I'm sorry but I won't kiss that cross

@vernaC (1491)
Romania
January 5, 2013 9:23am CST
An orthodox priest just visited and splashing holy water after that he told me to kiss the cross but I strongly refused. He looked surprised but I'm glad he understand me and did not insist. I don't want to upset anyone but I just can't do it, something in my soul is holding me back. I grew up in different religion where we don't pray on images and I'm sure you know what religion it is. Although I have been disconnected for marrying my husband with different religion but I still continue living of what I learned from my religion. Someday if God will allow me I want to go back and be a memeber again.
4 people like this
17 responses
@thesids (22193)
• Bhubaneswar, India
5 Jan 13
Hi VernaC I am glad to read this. I love people who kind of break trends and grow beyond the orthodox nature of the religion. I am happy that you married someone who is not from your religion and again, you are allowed to practice your own faith and religion. All religions do preach love and harmony and I am sure no God says or lays down rules that you should do this or that like kissing cross or anything like that out of compulsion. The feeling should come from within and if your heart doesnt approve of it, it nowhere means that you are not God's Loved one. The Lord is much bigger and does have a Bigger heart that anyone can imagine.
1 person likes this
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
5 Jan 13
Hello thesids I'm glad that you too understand me. My religion is actually strict in following what's right or wrong, but I really feel it's more wrong to not be with someone whom I love.
@sanjay91422 (2725)
• India
6 Jan 13
I think you have full liberty to kiss or not, and there is nothing wrong with that. I am confused with your line, are you married to a different religion or something? I take it as if you have not married to a different religion person. It is okay to marry to a different religion person, all that is needed is the respect for each other.
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
6 Jan 13
Yes I married my husband with different religion which is orthodox and I am not an orthodox. What you said about respect is true, because as till now, I don't have problems with my husband regarding about religion.
• India
6 Jan 13
I don't understand the meaning of orthodox, sorry I am poor in the general awareness, but I understand that you respect whatever religion he has that is good.
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
7 Jan 13
I'm talking about orthodox catholic and it's a religion more common here eastern europe. It's almost the same with roman catholic but not with every aspect, like for instance how they perform signing of cross in their forehead, they start from down to left to right then then repeat twice.
@mariaperalta (19074)
• Mexico
5 Jan 13
thats your choice, you have to do what you want to do.. not what you are told to do. Take care there... see you soon...
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
6 Jan 13
When I was a kid I'm also lazy attending church mass but as I grew up listening to God's teachings I became interested. I also participated in church activities and made friends.
@ZoeJoy (1393)
• United States
5 Jan 13
Perhaps if you married a man from a different religion, you both need to sit down and have a deep and serious talk about your religions. Perhaps, you both need to talk to the religious leaders of both your religions. If you and your husband don't deeply understand each others' religions, then this could cause a disharmony and misunderstandings in your relationships. Pray and seek God's wisdom and guidance. He wants you to be happy and fulfilled. So, it sounds like you and your husband need to have a deep talk about religion. It may not change either of your minds, but it may help each other to understand and appreciate each other better. And to understand the deep meaning of each others' religions and practices of each others' religions.
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
5 Jan 13
Ahh no, I'm sorry I forgot to mention that it's my husband's granny who called for a priest for a yearly house blessing. I don't have a problem with my husband and his granny regarding about religion at all. I just did not expect the priest would ask me to do that. But I'm glad the priest understands me when I refused. Before I married my husband, we have a serious talk about our differences including religion. And we both understand and respect each others differences.
@ZoeJoy (1393)
• United States
8 Jan 13
I guess you will need to expect some 'surprises' when you and your husband have a different religion. One suggestion is to just put your hands together as if you are praying if you come across another religious practise in which you are not comfortable doing. That way, you can show you are still respectful. My daughter's boyfriend does not believe in God. We always pray before eating and so when he comes over for dinner, he just bows his head to show respect. Both my husband and I appreciate his respect. Glad to hear that the Priest understood. Hope that your family will continue to be a close and loving family.
@Shavkat (129817)
• Philippines
6 Jan 13
I do think it is not advisable to kiss the crucifix of that priest. Kissing the cross is an old tradition way of showing respect to God. Though it is not visible for some priest to do the gestures.
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
6 Jan 13
It's an orthodox tradition to kiss the cross and images.
• India
6 Jan 13
Hi friend, good to know that the priest understand your feelings and don't compel you for the religious activity. As you mentioned you are from different religion and have faith with it. No one can force us to change our opinion, we have the rights to do a thing or refuse it
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
6 Jan 13
I'm really glad the priest understands me and respect my decision. I respect other peoples belief as well and I'm so lucky to be paid with the same level of respect.
@allknowing (103661)
• India
6 Jan 13
My belief is up to a particular age we need guidance and we go by the route our parents take. But once we know what is right and wrong, it should be left to the individual to decide on which course to take. As long as you are at peace with your self there is nothing wrong in the direction you have chosen.
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
6 Jan 13
I believe this too, but we know more about right and wrong in from hearing God's teachings through the bible right? I am very comfortable and at peace with my religion that's why I cannot take another religion.
