and it really seems like he is. It seems like he's trying to make you jealous. If he keeps it up you really need to let go of him. Because he will just continue to cause you emotional pain.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
24 Nov 12
That's a scary story. Don't worry I won't resort to that kind of violence over a boyfriend.
The girl was the one who initiated contact with him. He did not do it deliberately. But if he keeps doing this, of course, I would suspect and investigate some more.
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
I agree that it is the cause of your latest conversation regarding that girl who chat with him through facebook.
Don't worry, if your boyfriend wants to cheat you - he will never disclose this matter with you.
But since he loves you that much that is why he narrated the story with you- hoping you will understand.
So I guess you must understand your boyfriend- it's not his fault anyway.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
24 Nov 12
I do understand. The girl's action and his is out of my control. It is up to my boyfriend to do what is right.
That's right LOL, why would he disclose it to me if he intended to cheat? That's why I have faith in him. That's why I prefer he tell me the truth than lie to me as if to make me feel better.
thanks for the response
@mariaperalta (19073)
• Mexico
22 Nov 12
Have you asked him about this ?? Maybe its nothing. i wouldnt worry to much, before I talk to him about it.
@Bluebell18 (636)
• United States
22 Nov 12
Wow. First off, maybe it was also something you ate the night before that made you had that dream (besides the conversation).
Second, I probably would've done the exact same thing if some pop tart was trying to steal my man. (Ten times worse, though. Illegal, maybe) But it was just a dream and those are just projections of our inner selves. Nothing to worry.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
24 Nov 12
I ate fish that night. LOL, I don't think they cause nightmares 
Illegal? What was the dream about?
Illegal? What was the dream about?
@rajashekar2k12 (173)
• Hyderabad, India
22 Nov 12
great dream u got but at what time u got this dream baby.........
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
24 Nov 12
The day before. That was the night after we talked about the girl.
@rajashekar2k12 (173)
• Hyderabad, India
25 Nov 12
u also keep u r hand in another boys pocket.......
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
She can go ahead with the whatever plan she has on my boyfriend, if she had any.
Like I said, I want to see how my boyfriend reacts too. I want to see how strong his feelings are for me.
I'm not threatened. Besides, my boyfriend is old enough to deal with it on his own. I need not interfere.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
24 Nov 12
I dream like that too! And the guys were handsome, but it's not like i fell in love with them. It's more like I was just using with them for their companionship and money woahahha, 
I would never do such things in real life. That's the funny thing about dreams.
I would never do such things in real life. That's the funny thing about dreams.
@lampar (7584)
• United States
22 Nov 12
That is alright, he can put his arms in another girl's shoulder as many time as he wants, it is just a dream. If someone try to steal your man in reality, may be you need to muscle her up and teach her a lesson for trying to steal fro you. But if it is a dream, you should play nice and offer to share with her your man. 
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
Too bad I don't like sharing, hahahaha!
yes, I think I scared her pretty well in my dream. Not very hard to see that happening in real life.
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
I think I'd be doing pretty much the same. I mean, I would fight for my man!
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
Right! But I won't be doing all the fighting! I have to see my guy protect himself too and put up a fight. That's why I told him to deal with it first.
@LovingMyBabies (85127)
• Valdosta, Georgia
22 Nov 12
I had a dream like this a couple of weeks ago, it was triggered by my husband getting a job where he has to go out of town sometimes... So, in my dream he slept with this woman in a hotel room. It broke my heart when I woke up. Usually dreams don't bother me that much but it felt so real and my husband was already at work when I woke up so I couldn't tell him or hold him or anything. It bothered me the whole day!
I think your dream was triggered by what you said, the girl on facebook. Isn't it crazy how our minds do things like that to us?
In my dream I was a victim and I did not stand up for myself at all, I just cried. In real life I would have been angry and done something about it!
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
I believe our dreams shows us our innermost feelings, even things that we are not aware of in our waking moments.
I see my dream as a sign that I really am jealous and it's like a test drive for me on dealing with problems.
I know it hurts real bad and I'm sure you are a lot stronger than you think.
Don't take it out on your guy though since it's just a dream hehe, You have to be ready when dealing with such challenges.
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
22 Nov 12
Sounds to me your dream is a result of your chat with your boyfriend. BTW he knew you would not have a look at his facebook site (talking about cheap tricks your boyfriend is using them!). You forget one thing: there is no woman in the world who can steal a man/boyfriend unless that man/boyfriend wants to. So you can fight that girl, threaten her, call her whatever you like but it's not her you should keep an eye on. For sure is your boyfriend is very flattered of the attention he gets from her. So you better ask yourself how come/why and what he is missing with you. Otherwise he would not spend time with her on facebook. I would ask myself first what is going on/went wrong and decide if I was willing to hear those cheap excuses of my partner again. I don't think so. I would kick him out.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
I'm pretty sure my boyfriend is sincere.
I am aware that he likes the attention but dislikes it too, because it bothers him too.
I don't have sufficient evidence to prove anything. So, I'll stand by and wait. Not that I really suspect my boyfriend of cheating but it's the girl who I believe is making some moves.
There's nothing missing in me. I'm not perfect but I'm perfectly imperfect for him. I can tell. He isn't a typical guy either, if there's any sign that he doesn't love me or love only me, I would dump him immediately.
