What is the proper age in a boy and girl relationship?

Philippines
January 5, 2013 6:35am CST
I have a 14 year old daughter, she always ask me about relationship. She has a suitor already and she ask me if I will let her to have a boyfriend. I only told her that she just finished first her study before she enter into relationship. What is your opinion?
2 people like this
15 responses
@Sureoi (176)
• Philippines
5 Jan 13
You have done the right thing my friend. In that age, they really don't know the meaning of love plus it will be dangerous for your daughter because boys and girls in that age are still exploring for something new. For me, the right age for a right relationship is in the age of 19 and above. Have a nice day and happy mylotting! :)
• Philippines
5 Jan 13
Yes I agree with you, in that age they are exploring for something that is not proper for their age. But today, teenagers are so hot and if you forbid them from that relationship maybe they will be rebellious. Maybe our role as a parent should have a proper guidance to them. And let them feel that we can be their friend. Thanks for response, God bless.
@Sureoi (176)
• Philippines
5 Jan 13
Yes, you're right about that too my friend. That's also the proper way not to turn them against us in today's world. Just don't fail to remind them the right thing to do.
• Philippines
6 Jan 13
I agree with you... Your daughter is still young. It is okay for her age to have crushes but not a relationship.
• Philippines
6 Jan 13
But we cannot avoid them because they had suitors and they can see their friends with boyfriend already and they are very curious about this matter. But we still have to guide them and protect them.
@dandan07 (1906)
• China
5 Jan 13
When I was a student, we were banned to fall in love with classmates, even after we became college student, our parents still did not let us to keep a relationship. They had thought that it was the very period for us to learn knowledge and we had focused our attention on our studies. But now many children even in primary school can have a relationship. I think it is not right to forbid young man to have a relationship, but parents and teachers should make them have the knowledge about how to deal with the relationship and have the sense of responsiubility. So that they will not do something wrong.
• Philippines
5 Jan 13
Yes you are right. You only have to do is to guide them and because you as parent has more knowledge about how to deal with relationship. Give them advise always. thanks for the response
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
8 Jan 13
Every mom would advice the same coz of being worried that either the daughter will not be serious in her studies or worse, get pregnant at a young age. But I think, if your daughter is so open to you about this topic, you may want to guide her through the phase. Coz you know that you can't be with her 24/7. She meets different people everyday. Just don't be strict on her. So she will always share with you everything that is happening in her life. I didn't have that closeness with my mom when I was a kids. I had a boyfriend at 13, actually my first love. It was only short-lived though. But I wished that I was able to share it with her.
• India
6 Jan 13
A person can start dating right after they attain puberty. If they are mature enough they can enter into relationship. But people should wait till 18 before they really want to enter into serious relationship. Studies come first always. People do learn a lot living in a relationship. At 14-15, majority of time there is infatuation and nothing else.
@Shavkat (137174)
• Philippines
7 Jan 13
When I had my real relationship is in College days. We are in an umbrella of very traditional family. We have one condition, to finish our schooling before involving to a relationship.
@owlwings (43915)
• Cambridge, England
5 Jan 13
It is a very good idea to let children explore a wide variety of relationships as early as possible so that they learn how emotions work and that they can actually take control of them themselves. It is certainly true that, especially for young teenagers, emotions can be very powerful and can sometimes detract from their studies but this isn't always the case and, as long as someone learns to be aware of (and 'own') their priorities, a good, balanced social life can be a good thing. It depends very much on the person and how responsible she seems in general but, on the whole, I would certainly not forbid any daughter of mine to start going out with boys at 14 - I would just make sure that they (and I) know what is going on and encourage them to confide. At that age, they are desperate to show that they are individuals and no longer children. It is a tremendous boost to their confidence for you to show them that you can see them and respect them as individuals and as adults and, above all, friends. 'Teenage rebelliousness' is really only valid if there is actually something to rebel against ... though I think many teenagers will FIND something to rebel against, regardless! At least let them know that learning about relationships is a very natural and healthy thing to do at that age and that parents are there to encourage and help them ... but that school work is ALSO important and that there has to be a proper balance which THEY must learn to keep for themselves!
@sriroshan (2585)
• India
5 Jan 13
I think what you have told her is correct. Age 14 is not the right age to be in relationship because this is the age where everyone has to concentrate on their studies and think about their career.
@Mintlin (322)
• China
6 Jan 13
I have my first relationship when i was 16 yrs old. It's pretty early to fall in love at that time,most of my friends they have date when they are above 20 yrs. I know puppy love is not good but it taught me experience how to love. but if i have a daughter, i would not let her to date at such young age,her first mission is study,there are tons of excellent man waiting for her when she grow up.
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
5 Jan 13
There is none. From the moment we are born we have relationships. All kinds of. Children in kindergarten have best friends/relationships already and do fine. There are who even get married. There are also adults 50 years old or even older and they will never be able to have a relationship or get married. So it depends on the person, what he/she is willing and able to invest. To give up or not and the person he/she meets. Most relationships won't stand, nearly everybody has an ex or even more as one. Also these relationships are important (it doesn't need to last forever) since it's a way to get to know ourselves, our likes, dislikes.
@mrsuniega (786)
• Philippines
6 Jan 13
yes today teenager acts as if they are mature enough already. a lot of teens are now entering in to a relationship. I think the right age really for a relationship is young adult. for me teens are just curios about what is happening around them, what is happening physically, mentally and emotionally. teens are not yet prepared for relationship matter. just guide your daughter, speak to her nicely and educate her about relationship.
6 Jan 13
I agree with arreolabryan. If your daughter is responsible enough, have good grades.. so why not? Having a boyfriend can inspire her to do good. ANd if its the other way around. If her grades will go down because she's having too much time to her boyfriend than school... that's the time you will lecture her about that thing. But right now, I think you should give her a chance. A chance to experience having a boyfriend and school. This is a test for her if she can do both.
@Mavic123456 (21898)
• Thailand
6 Jan 13
Yes that's right after she finishes her studies... Until she graduates her Masteral degree. Hmmm no.. Not masteral. Hr Doctoral degree. That's the right time to have a boyfriend and good motivation to finishe her post graduates degree. Lol. Ohhh sorry i thougt you are my mother.... Oh nooo i disdobeyed my mother, because i have not graduated my Masteral degree yet, when i had my first BF
• China
6 Jan 13
I agree with you.In my opinion,14 years old is too young. Yes,everyone has the rights to enter into relationship, but when her outlook of world,life,value and love is still immature,maybe it is good for her to enter into relationship later.
• Philippines
5 Jan 13
IF YOUR DAUGHTER IS RESPONSIBLE ENOUGH SHE CAN HAVE A RELATIONSHIP ANYTIME RELationship can make people happy and work harder if she can be inspired