@eagletrek2 (5501)
• Kingston, New York
6 Jan 13
Hi understand you completely , G-D has a way of Leting know what to do and not to do. If you want to get back involved with Your reglious community. Visit a reform Temple.they have a lot mix interfaith. All vista a Chabad and talk to there Sister Hood.for me I call myself Reformdox. I go to the reform On Friday night and the Chabad On Saturday morning. I'm a koheing and I enjoy Doing that. I might of spell it wrong. OK Have a good day.may Hashem show you The way
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
6 Jan 13
Oh thank you but I'm planning to be back on my religion very soon. It's what I grew up with and I understand so much God's teachings in my religion. I may not able to tell you properly what I learned because I'm afraid I might say it wrong or you might understood wrong but in my heart, I know what is right.
• Greece
6 Jan 13
The first time I saw people kissing icons and crawling underneath them I was quite horrified. My background was not orthodox and I have never understood why priests encourage this kind of thing. On holiday some time ago my husband and I visited a monastery in which there was a mummified saint. The priest expected visitors to kiss the mummy, otherwise he said it was just a side show! I stood back when I realised what was about to happen and fortunately I escaped. The priest was encouraging the others in a rather forthright way but I think I looked so light skinned that he realised I was an alien and left me in peace. We have to be true to what we believe, I would resist kissing a cross too, but it isn't easy to behave differently to others around. If our conscience holds us back we should be strong, as you were, and resist.
• Philippines
5 Jan 13
I understand your reasons for some point, I am a bit like you. I married a man with different religion and beliefs with mine too. I hope too that one day, God will make His way to lead us what are the good for the both of us...
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
6 Jan 13
My husband is actually not a religious person and when we talked about our religion he agreed to convert but I dont want him to do this because he'll be doing it just for me, but in future I'm planning to introduce him to my religion and what he will learn spiritaully and if he's ok with it then I will agree for him to convert to my religion.
@Cutie18f (9557)
• Philippines
5 Jan 13
That is a very common practice in our country. Religious people would kiss the cross and other images. I used to do that as a kid, but when I went to one Catholic school which had Jesuit priest in it, he told us not to do it because we could contract illnesses from that practice. I stopped doing that after Fr. Paul, a devout Catholic priest told us not to do it for sanitary reasons.
@vernaC (1491)
• Romania
6 Jan 13
Sanitary is another thing on my mind about kissing that cross. I was also wondering what if someone else kissed it and they did not clean it first.
• Philippines
31 Mar 13
Every thing in some Christian Churches such as Catholic, Anglican, Aglipayan etc is a just representation of someone. Representations of the different faces of God. This should just help us picture how he could look like. It is like having a photograph of someone you love so much. You kiss and embrace it while crying when you miss this person. It is the same thing with the images and statues inside the church. To me, I go to church when it is empty. I stare at the beautifully carved images on the walls. Not only the statues are well done, showing real human emotions and charisma but also the adornments painted on the frames. Looking at them, I am awed to how great this God- given talent to man. This beauty, has been the way for this artist to express his or her faith to God. But, yeah, neither would I even dip my finger on that holy water in the entrance. Never would I also kiss a priest's hand or ring. If your faith is strong, simple praying and being good to others is more than enough to be a good Christian.
• Philippines
31 Mar 13
I admire you that your belief is unwavering. You didn't kiss the cross even if you are in front of people who are asking you to do so. I myself do not also believe in images but there was a point when I did kiss the cross because I was ashamed that other people might look at me suspiciously. I regret doing that and I promise I won't do that again just to please other people.
@Latrivia (2878)
• United States
12 Jan 13
Well beyond the spiritual differences, if you had kissed that cross you'd be kissing every other person that cross had been with. Gross and unhygienic, dude. You made the right choice.
@iuliuxd (4453)
• Romania
9 Jan 13
I am romanian too, and a christian orthodox, even if i`m not a practicing christian i was baptized and probably i will die inside the orthodox church. It is a common practice for the orthodox christians to kiss the cross, or the icons, or even the remains of a holy person.Probably the priest thought you are one of them, but as you saw, no one is forced to do anything, this is the way eastern orthodox church is, they will never come to knock at your door 100 times trying to get you converted. I`m not sure i understand what is your religion, i think we have almost all the churches here now, so how come your religion doesn`t have one ?
@clrumfelt (5449)
• United States
8 Jan 13
You should practice and hold to your own religious convictions. It's not unreasonable that you would feel uncomfortable doing a practice that belongs specifically to another religion than your own. Certainly you are under no obligation to submit to a religious authority that doesn't follow or honor your own beliefs. God will always welcome you to return to his flock. He is merciful and will in no way cast us out.
@Cutie18f (9557)
• Philippines
5 Jan 13
That is a very common practice in our country. Religious people would kiss the cross and other images. I used to do that as a kid, but when I went to one Catholic school which had Jesuit priest in it, he told us not to do it because we could contract illnesses from that practice. I stopped doing that after Fr. Paul, a devout Catholic priest told us not to do it for sanitary reasons.